FORT90

In this post:
1. My now once a month look back at all the notable game related news that one might have missed!

Because it’s been about a month since I last did so (plus the weather, especially if you live in New York City, is going to be crap this entire weekend, though I hear it’s also pretty bad in Cali at the moment… along with how the subways will most assuredly be messed up like last weekend’s, meaning lots of folks staying in and looking for stuff to pass the time) how about another rundown of all the headlines and whatnot from the world of video games that’s fit to re-post? Along with assorted bits and pieces that’s sure to be new to most everyone…

EDIT: Okay, I realize how some folks absolutely hate how these recaps are so dense, while others absolutely love the big chunk of info. But even the later group might suffer from information overload this time around, hence why I’m splitting this update in two. The second half will go live around Sunday.

- So where to begin? A LOT has been going on, which is hardly surprisingly, since as noted late Wednesday night, with the busying holiday season coming full speed ahead, the publishers we know and love are spitting things out at a rapid pace. Though I can tell you something that is more than likely NOT going to be underneath the Christmas tree come this December…

The PSP Go recently came out, and all claims that it would be DOA were pretty much valid. Because, in the end, it truly is a pointless proposal. I know I risk looking like a total idiot by quoting him, but the President of Nintendo of America, Reggie Fils-Aime totally hit it right on the head when he asked “What’s in it for me?”

I’m all for digital distribution (I don’t even want to reveal the obscene amount of money I blow each week on tracks for Rock Band or games and apps for the iPhone), but the way Sony has dropped the ball on every single conceivable level. Charging consumers more for a system that technically does less than the regular one? And then charging the same amount for games as they cost on that other system, when the whole point of everything was to save money? Especially when you’re technically getting less in the end (no box or instruction manuals)? Not to mention how it’s costing Sony less money to create the games themselves as well (no manufacturing or shipping expenses on their end)? With the icing on the cake being that, not only are Go owners not able to play the “vast” library of games that’s already out there (aside from nixing the plan to allow folks to trade in their UMDs for digital copies… which BTW I still can’t believe some actually thought such a plan would ever happen, it’s just way too much trouble for Sony whose whole motivation is distance themselves from the past to begin with), all new downloadable releases are trailing behind their physical counterparts by at least a week or two (which is really pisses off many publishers). What a mess.

Though I have zero idea why I wasted my energy and your time with all that text, when I could have just passed along this Mega 64 vid and be done with it. Along with this review, which illustrates how, if you’re gonna trying to go head to head with Apple and their iPhone, you had better come prepared!

- Speaking of Apple, as well as Nintendo, there’s now rumblings that they might have a brand new DS in the wings come 2010. Huh? While Siliconera’s assessment seems pretty on the ball, it just seems like a stupid idea, especially since the DSi just came out. And for Nintendo to make the same basic mistake that Sony has, with trying to compete with Apple, is just plain retarded. Also… and hate to say it… but whatever new graphics chips should be sent over to the Wii.

- Though the REAL news from the past few weeks is how Brandon Boyer’s Offworld is no more. Which totally, TOTALLY blows. After-all, Brandon’s the only guy in the world who pays attention to, let alone knows about stuff like Extremities.

But he’s still writing about the world if indie gaming and awesome iPhone games to look for, just over at Boing Boing proper. But I’ll be damned if I can find any of it, due to their suck-ass site design/navigation. But the good news is that he’s working on something new, which will ideally serve as a successor of sorts! In the meantime, along with all the regular Tiny Cartridge, GameSetWatch, and Siliconera story reminders, this post will serve as the last time I’ll be mooching content from Brandon, at least for the time being.

UPDATE: Wait a minute… new articles are still being published at the Offworld site, but the RSS feed doesn’t work? Hence the lack of updates in my feed reader… LAME. Why does Boing Boing continue to be such a technical mess? At least I can finally find out how Austin GDC was from his perspective!

- Hey, so that douchebag, wannabe game designer, Marc Ecko wants to make another installment of his lame-ass Getting Up: Contents Under Pressure. Splendid. Can’t wait for him to stink up another GDC by lamenting how game designers are uncreative “a**holes” and then go ahead with yet another lame-ass Jet Set Radio/Grand Theft Auto hybrid/rip-off. Seriously, what a piece of sh*t this guy is.

- One game that I forgot to mention in my rundown of stuff played recently was Scribblenauts. Which I’m embarrassed to say I haven’t gotten very far in, primarily due to my severe lack of imagination. I blame the internet for frying my brain! And yes, I’m well aware of how easy it is to exploit the game, I just refuse to do so!

