06/10/2007

JAPAN!!!!! Part 3

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Part 1 can be seen here, and part 2 is right over here.

Day 2: Suzuki (continued)

The PSP was heavily pushed at almost every single electronic store I went to?

? as was the PS3. But the real hotness was definitely the DS and the Wii. Especially the Wii, which was pretty much sold out every single place I went to. And no matter where I went, if there was a DS section, it was guaranteed that there would be tons of games, and tons of folks crowed around them.

Even though the GBA isn?t really supported anymore, a few stores still had some shelf space for it. Hell, it still must be doing okay; I would find out that GBA hardware outsold PS3 in Japan during my stay there!

I almost got this Rilakkuma DS title, despite knowing that the language barrier might be an issue. But in the end, I ended up getting a PS2 title staring the guy. Haven?t had the chance to play it yet, but I think it?s a WarioWare-esque game, which is better for me.

One thing Joe was on the hunt for was wacky Japanese breakfast cereal boxes. But it would seem that the Japanese really aren?t into breakfast cereal. Though we did spot these?

Throughout the entire trip, myself, as well as Joe and June kept coming across cartoon renditions of myself and MK. Here?s the first one I spotted, in another electronics store.

I guess one of the main reasons why I?m a Mac guy as opposed to a PC person is that I just find PC aesthetically unappealing. Though in Japan, their machines are far superior looking than the crappy Dell boxes that populate America?

A random gum ad featuring Power Rangers?

The next stop was the bookstore. Here’s the cover to your average Japanese magazine, this one covering guns…

And here’s what they look like on the inside…

I couldn?t believe it when I saw it myself: some DVD magazine based on Millennium!

Here are some random covers to pet magazines?

Next was Tokyu Hands, a huge department store that sells pretty much everything that I had heard about beforehand. One section was chock full of assorted novelty stuff. Think Spencer?s Gifts in Japan. There was plenty of maid outfits, some with cat ears, some without?

As well as more ?normal? stuff like schoolgirl outfits and the such?

Here we have Annie wearing a poo hat…

And here we have… I have no idea.

Yet another random bit of awesomeness from the street?

Everything is just so darn CUTE!!!

Afterwards walking around all morning and afternoon, I went back to the hotel with Joe and June and decided to rest my feet and watch some television. Here’s a scene from some cartoon that I think is about potty training…

The sumo championships were also going on at the time. Over the course of my stay, the grand champ, or yokozuna, was featured on all the networking programming pretty heavily. That and the premier of Pirates of the Caribbean 3, which got a MAJOR push in Japan (I have some examples of this later). Anyhow, I grew bored of television after a while, so I decided to go out and hit the arcade again, this time to actually play some games. Didn’t get too far in Silvergun sadly… its been quite a few years since the days in which I used to play the game practically everyday (back in 2002, when I was out of a job due to the post 9/11 economy and could afford to play various games all day long). I also gave Arcana Heart a spin. I played as the Chinese cyborg chick with the huge tits…

Here I am after I defeated this one young girl character who?s a swimmer. She fights while suspended in the air via a huge water bubble, which she would morph into huge arms to pummel you. Pretty original.

Every arcade game has a one-sheet posted above that gives instructions. As pretty as this one is, I could make heads or tails of the game, so it was therefore pretty boring for me. But at least it’s insanely nice in motion.

Also, every arcade’s walls are often plastered with gorgeous posters, many of which I’d kill to have…

Here’s Mario Kart 2 for the arcade, which was pretty popular among high school girls…

As for younger girls, they have stuff like this…

Imagine Pokemon infused with Barbie. You create a character, which is carried around via a card that is swiped during game play, and battles are done via rock/paper/scissor gameplay. The winner gets stuff like dresses and accessories to enhance the character, which also builds up stats I think.

Here’s some Ultraman ride of the kiddies….

Virtually every arcade or shopping center had this warning plastered on the escalators.

At one point I stumbled across a vintage game store. Most have racks that as bursting with all sorts of games spanning a whole range of classic systems.

