03/28/2007

“OMG, Optimus Prime Vs. A Penguin!!!”

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Time for a quick update…

Man, I Really Should Have Told Claire Redfield’s Boyfriend To Get Lost

First off, as promised, a small handful of pics from I-CON. Again, didn’t get many for aforementioned reasons, plus the camera I had was super slow, so I missed a few shots (like the dude dressed as Han Solo choosing which replica Star Wars blaster to get… still pissed about that one, as is MK). Plus it goes without saying that there weren’t as many cosplayers as Otakon, but here’s a girl that was totally elated that I recognizer her get-up; it’s Maria from Castlevania: Symphony of the Night….

I also ran into Optimus Prime at the dealers’ room….

And here he is in the middle of a dance off against a giant penguin….

… The giant penguin won.

Spider Man playing a PSP…

This guy as a ninja turtle had it all wrong, but I didn’t feel like asking the guy why had both a katana and sais (kinda obscured in the pic)…

… Again, slim pickings I know. Another reason: I spend so much time talking that I just don’t have as much time to scan the place. I know there was some eight foot dude dressed as Chewbacca roaming around… though I did catch the other dude in a supremo C-3P0 outfit, with what looked like a hairdryer sticking out of his ass, I guess to circulate air, but there’s was such a crowd around the guy that I just never got a clear shot. Also, I kinda regret not taking a picture of the chucky, mopey kid dressed as Naruto that I spotted on various occasions.

On a related note, perhaps the quote of the entire con was uttered by Dave (Gilbert): “Man, there sure are a lot of sexy Links at this thing!” With the runner up being from MK as she exited a drug store all pissed off due to her cold: “Well, I guess this fucking town has never heard of tissues!!!”

BTW, I forgot to mention that a pair of guys in the audience enjoyed my lecture so much that I’m going to be interviewed for some podcast! I’ll pass along more info when it happens. Also, just spoke to Dave (Quigley) and he says if I can pack a room full of cheering gamer dorks for three years in a row, he’s going to get me FINALLY get me that belt I’ve wanted for so long!

I Swear To God This Shit Seems To Only Happen To Me

With the show out of the way, it?s been business as usual, and business has been pretty busy. I’ve actually been doing a bit of game design work as of late, for freelance, and as a result, I’m finding myself interacting with assorted folks in the local scene more so than usual. Its really funny how six years later, I’m finally getting some recognition from peers via JizzMoppa!

Oh, and of course, I still have my wacky adventures in the subway.

First off, Dave (Mauro) emailed me this yesterday: an article about “shit-magnets”, which I myself have been called, and the possible reasons behind them.

For the record, I believe the reason why I attract so many unstable types is because I not only look like a person who is apparently trustworthy and approachable (or at least I’ve been told quite a few times), but also the type that is easily annoyed, which must be grade A material for crazies to feats upon. I’m not looking for attention, and as humor as some scenarios are, a lot of the time its pretty annoying and I wish I didn’t have to deal with them, though I will admit that I do get some excellent material in the end.

Anyway, earlier this morning on the way to work, I had just missed the train, and most NYCers know what a wonderful feeling that is. So I decided to walk to one end of the platform, to where the back of the next train will be. And then all of sudden, out of the blue and for no real reason, I changed my mind and then turned around to walk towards the other end, where the front of the train would be. I had noticed that there was this person who was sitting on a bench who I was approaching as I approached my original destination, but really paid him no mind. Though I did get the feeling that there was something about him….

As I made my way to the other end, I heard “Hey you, I need to speak with you.” And instantly, in my mind, I was all “Ah, fuck…” So I turned around and it was the guy on the bench. This tall black dude, at least six and half feet tall, and he looked pissed. I stopped and just stood there, and he got in real close, way too close, encroaching into my personal space. Then he asked “Why did you walk away like that?” I gave no answer since there really wasn’t one. He continued “Is there a problem with me? Did I do anything to you?!?!” Already he was raising his voice and getting pissed. In similar situations, I normally just give a dirty look and walk away, but I was genuinely scared since, not only was this guy huge and a potential ass-kicker, but there I was at the end of a deserted subway station, so anything could have gone down. All I could muster was a confused “listen, there’s no problem” but before I could finish, the guy was fucking screaming “LISTEN, DON’T YOU FUCKING PLAY STUPID!!! I KNOW YOUR FUCKING KIND!!!” with his spittle hitting my face. At that point, I bolted past him and made my way towards the turnstiles, so at least if anything went down, the token-booth person would witness it, even though most flat-out ignore anything that gets between them and reading the newspaper. The crazy guy just stood where I left him and just kept starring at me, and was so pissed off that he was practically snorting out of his nose.

Also the day prior, also while walking along the subway platform, and again towards one end, I approached these two hipsters, a guy and girl, and both were fussing with a backpack, when one of the goes “Don’t come any closer, I have a bomb” and the other one just giggles. Both were totally high. Then later in the day, not in subway but at a Circuit City, while looking at DS games, this one guy who was looking at Xbox games just kept farting. So much so that I figured that I had to be on some hidden video show.

Other highlights from the week thus far include an IGDA social mixer last night in which, among other things, I ended up chatting with a lawyer about Mad Magazine and what douchebags the Kennedy’s are. And all this week I’ve been at the Nick Mag offices during the day playing the new Pirates of the Caribbean MMO for a piece I’m working on, and everyone who knows me knows how much I just LOVE MMOs…

Its Finally Happening

As for gaming news, I will admit that I haven’t really been that on-top of things. I did hear right before heading out to LI on Friday that the NiGHTS was finally confirmed. Yay. Again, I’m not nearly as excited as I would normally be if I had heard such news five years ago, and if Sonic Team didn’t suck so hard.

And then there’s the really big news from earlier this morning about Mario and Sonic finally teaming up…

… I guess unsurprisingly, most folks on gaming message boards are relatively unimpressed, but as cynical as I am, I personally dig the mash-up! The idea of long-time rivals finally facing off on such a field of competition is rather “cute”, and even makes a lot of sense. I’m guessing people are pissed that they’re not facing off against in Smash Bros like everyone has wanted for such a long time, but I kinda have to assume that it’ll happen as well.

Haven’t had much chance to go over everything I’ve missed over the past couple of days. Though I did catch word about the new DS zombie game, Touch The Dead, which I took initially thought was a Sega creation.

And over at Select Button, I finally managed to check out a discussion on some ultra obscure PSone title called LSD that’s basically a bunch of dreams in video game form Sound, and looks, pretty neat! Will definitely try and track down a copy for myself… Though I have to admit, I wonder if I should bother with posting my Love Love 2 write-up over there like originally planned. Perhaps one bizarro import PSone overview is enough for that place? Perhaps I could just pass it along to GameSetWatch… The Gamer’s Quarter even?

  • phooky

    Pour vous, monsieur.

    We need to get some hella burgers when I get back.

  • Lisa

    i wanna say i ran into this site && i love the pictures!

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