Anyhow, it’s super long, but super meaty: an interview with 5th Cell’s co-creator Jeremiah Slaczka. The most interesting part, naturally, is hearing about the challenges for developing on a Nintendo platform and expectations, as well as pit-falls that comes with it.

- Okay, time for yet another round of Persona related info! Most of which are courtesy of the always awesome Siliconera, and not just because they’re the first to report every single Persona related update that comes up! Anyhow, as some might already know, in the upcoming Persona 3 Portable, if you play the girl character, you’ll get a chance to swing by Inaba, which is where Persona 4 takes place! Your character will get to stay at the Amagi Inn, where a younger version of Yukiko (P3 takes places about 2 years before P4) will be present!

… One word: HAWT. It would be cool if they could somehow bring Chie into the fold, but that’s good enough for me!

- Sticking with the new female protagonist, one of the possible outfits for during battle was recently revealed… again, awesome sauce.

- And when it comes out, the always lucky Japanese will have a choice between the regular edition, which is just the game, and the DX Pack, which includes a Velvet Room shirt, desk calendar, and mini posters! Might pick it up just for the calendar alone, to replace the one I got from the Ikki Tousen: Eloquent Fist deluxe set. Oh, and the shirt looks pretty cool too.

- Though I much prefer Siliconera’s idea of a bonus! And it goes without saying that every vid from that event that one can come across is a total required viewing for any Persona fanatic.

- Or perhaps I should just wait for the inevitable American release? Provided it actually happens… After all, Persona 4 didn’t do quite as well as was expected. Then again, Devil Survivor exceeded expectation, which was obviously helped by the fact that the DS is on fire at the moment, whereas the PS2 is yesterday’s news in many people’s minds, hence a possible reason why not as many people played P4. No American numbers for the first Persona remake on the PSP, whose numbers are perhaps the most relevant in this instance.

- But then you have to ask once again what the deal is with Persona 5? Good news! Altus is FINALLY hiring a PS3/Xbox 360 programmer. Geeze, took them long enough. Which means, Persona 5 in 2012? Maybe?

- Though one has to wonder what it’ll be like. Which brings us to this awesome postmortem by the team behind Persona 4 over at GameSetWatch. This spill the beans quite a bit, though the most telling is how the creation of the game was so draining that it honestly sounds like they don’t want to make another Persona! Or at the very least, part 5 will be vastly different. Which I suppose it hardly a shock since the first two were similar, and then three came in to change things up dramatically. Which got it’s follow-up, so time to move on?

- Lastly, and was gonna save this for my next big rundown of toys and figures and junk like that, but check out these awesome Persona statues from Treasure Festa!

… Tokyo Hunter also has some sweet pics of some R-Type kits…

- While on the subject of shumps, it was recently disclosed that the Xbox 360 port of Ketsui, which at this point is an absolute mess thanks to the wonderful idiots at 5pd, is now on-hold, perhaps indefinitely. Yay. Hopefully the possible success of Mushihimesama Futari in the states (I’m sure you’ve all heard by now that it’s going to be region free) might motivate Cave to go forward with a port themselves, and maybe even start from scratch!

Related: Original Sound Version recently interviewed three of the musicians that were part of the Ketsui Arrange Album, including my good pal virt! AKA Jake Kaufman. I’m assuming that it’s release was supposed to coincide with the 360 port, which was originally slated for this past May. Oh well! Anyhow, gotta get my hands on it, though I’m more concerned with the DoDonPachi Dai Ou Jou arrange album at the moment, which I have a guy in Japan tracking down for me this very moment!

- Also via OSV, what happens when you get 40 of Japan’s top, freelance game musicians get together? they form an alliance, that’s what! Which includes folks like Takenobu Mitsuyoshi, Yasunori Mitsuda, Shinji Hosoe, Ayako Saso, and Akira Yamaoka, which essentially make up about a half of the music on my Mac!

- Oh, and here’s a pic of Yasunori Mitsuda and Nobuyoshi “Sanodg” Sano (another favorite game musician of mine, behind some of the very best Tekken and Ridge Racer tunes, without a doubt) hawking Korg DS-10 Plus outside of a store in Akihabara that Chris Kohler took last time he was there…

- Back to music and shmups for just a sec, another chiptunes pal of mine, Nullsleep, toured the world this past summer and came back with plenty of pics from his assorted stops. Including a number of wonderful shots from an arcade while in Japan…

… That’s Japanese 8-bit superstar Hally playing the Triangle Service Shmup Skill Test!?