Really puts the shit you see at Gamestops to shame. Yet another thing the Japanese have over us: they simply treat shit better than Americans. Virtually every single game looked to be in pristine condition. Whereas in America, next time your at Gamestop or a flea market, try finding a game that doesn’t have the sticker torn off or have what looks to be peanut butter smears on them.

Afterwards I went back to the hotel to meet up with the others and head out for dinner. In the lobby I snapped this pic of an ad on the vending machine in the lobby…

… As well as this picture of a salaryman consoling his very drunk co-worker that I stealthily took from afar.

Once dinner was over with, while Joe went to have a meeting with I believe I potential client, I went along with Kieth and Annie for a test run of their inflatable cat outfits since they needed a second camera person (with June being the first). Plus, I wanted to check out first hand the tech that would have been behind the cereal box costume I was originally going to wear for the trip. They choose a lit outdoors staircase in front of a shopping center and it was pretty awesome! Unfortunately I couldn’t take pictures since I was handling a Beta cam, but at least the footage will be on YouTube sometime soon. It didn’t last too long, since a security guard had to pull the plug, but he wasn’t an asshole about it (in yet another example of how there’s no need to be a douchebag in the States, just because). Though here’s a picture of Annie right after she’s pulled her head off.

And when we got back, those two Japanese guys were still there.

We all went home afterwards to get some sleep since we had to get up early the next day, to fly out to to Okinanawa…. AND THAT’S WHEN THE TROUBLE BEGAN.

To Be Continued…

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06/10/2007

JAPAN!!!!! Part 2

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

For part 1, go here.

Day 2: Suzuki (continued)

The second hotel was located near a crab place that had this huge, moving mechanical crab above it.

Also nearby was some public bath house/sauna. Here?s the ad right up front.

With nothing to do till the next day (when we?d all be moving south in Okinanwa to set up the first show), myself, Joe, and June decided to check out all that Kawasaki had to offer. The first stop was going inside the pachinko parlor across the street. They had some crazy machines there, like one based on Speed Racer?

And that shitty Tim Burton Planet of the Apes flick?

An outside shot of the parlor…

Got some lunch shortly afterwards. Lunch that day consisted of chicken culet with rice and curry, along with miso soup. I think the whole thing cost less than $5. Sorry, but I still can?t get over how goddamn cheap the food was. Also, it was wonderful having a constant flow of curry and rice morning, noon, and night.

One of the biggest hurdles was definitely the language barrier. Oh, another piece of bullshit, one that?s pushed by all those aforementioned books for would be travelers: everyone knows a little English and love the chance to flex it. Bullshit. Yeah, they teach English in Japanese high schools, but how many of us in America who took Spanish or French back in the day still remember it? Exactly. But when it came to ordering food, it was never a huge deal because most restaurants have what they served up front, in shellacked form. If worse came to worse, you simply took the person taking your order outside and pointed to what you wanted.

Additionally, I had never really gotten around to mastering chopsticks while in America (yeah, kinda strange considering how I?m half Asian, plus every damn round eye in NYC loves to use them). So it was a struggle at first, but I stuck with it, and by the end, got fairly decent with them!

Aftwards we checked out a strip mall in the area, which had shops of all sorts…

… As well as photo opportunities of all sorts….

Plus, there were arcades, one of the main things I was most looking forward to checking out during my trip. Virtually every arcade in Japan, even though not the ultra special, super deluxe ones, blows the doors away of the best that America has to offer. Almost every single one of them is a minimum of four floors. And always the first one is dedicated entire to UFO Catchers. You know, those crane games.

Consistently the most popular prize was toys based on Rilakkuma, or Relax Bear, which happens to be MK?s fave character. I blew a couple yen trying to get a few things for her, but no mas.

The thing about American arcades is that they’ve basically been overtaken and swallowed by redemption machines. But in Japan, there’s still plenty of old fashioned, honest to goodness, video games to be found. And with most centers encompassing multiple floors, so there’s plenty of space, you have a degree of options that’s simply astounding. The sheer scope of it all was quite simply pretty mind-boggling to me (despite the fact that I’ve heard that arcades there have been on the wane, just like in America). Case in point: Almost every single major game center I went to had an entire section, sometimes an entire floor, for shmups.