- Anyone out there remember the Nintendo 64DD, the hardware attachment for Nintendo’s 64-bitter that allowed one to mess around with the successor to Mario Paint and create custom tracks in F-Zero X? Well here’s what it looked like.

Fun-fact: I almost seriously got one for Doshin The Giant, but the $500 price tag scared me off as a lowly college kid at the time. So I got a PlayStation 1 instead! I also need to figure out how to play the Euro GameCube version!

- On a semi-related note, the vast majority of Sega-philes cut their teeth on the Genesis back in the day, some the Master System before it. But what about the SG-1000? Even the most diehardest of diehards have never touched the thing, let alone heard of it. So behold…

… The days of Sega before Sonic… as well as Phantasy Star, Golden Axe, Altered Beast, even Shinobi. Crazy, huh?

- Sticking with Sega for a bit, a while back, I might have mentioned something called Sega Racing Classics being trademarked, which got me all hot and bothered, since I figured at long last we’re getting a XBLA or PSN port of Daytona USA, minus the name, since EA owns the copyright to the name. And when it was discovered that it was just the name for another upcoming racing game, I became less than excited.

But then this was just revealed. A HD remake of Daytona USA for the arcades? That’s… really strange. Would make far more sense if it were a console release. Besides, the graphics in the original, despite being circa 1993, can still easily hang with whatever the current machines can produce, but hey, the more Daytona the merrier!

- Hey, remember those ultra tiny Sega arcade cabinet replicas from a while back? They now available for pre-order!

- It’s recently been revealed that Ryo Hazuki from Shenmue is a playable character in the up-coming Sega All-Stars Racing. That’s cute I guess. Though call me when the Daytona USA Hornet Gallop is also included.

- This is kinda old, though it was originally posted a bit after the big day, so maybe it’s no biggie in the end: Adam Gouveia, one of the grand prize winners of my Persona 4 art contest earlier this year, recently created this phenomenal illustration to celebrate the ten year anniversary of the greatest video game console to die prematurely…

- And only the most hardcore of Sega fanboys will give a rat’s ass about this: the tannest man in Japan, Toshihiro Nagoshi, is the grand prize for some contest being run in a magazine for night club hostesses (which are featured prominently in Yakuza 3). More than anything else, THIS proves how print is far from dead in Japan, in which women who work at bars have their own periodical. BTW, here’s a pic of the guy from the Tokyo Game Show, surrounded by various bar hostesses (of course), at the Yakuza 4 press announcer…

- Meanwhile in America, the cover for EGM’s grand return was recently revealed, and it features the return of the original logo! That alone guarantees that the issue will fly off shelves once it finally comes out!

- But back to everything in Japan having a magazine, as most are well aware of, Nintendo’s been trying their best to combat piracy for a good while now, primarily the R4-like flash carts. To the point that many argue that the sole reason for the DSi’s existence is to combat such forms of piracy? Well, how exactly do people in Japan keep up to date with the latest hacking methods? They get the magazine, of course…

- 4 color rebellion recently ordered from Attract Mode and took some pics of what came in the box, along with the box itself!

… Ice not included, obviously. Oh, and for those who haven’t been there as of late, the catalog has been updated to include Space Invader ice cubes and Pac-Man over mitts!

- Speaking of Adam, the dude was lucky enough to hang out with Keita Takahashi during IndieCade 09. Jealous? YES. This one post alone illustrates why I’ve been so bored with the NYC game dev scene as of late.

- As for the event itself, who you gonna go to for highlights? Offworld of course!

- Here we have two different items that references Obama’s recent Nobel Prize win (BTW, I try to not spill my political views into my video game reporting too often, by my two cents? among other things, totally unnecessary, though even funnier were those upset with my negative attitude, with one colleague of mine going so far as to claim that I was being “Un-American” , which is hardly a shock since a lot Democrats I know are acting just as insane as the Republicans they hate so much, but I should maybe save the rest when the time is right):

First we have further evidence of why Hideo Kojima is the man, as he deftly tried linking Obama’s win to his upcoming Metal Gear title! And second, the denizens of 2chan believe if Obama can get a Nobel, so should the dude who managed to gather the most complete collection of Dreamcast related goods ever assembled!

- How about another two-fer? First we have The Fresh Prince of Sonic CD. And second, Sonic CD meets 50 Cent.

- ATTN: Katie, here’s more on Jeff Minter’s latest game, Gridrunner Revolution. And for the rest of you, my girlfriend is becoming quite the Llamasoft fangirl!

- Time once again to check into Rising Stuff, where they have yet another look at an insanely obscure import, this one for some Mega Drive game featuring sumo wrestlers. How come Diehard Gamefan never wrote about this one back in the day, huh?

- Guess whose birthday it was recently? Why Manaka Takane, one of the fine ladies in Love Plus!

… Even more evidence of how the game has completely taken Japan by storm… or how it’s just filled with sad, lonely people, can be found here.

- Two new characters have officially been revealed for the US release of Tatsunoko vs. Capcom. To be honest, Zero looked much cooker in SNK vs Capcom, since we was based on his GBA series. That’s still better than Joe the Condor, who is yet another new face on the Tatsunoko side that’s actually just someone else with a slightly different outfit. Sorta like how Tekkaman Blade is just Tekkaman with cooler shoulder pads. Again, where the hell is Speed Racer?!

At least the other half of the first round of new faces, Frank West, looks to be a worthy addition to the vastly more interesting Capcom side. Though I’d still much prefer Phoenix Wright.

- A Katamari cell phone strap…

… One that was actually for sale by the owner on Figure.fm, but that was a while ago, and it’s been long since sold sorry!

- Meanwhile, the iPhone version of Noby Noby Boy is apparently coming along just swell…

- File this under the “well, it took them long enough” category: a sequel/modern remake of Rocket Knight Adventures is finally on the way! I was a MAJOR fan of the original on the Genesis, so when I first heard word, I was obviously very excited. Though it was significantly dampened after watching that trailer. Looks kinda “meh”. Once again… say it with me… I’d rather have the original on the VC, thank you very much.

- Your obligatory NeoGAF thread for this post is from last month, a week or so before the Tokyo Game Show, in which it was rumored that the PS3 might be able to play PS2 games once again, as well as Dreamcast titles too! The latter is clearly the most interesting, though it seems far more feasible on the 360, given how both architectures have ties to Windows. As for the return of backwards compatibility, it would be strictly for a title-by-title basis. You won’t be able to pop in your copy of Dog of Bay I’m afraid; each title would be sold via the PlayStation Store and have it’s own custom configured emulator attached, much like how every VC title has it’s own emulator built-in as well.

It all seems highly probable, but like everything, I’ll believe it when I see it. Oh, and there’s also rumors that Yakuza 3 might be appearing here, but as a download. Again, not holding my breath.

- Hey, I never did directly address the Tokyo Game Show, no did I? Well, guess there?s still not much to say… as previously noted, it totally blew and provided firm evidence that the Japanese game industry is in a total tailspin. Well at least it helped to produce pics of an awesome looking Cyborg Ninja cosplayer…

… And one of Suda 51 holding a real-life beam katana…

- Though it wasn’t entirely doom and gloom. The aforementioned news that Cave is finally looking to the overseas market by making their next release region free shows that Japan’s downfall is finally waking some people up.

- It was also interesting to hear how Natal is actually some real-deal thing that’s being seriously considered for us by folks like Hideo Kojima. And if there’s any game that could use the massive shot in the arm thanks to such new technology, it might be Katamari Damacy, which seems to work really well.

- As for what was playable that’s coming down the pipeline immediately, not a whole lot stands out… though I was relieved to hear that Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker is indeed a real-deal MGS experience, and not some off-shoot that Portable Ops was (which was still awesome, mind you), as well as a damn fine PSP title period.

Dead Rising 2 does indeed look awesome, but I’m just afraid that everything will be too dark for my SD television set. 4 Warriors of Light: Final Fantasy Gaiden appears to be, at the very least, the prettiest looking DS title to date, and the same could easily be said for the upcoming Okami follow-up for the DS as well. Thought the most important thing is how it’ll probably play far better on the handheld than it did on the consoles!

What else made it’s debut or finally showed it’s cards at the TGS? Ummm…. the latest trailer for PixelJunk’s Shooter continues to impress (I mostly like the Sub-Terrania vibe I’m getting). Death By Cube still looks pretty inviting, as does 0 Day Attack On Earth.

Ghost Trick, something new from Capcom that I’ve only seen mentioned over at Tiny Cartridge, appears promising, even though I have no idea what the game is about. And according to our man McWhertor, RayStorm HD is not half-bad! To see what it looks like in action, check out this slightly old-ish trailer.

- I guess that’s it? Again, proof that TGS 09 was definitely on the lame side. Then again, could have been much worse: new consoles could have been announced!

Hey Eric, if you’re reading this, anything I’m forgetting? Wait a minute, just remembered: some behind the scene goodness with Fumito Ueda regarding The Last Guardian. And get this: the dude’s a big Half-Life 2 fan?