Though nothing could have prepared me for the following: an arcade Radiant Silvergun machine!

My jaw literally dropped upon seeing it.

Fighters made up a sizable portion of the offerings, naturally. There were plenty of Virtua Fighter 5 units, again, often getting it’s own section, though that was to be expected (everyone knows that it’s been the hottest thing in the Japanese arcades for quite a while now).

Though also super popular, perhaps more so than VF5, was this Gundam game that looked very much like Virtual On. Some arcades, like the one in Suzuki, would have an entire floor dedicated to just that one game, with each one networked to each other.

Music titles, like Guitar Freaks and BeatMania still seemed to be popular as well, though not once did I see a DDR machine.

Another popular category are machines that supported/worked in tandem with card based gameplay. In the case of this Gundam game, a whole bunch of people play together, and I?m guessing the hottest battles are visualized and shown on the main screen for everyone to check out.

Electronic horse-track betting was also super popular. I’m not sure how it works, if people just place bets or if they perform actions to determine how well the horse does. Anyhow, here’s on with an obvious video game flavor…

And one that’s a bit more low-fi…

Aside from big and jam-packed, most Japanese arcades are also super smoky. Which made the entire scene feel rather… nostalgic. It was like Playland cira Time Square 1997 all over again. It should also be noted that cigarettes are like dirt cheap there… about $2-3 American. Plus they are readily available via vending machines, as well as beer. Yet from what I understand, there’s relatively very little underage smoking in boozing the country.

Anyhow, another totally awesome thing about the place I found in Suzuki is here was an area to just chill and read a pile of manga. Seriously, how fucking boss is that?!

Oh, and here’s some dude playing an arcade version of Zoo Keeper (which I had no idea existed) and his very bored girlfriend who had fallen asleep right next to him.

Stepping outside of the arcades… There were also a number of American fast food chains to be found. Here’s what the menu is like at McDonald’s. Note: instead of meals, everyone in Japan likes to use the term “set.”

Each offers some Japanese-only offerings, like McDonald?s Tamago Double Mac, which I actually had and was pleasantly surprised by.

And believe it or not but cordogs were to be found as well! And trust the Japanese to vastly improve upon the way to add ketchup and mustard.

Yet another thing I definitely went ga-ga over was capsule toys. I?m a bit embarrassed to admit how much money I blew on them by the end of the trip.

Here?s what Joe and June got (they got the cow nipple Frisbee to be exact)…

And here?s a few of that I got on day one?

That last one must be something that anyone on 2chan must also have. Anyhow, we then checked out the toys and games section of a department store. I promised myself that I wouldn?t get toys before coming to Japan, since I figured that I could get the same basic stuff in America, albeit online. But that was before I realized that there?s just such a broader selection in Japan, plus its much cheaper.

Girls mixed with mecha are definitely the in thing. Check out this girl?s camel toe…

Kinda wanted to get this, since I like girls and photography.

… And the past bunch of pictures from Suzuki is next!

To Be Continued…

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06/10/2007

JAPAN!!!!! Part 1

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

WARNING: Many, MANY pics ahead.

And I?m back.

Actually, I?ve been back in the States for a while now, since this past (or I guess now, last) Sunday. And on Monday I had my first, full-fledged American meal, which may or may not be the reason why I became violently ill Tuesday morning. Either my body had a bad reaction to the re-introduction of shitty, American food (perhaps because I?m half Asian, but I had zero problems eating nothing but rice, curry, and raw fish, day and night for almost two weeks? plus I had no allergies the entire time, which was something I was super worries about before the trip, since they?ve been such a problem this year thus far, and according to MK, even my skin cleared up a bit from my trip), or it finally fell apart from being pushed too hard (I barely got any sleep almost the entire time, plus there was quite a bit of physical excursion at the show during the final day). Or maybe I caught some nasty bug my last day in Japan?