We also have Steve Totilo talking with the man about his “less is more” philosophy when painting a game’s story. Which Totilo widely contrasts with the far more verbose tales found in Mass Effect. For the record, I like both approaches.

- Steve’s long form pieces are definitely the highlights of Kotaku, and the main (while some might argue the only) reasons to check the site out. Along with whatever neat little thing or flat-out weirdness that catches Michael McWhertor’s eye, of course!

Anyway, here Steve explains the story behind that message application that I always pass by when going through the 360′s catalogue of indie games. It’s made him $60,000? Jesus Christ… It’s also nice to see someone finally write about House of the Dead EX!

- I’m with Michael when he asks why, as good as it might be, Metroid Prime should be compared with Citizen Kane. Once again, folks REALLY need to get off the video game and film comparisons; it really shows a lack of pride in one’s favorite medium, which at this point is just flat-out aggravating and sad, especially when it comes from a video game journalist.

- So U2 wants to have their own video game. Just swell. You know, I think I’d rather play Guitar Hero Van Halen, thanks.

- Semi-related: the chiptunes tribute to the Beatles is finally live! It’s pretty neat, though as is often the case in such things, some songs are stronger than others. I highly recommend the Psilodump, minusbaby, poke-1,170, and GOTO80 tracks!

- Sticking with the Fab Four, what happens when you combine the Beatles and a shump? You get this.

- Back to GOTO80, the dude has a new music video out, and it’s simply amazing.

- It’s the cast of Street Fighter 4, done all Mega Man-like…

- This viral Tekken 6 ad is just great, and a clear-cut sign of how video game commercials should be. Unfortunately, the second one is a bit too much like other ads, content-wise, with the gratuitous hot chicks, but is still very well done on a purely technical level.

- Meanwhile, this fan made Tekken movie trailer is also rather spiffy. It seems really goofy at first… but that’s only because of the source material… with the later parts getting me all hot and bothered, thanks to all the fighting and familiar faces (with some excellent real-life reproduction of their costumes). It also proves that a great setting can totally make or break a fight scene, especially if it’s based from a game.

- Then you have the fan made Metal Gear Solid flick, which is ambitious looking to say the least (haven’t had a chance to check the whole thing out unfortunately). But once again, great looking locales!

- A while back I mentioned a new technology that allowed a game to recognize the player’s facial gestures as part of the gameplay experience. Well as many predicted, the same tech is being used to allow for “shape recognition”. And since it’s a sex title, let alone one from Japan, it all translates to whipping one’s penis out being an actual part of the game!

- Here we have a nice little rundown of what dating sims look like, based upon the region they’re targeted at. Though more than anything else, it’s case for how 2D women are hotter than 3D women.

- Yet another fine piece of video game fan-art that’s a bit too hot for Life Meter! Starring a girl from Touhou Project…

… Again, don’t get the sudden rise in popularity. And because it’s via Danny Choo, be careful cuz that was actually one of the more tamer pieces.

- An oldie, but certainly a goodie: Snorlax does indeed own.

- If you want to adorn your domicile with video game-y furniture, and you already have Tetris bookshelves, how about this…

- You see tons of video game-y music vids posts all over the place these days. Most are far hipster bands cashing in on Nintendo nostalgia. And most are also lame as well. But not this one!

- For those who want a little bit of veno while playing Kid Icarus…

… There’s also this…

- And Donkey Kong in the grocery store…

- You know why I find this video of skateboarders with neon Tetris pieces on their heads somewhat annoying? Because even in the year 2009, not everyone is able to recognize what a standard Tetris piece looks like.

- If Mini Squadron plays half as good as it looks, then we have definitely iPhone game of the year material here.

- Via GamOvr…

- Same goes for this…

- If you love or hated Jason Nelson’s hybrid video game/interactive poem “I made this. You play this. We are enemies”, you might be interesting in know that he has a new game out called Evidence of Everything Exploding.

- I’m fairly certain that absolutely no one will remember me talking about a game called Panty Explosion some years ago. Well, here we have a rather extensive interview with it’s creator, Jake Richmond. Actually, here’s part one, which is all about Panty Explosion, and here’s part two, centered on another game of his called Classroom Deathmatch!

- Not only has this dude turned his old NES controller into a flash drive, but he added the Konami code for some added security. Neat!

- And here we have a guy who modded his NES cart to play NES games. Just check the video out to see what I’m talking about.

- God bless Mike Tyson’s Punch-Out, and God bless animated gifs.

- Just stumbled across the work of Butt Johnson. And he doesn’t have a lot of it, but his video game related work is pretty neat…

… His Street Fighter 2/Mortal Kombat piece is equally awesome.

- One of my favorite NES games to this very day is still Faxanadu, mostly due to the beautiful and haunting soundtrack. And here we have one of it’s best pieces wonderfully re-imagined via acoustic guitar… and accompanied with an unintentionally hilarious video.

- Finally, my good pal John Green, who starting making a point and clicks adventure staring a teenage zombie, recently got updated! It’s not finished yet, but it’s still being worked on, and what better game could one be playing in honor of Halloween?

I’ll be back later this weekend!

4 comments

In this post:
1. It’s rare, I know, but here I just talk about some of the games I’ve been playing.

If you’re into video games, there’s a good chance that you’ve been very busy as of late. With the holiday season rapidly approaching, the high profile or otherwise highly anticipated titles have been rolling in at a rapid pace. This week alone saw Uncharted 2, Brutal Legacy, A Boy And His Blob, Half-Minute Hero… the list goes on. And to further sweeten the frenzy, there’s been the buy two, get one free deals at both Toys R Us and Amazon. Though I have yet to nab my six or nine games that I’ll play for just fifteen minutes this weekend before putting them on my self to collect dust for the next three months, minimum.

But seriously, I’ve been busying playing like crazy and figured it wouldn’t hurt to pass along my quick and dirty two cents on at least a few of these games. For some, expect a more detailed, full-fledged review in the very near future. As for the rest, not so much, as you’ll see…

UNCHARTED 1 (PS3)
Before diving head first into this fall/winter’s most wanted PlayStation 3 release, I finally picked up the first one on Saturday (in Brooklyn, otherwise known as the land of broken street dates; folks were selling Uncharted 2 all the Fulton Street Mall area, albeit for inflated prices, with the highest being around $75). It’s rare when a game actually lives up to the hype, yet Uncharted manages to do just that. To be honest, I had zero idea what to actually expect… perhaps due to the insane amount of pomp and pagentry that’s surrounded the game since day one. And you know me, the more people like something, the more I want to hate it. Was anticipating some grandiose, in your face adventure that immediately failed to deliver on its promises, or at the very least tried way too hard to impress right from the get-go. Hence why I was almost taken aback by how low-key and almost humble the very beginning turned out. Which naturally becomes something as events unfold, at a thrilling pace. Also, the lead is just this ultra charming and identifiable bloke, something that virtually everyone tries to create but fails at miserably. Basically, the whole game is like Tomb Raider, but finally done right.

DIRT 2 (Xbox 360)
I’m an arcade racing fanatic, one whose really into rally racing, so it goes without saying that I’ve been on the hunt for a modern day equivalent to Sega Rally 1 on the Saturn, since… well… part 2 on the Dreamcast. I enjoyed the first DiRT but found it a bit too challenging, but kept going back due to the ultra sexy interface that CodeMasters is known for. That’s honestly why I picked up GRID in the first place. Which again I loved looking at, but not so much playing. And that’s why I love DiRT2 so much, since it’s a tad bit more approachable and forgiving. Hence why I assume most racing snobs hate it to death. That and it’s not 60 fps. Whatever. It’s still one of the prettiest games ever. And the interface… holy sh*t. Has to be seen to be believed.

MURAMASA (Wii)
Yeah… I think I’m finally done with this one. More or less every complaint I have has already been expressed in good enough detail me thinks (though I’m not sure if I mentioned the totally annoying map system… yes even the map sucks). I wanted to at least clear the girl’s story, but the final boss battle is practically unplayable due to the annoying controls. It’s basically this really big dude that spans multiple screens in every which way that you have to chip away at, one body part at time. Which involves lots of going up and up and up, as well as avoiding his guardians, making the lack of a proper jump button completely infuriating. Again, my mind is kinda blown at how good this game could have been, but how bad it turned out in the end.

BATMAN: ARKHAM ASYLUM (PS3)
Here’s another game whose hype I just don’t get. Above all else, the game is so visually heinous that it seriously makes me not want to look at it. Which of course has an adverse effect on the notion of playing it as well. Though the ultra bland combat hasn’t done a thing for me either; I just find it to way too floaty. Then again, have never been a fan of God of War type games, despite wanting to like them… I just become super bored in no time flat. But I grew so immediately bored with GoW as I did with Arkham Asylum, though the more I played, the more the enemy’s AI began to shine through. Perhaps the later boss battles are insanely fun, though I shudder to think how they might look. Also, I did dig the MGS-elements (I’m all about sneaking around), so perhaps some of the hype is warranted. Might see for myself at a later point.