I was actually supposed to go back to work on Tuesday, but shortly after waking up that morning, I threw up everything from the day before. So I emailed my job and said I wouldn?t be able to come in, but I?d do work after a light nap. I then figured that after some rest, I?d write a bit about Japanese cell phone culture then enjoy the rest of the day from bed, watching DVDs. Didn?t happen. Fast forward just a few hours, and yet another vomit attack, this one being so bad that I couldn?t even make it to the bathroom. So there I was, on the floor or my bedroom, with my head in a garbage pail, and the rest of me on all fours, and totally naked. Also, with zero trace of food in my body, I was forcing out pure bile at that point. MK was with me, who has a serious aversion to vomiting, so I know it must have been no picnic for her either. But thank God she was there because he nursed me back to health; because I couldn?t even keep water down, I became seriously dehydrated and soon began to hallucinate, but she kept watch over me by placing damp socks (I own no washcloths, so my socks had to do) and got me Jello for sustenance.

I?m a little better now I guess, though I still feel pretty weak and crappy. I simply didn?t have the strength to cover some Pac Man world record attempt earlier this week for GameSetWatch (once again, I’m super sorry Simon), though I have managed to get some work done on the television pilot, which I?m pretty proud of. Otherwise, all the work that?s been waiting for me all this time, as well as all the emails that?s collected during my absence has largely remained untouched? so if I haven?t gotten back to and I should have, I?m super sorry. But I?m just feel so wasted at this point that all I can really do is pass out I?m afraid. Plus, every American meal now leaves me feeling totally shitty; I guess one doesn?t truly realize how bad our food is once it?s totally out of our system. The idea of building up a tolerance for it is depressing on various levels.

And don?t even bother mentioning MoCCA to me; I?m totally in a ?I don?t give a shit? state of mind, simply because I?m sick, plus, I just got back from Japan! All I can say is Unlucky Preview Mini #3? coming out at SPX 2007.

Anyway, back on topic? Japan. What a fucking country. I don?t even know where to begin, so I guess I?ll just start from the very beginning, along with some of the 2,000 pics that I took (the rest I?ll put on Flickr).
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The trip started a little over two weeks ago. Met up with Joe and June, along with Keith and Anney at Newark Airport. The latter the two originally brought on board to create wacky costumes when the original plans called for Clogged Arteries (Joe’s “band”) to be realized as a GWAR infused with Franken Berries stage production, with me assuming the ident of a crazy, killer, mutant cereal box, until things changed. Instead they were on-hand to help handle the huge inflatables based on the characters Joe had created for the fest. We left American soil on a Tuesday morning and arrived in Japan in on a Wednesday morning. Nothing better than a 13 hour flight + a 13 time difference!

Days 1&2: Suzuki

It took less than five minutes from touch down to marvel at the wonderful Engrish and the rather ultra fancy, and somewhat complicated (at least to an American) toilets found at Narita Airport.

The five of use were greeted by ?G?, one of the three Japanese punk kids in charge of the Magma fest (I forget his real name… Tetsuya or Takeshi or something). We piled into his van…

… and soon were off. Here’s some random pictures taken while on the road; please excuse the touristy pics, but I was such shock and awe to be in a different land (it had been a dream of mine for years to be in Japan), plus I want to test out my new camera…

Besides, if I hadn’t been taking pictures of everything like a total brain-dead tourist, I wouldn’t have had my camera handy to snap the out of the blue arm wrestling. That I simply love the small vehicles they have in Japan.

At one point, the vehicle ran out of gas, forcing both Keith and myself to go outside and push it to a nearby gas station. Thankfully we were off the highway by then and in city limits. Keith captured some footage of it, and once he?s managed to get it on YouTube, I?ll pass the link along.

Once filled up, we finally made it to our hotel. The first of many actually… Our first stop on the trip was Kawasaki, which is a city in Kanagawa, which is between Tokyo and Yokohama.

One of the first things I immediately I noticed was the abundance soda machines. They’re EVERYWHERE, like literally every two feet. And thanks to wonders of Japanese package design, everything looked quite? enticing.

So much so that I decided to break my 8+ years anti-soda stance by enjoying a nice, cold can of Japanese liquid sugary goodness.