BRUTAL LEGEND (Xbox 360)
Actually, only played the demo, just to see if it was as boring and as bland as anticipated. Sorry, I know everyone jerked off to Psychonauts, which wasn’t horrible per say, but also nowhere near as amazing as everyone made it out to be either. Easily one of the most overrated games of last gen. As for Tim Schafer’s latest, I actually found the demo to be fairly decent, though I was hardly shocked that Jack Black’s one-liners became stale almost immediately. Anyhow, you’d think the mixed reviews that it’s been getting would make me sit back and grin, but I actually want to pick up the whole thing, now that I hear that it’s a hodgepodge of all these different gameplay elements. Even if some don’t work as well as others, I won’t be as bored if the whole thing was a long, God of War-like experience, since I already mentioned how I find such fare kinda boring.

Thought the most important thing is how it handles its subject matter with a modicum of respect; it’s been odd seeing heavy metal becoming the latest source of laughs. Hence why I was initially very resistant to Metalocalypse, though in the end, Brendon Small knows his sh*t. Which reminds me of the story Mooney once told me, when he was wearing a Megadeth shirt at some party or something; random dude came up to him and said “Hehe… Megadeth, that’s funny.” Which Mooney responded with, “Funny? What’s funny about Megadeth? THERE’S NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT MEGADETH!” But you know, lol hipsters.

MARIO & LUIGI: BOWSER’S INSIDE STORY (DS)
Simply put, one of the best DS games of the year, which is saying a lot given how many truly awesome titles there have been, including Flower, Sun, and Rain of course. And let’s be honest now… when you get down to it, forget the PS3, the Xbox 360, and even the Wii… the one system that has consistently delivered for the past couple of years has been Nintendo’s handheld. Anyway, I’ve only scratched the surface of Mario & Luigi 3, but thus far, it’s everything one could ask for in a portable RPG, and one of Mario’s finest outings yet, regardless of platform. It’s that damn good. The story is awesome and the gameplay is phenomenal, a great mix of rhythm oriented/time-based actions. The music is insanely catchy, and as others have noted, the pixel work in the game is seriously some of the best, for any game, ever.

LITTLEBIGPLANET (PS3)
Okay, I know this game came out two years ago, and despite thinking it was annoyingly overrated and at the end of the day, unfun to an obscene degree, I picked up a copy recently anyway. Mostly because, it’s just one of those things that every PS3 owner should have in his or her library, especially if they have a background in game design. Plus, I had just finished Metal Gear Solid 4 yet again and desperately needed something new for my console. Anyway, I played it for like 20 minutes before becoming bored, and never turned back, though Katie began giving it a go recently. And her reaction to the game wasn’t at all different than most others: “Hey, this is awesome! … Well that’s certainly interesting… What’s going on here? What am I supposed to do? … Enough with the stupid narration… WHAT THE F*CK IS UP WITH THIS STUPID CONTROL?!?!”

In the bitter end, Katie finally gave up by stating “I’ve never felt so dicked around by a game, ever.” Katie goes on to explain: “I beat an entire level and with one life left, went to get to the last checkpoint and the geisha woman who had been helping me is sitting on an electric cloud, which I did not know, and bumped into. So I would have to do the whole level over again! NO. Also, I hate its smug developers with their unskippable photo credits in the beginning of the game. Congrats dickfaces, I h8 u.” And that’s all she wrote ladies and gentlemen!

CRITTER CRUNCH (PS3)
My first taste was as judge for the Independent Games Festival’s inaugural mobile division at GDC 08 and have been in love with it ever since. It was actually my very first iPhone game purchase last year and still gets plenty of play to this day. So needless to say, I’ve been dying to get my hands on the HD version (despite being on a SD set) ever since I first laid eyes on the initial screenshots from Brandon Boyer’s now dearly departed corner of Boing Boing (Offworld, RIP). So now that it’s here, how awesome is it? Fairly awesome… though sadly, it’s just one of those games that just works better on a mobile device as a means of distraction when the MTA is being stupid again. Otherwise, a tad bit on the boring side. But at least it looks wonderful!

BAYONETTA (PS3)
Again, the demo version, and from Japan. Much as been said about the differences between the 360 version and the PS3′s, such as how the one for Sony’s system is essentially a port, and not a very good one at that. Thankfully, I have a standard definition set once again, which means that I really can’t tell how bad the graphics are! Mostly those so-called muddy textures… though it’s hard to ignore the jittery animation, no matter how antiquated the set might be. Technical deficiencies aside, the game thus far isn’t shaping up to be anything special. It’s essentially Devil May Cry except with a hot chick instead of a semi-metrosexual dude, which I suppose is understandable since it’s by the same creative force. Though you’d think, with no one to answer but himself, with no major publisher to appease, one would want to try something a little bit different. But no, not really… a major point that I tried emphasizing during my Games From Japan VS. Games From America panel at the NYAF as yet another fine example of why the Japanese scene is so badly suffering. The game emphasizes style, a point that is driven home quite strongly with its jazzy-like score, very reminiscent of Cowboy Bebop. Would have been far more interesting ten years ago. But today… boring. Make no mistake, I’ll nab the full game once it comes out, if only because it features a woman who gets naked to dish punishment, plus she shoots rather stylish looking firearms. But I’m hardly expecting a re-invention of the genre, though everyone else seems to. Also, I’ll definitely be picking up the 360 version!

KATAMARI FOREVER (PS3)
I remember when the PSP version came out a few years back and my buddy Job, who was as much of a Katamari fanatic as I was, basically said “It’s about as empty and soulless as one could possibly imagine.” In the end, I felt it was a bit of an exaggeration… it certainly lacked a certain something, due to the creator not being involved, though the biggest issue was the gimped controls, but that’s more the hardware’s fault than anything else. After that came the 360 version, Beautiful Katamari, which I actually dug quite a bit, since the power of the system was used quite well. So here we are with it’s grand return home, spiritually speaking, and it is indeed time to finally retire the franchise.

As most folks know by now, it’s mostly a bunch of old levels, mixed with some new stuff. One of the new levels involves you watering an desert landscape with a Katamari that’s essentially a sponge that one must constantly moisten after it runs dry. And that’s pretty much where the new ideas ends, at leas the good ones. There’s plenty of new things, but most of them are not very good; the story involves the King getting bonked in the head and losing his memory. In response, the Prince and his cousins create a robot replacement, which ends up going haywire, so it’s the player’s job to both help jog dad’s memory (that’s where playing old levels come into play, as you’re re-visiting the past) and helping the Robo King rebuild stars. Trust me, what I just described sounds so much cooler than in practice, where the level structure is needlessly confusing. One very lousy new element is the point determination at the end of each round, which aside from being completely nonsensical and seemingly inconsistent, adds an element that’s supposed to make the game feel more like a game, which I guess is a noble intention, but in the end goes against the spirit of the original, which was more about having a good time than meeting all this laundry list of demands. Also unnecessary is the new look; everything is covered in a colored pencil-like graphics filter, which looks neat and all, but why is it there? I believe there’s a few other filers to unlock, but only like three, and there’s no 8-bit one, which seems like a ridiculously stupid oversight IMHO. Plus, there’s quite a bit of slow-down, which I can’t recall ever experiencing on the Xbox 360 version, as well as pop-up, which again I don’t remember on Microsoft’s machine so much. Poor Sony. Though the biggest new dumb thing is easily the jump, which actually doesn’t completely break the game as I had originally feared, mostly because of how utterly useless the move is. It can be pulled off via the R2 trigger or shaking the Sixxaxis/Dual Shock 3… any guess on which method doesn’t work 90% of the time and is exceptionally awkward?

I still haven’t completely cleared the game, hence why this isn’t a full-on review (again, still gotta figure out how to unlock those other visual modes). To be honest, I’m surprised I’ve played as much as I have… it’s not exactly a chore, but I’m not entirely having a blast either. So what’s kept me going? The absolutely gorgeous soundtrack. Believe the hype because it is AMAZING. It really says something when the remixes by renowned chiptunes supergroup YMCK provide the weakest tracks of the entire game. It really needs to be heard by every single Katamari diehard. Though the means to do so, i.e. playing Katamari Forever, might not be up everyone’s alley. Though until a soundtrack comes out, playing this game is the only real option.

… Well, it’s getting late (still kinda sick, enough to skip out on my pal Mal’s birthday party earlier this even… despite the fact that every shindig featuring a just turned 21 year old girl and her friends in the same age range should have at least one creepy 32 year old dude) and I just realized that I’ve yet to give the Wizard of Oz: Beyond The Yellow Brick Road (otherwise know in Japan as RIZ-ZOAWD, a much cooler name, sorry) a spin! Also, even I’m getting tired of all this PS3 bashing. So till next time…

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