And it was nice! So, so nice. Unlike the time I accidentally ingested a cola in the states, it went down smooth and sweet. I would later discover that it was largely due to the fact that soda in Japan contains real sugar, whereas in America it?s all corn syrup and other shitty additives. Oh, and in case anyone was wondering, this doesn?t mean I?m back on the soda bandwagon. It?s only for when I?m out of the country. I swear!

Here?s what my room looked like. It was small, but quaint. Very Japanese, with slippers so you wouldn’t have to walk around with your dirty outside shoes.

Though the best part is this sign you see when sticking your head out the window.

Shortly after checking in, Taka, the lead organizer showed up, who gave a brief tour of the town. Along the way to dinner, we got to see all the various things that make up an average Japanese city, such as pachinko parlors?.

… And cuteness everywhere, whether it be flowing in flag form…

… Even at the police station!

Another thing that was immediately noticeable is that a lot of people use bikes to move around. Here?s a whole slew of them parked on the street?

The crazy thing is that none of them are locked down! I?d notice this a lot throughout the trip; lots of stuff that would totally be jacked in New York City are totally left alone. It?s amazing how everyone has a very deep respect for personal property. Either that or they have some fucking insane anti-theft laws. But aside from stuff, almost every person I encountered (at least those from Japan? more on that a bit later) simply had respect for people in general. Which I guess also explains why everyone was so warm and friendly. And makes the rudeness of New Yorkers all the more pointless and annoying.

May as well state this up front: I totally fell in love with Japan, so you’re hear me go, over and over again, about how awesome is, and how its so much better than America, New York primarily. It might be annoying, I know, so apologizes in advance. But maybe I’ll be able to state a compelling case.

Anyway, Taka led us to this traditional restaurant located near one of Kawasaki?s shopping centers. One thing that was true from all the books I read for people visiting Japan is how malls are great places for foreigners to get acquainted with the local cuisine.

The place we went to was hella nice. A real traditional joint: imagine the place where the big fight scene took place in Kill Bill 1, but even fancier.

Here?s something that everyone in our party has head for years that turned out to be false: Japan is not expensive! Then again, we all hail from NYC. But seriously, for our entire stay we all pigged out on a vast array of amazing Japanese delights and it cost us hardly anything! We first learned this when chipping in for the first meal; in America, a similarly sized meal would have cost each person $20, minimum. Yet each person chipped in maybe 4, 5 bucks? Though I guess it makes sense that Japanese food would be cheaper in Japan. Oh, and it goes without saying that it blows anything offered in America out of the water.

Taka decided to take us back to our hotel by walking us through some Yakuza alley. Once I saw it before me, it had finally hit me… I WAS IN FUCKING JAPAN!

Does look like a scene from a movie, doesn’t it? Anyway, there were various karaoke bars and sex places dotted along (or by the looks of it in the picture, a place that offers clients intercourse with real dolls?)…

… As well as a jazz cafe that advertised in flashing neon: “REAL BLACK MUSIC.” I really wish I had a pic, but my camera died at that point. BTW, after-all was said in done, I took over 2,500 pics while in Japan, so I guess its no surprise that I went through over 20 pairs of batteries.

The next morning, I went across the street to Lawsons, a major convenience chain in Japan. A former co-worker of mine once said that you could live off the food served in places like Lawsons or their 7-11s and you?d still be eating like a king, and man, was he not joking. Each serves tons of awesome food, and at awesome prices. Also, the Japanese proves that fast food doesn?t necessarily have to be unhealthy food. I can?t tell you how many of their little rice balls wrapped in seaweed with a little bit of seasoning inside I had. Anyhow, here?s a funny package of cheese that I spotted while getting breakfast.

Also, Japanese television is simply amazing. Here?s some snapshots I took of a show I caught, about some flattop competition.

Shortly afterwards, myself and rest of the gang packed our bags and headed towards another hotel, a few blocks down. Why the move? Good question? and one that was never really answered. We?ll get back to it in a bit. But anyhow, this other place was a bit nicer, and offered a bit more room. Here?s a couple shots of hotel room #2.

The view from my room. I’ve been a fan of Japanese architecture for a while now, and my stay made me appreciate it even more so.

… And that’s it for now! The rest of day two coming up real soon!

To Be Continued…

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