12/06/2005

Honesty Pisses People Off

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Here are two examples:

1. Okay, remember the missing iPod that I found on Friday night and my attempts to locate its original owner via Craigslist? Well it didn’t take long for the responses to come in. The first couple were from folks who seem nice enough, that stated their case by describing the color and the playlist. When I responded with “sorry its not yours”, they all replied with “oh well, thanks anyway”, and even two folks said it was good what I was doing, which left really nice.

Well its a few days later and the general tone of emails have changed. Most are folks who knows its not theirs but want it anyway for a price. Many aren’t even bothering with proper punctuation or spelling, and a few are being assholes about me not wanting to sell.

For example, here’s one guy who sent me the following yesterday afternoon: “hey I know its not mine but most people who loose theirs never get it. so how much do you want”

My response? “Sorry, but its not for sale. I’m going to look for two weeks and if I can’t find the original owner, then its going to my girlfriend.”

Then later last night, he replied with: “come on dude I’ll give you an easy 100″

I never responded. And then this morning he wrote again with: “so you want the money of[sic] what”

My response? “Again, not for sale.”

And within five minutes, I got: “well your fucking stupid”

Am I justified in saying, what the hell?!

Last night another asked to buy it off me (also using the “hey, you’ll never find the original owner” line) and I again responded with “its not for sale”. And this person wrote back with: “That’s fucked up.” I don’t even know how to respond to that one.

2. Then there’s what just happened at the bank: I went to the check counter to write out a deposit slip when I noticed a bank card just sitting there. I picked it up and asked aloud “Hey, is did anyone forget their card?”

A guy in the line for a teller answered, “Yeah, its mine.” When I asked for his name, just to make sure of course, he became annoyed.

“I said, its mine!”

“Well, if it is, give me the name. I want to check.”

“I ain’t messin’ around, give me the fucking card.”

Right then, a woman also at the check counter began chiming in: “What’s your problem? Give him your name! You trying to be a thief?”

The guy wouldn’t relent and just began full blow cursing at me, so I decided to take the card to the info desk. When I handed it over to them, they explained that a card was reported missing earlier in the day, so that had to be it. Upon returning to the teller line, the woman asked whose card was, and when I told her it wasn’t his, she was hardly surprised. “Some people!” And then the guy went totally psycho, and started yelling at me again! And I just stood there, due to being in total shock. At least the woman got my back by stating “No one is honest anymore!” in a very thick Jamaican accent. But the guy just kept going at me, to the point that I thought he was gonna punch me… and the dumbass Citibank security card just stood there watching the exchange, and with his arms crossed, the whole fucking time. Finally, others started getting on his case, but that was because while in his fit of rage, he was completely ignoring the flashing light for the next available teller.

So yeah, you try to be an honest guy in the day and age, and you seem to only get shit for it. Also, I have no fucking idea why this shit only happens to me….

… Though upon telling my tale, a few coworkers shared comparative tales. Thank God they’re other honest people out there, as well as other firm believers that karma can be a real bitch sometimes, so it’s best not to mess with her.

  • Swimmy

    Have you tried plugging the iPod into a computer or anything?

    My history prof lost his, and when someone else tried to put new songs on it, some security message with the prof’s name popped up. The guy who found the iPod found my prof and gave it back to him.

    (But don’t ask me, I don’t know how they work.)

  • http://www.xanga.com/naokicc,http://www.myspace.com/randyhigashi Randy

    I’ve been coming and visiting your site and Insert Credit for quite some time now and I do enjoy reading the entries here. I also have much respect for your actions in trying to find the respective owner of the ipod you found and the anecdote of your experience is horrifying. I’ve had my share of similiar experiences while working at my local Blockbuster last year and can say that yes, some people can be the biggest assholes. Don’t let that shit get to you. Keep up the fantastic work.

  • http://www.marionvitus.com Marion

    Matt, you are not alone. But when you’re the only one in the room, it can sure feel that way! You’re the good guy, that’s why I like ya. :)

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    Swimmy: When I first plugged in the iPod, I expected to see a name, but I only got the first name… whereas when you plug mine into a computer (well, a Mac) you get my both first and last. So it belongs to a person named Jessie, and the name of the iPod is JESSIE’S IPO, which leads me to believe that this person is a PC person, hence the all caps and the cut-off at the end. Even if the full name was present, it would have been cut off I guess.

    And as for everyone else: Thanks for the kind words, I sorta needed to hear them. :)

    I don’t why the bank at the incident really got to me as it did. Again, you try to be the good guy (or girl, as in your case Marion) and you just get shit on sometimes. But that’s life, and I’m already starting to sorta laugh at today’s events. Though again, I’m also befuddled that these things always happen to me. But as my roommate said after I told her, that’s what makes the story so funny.

  • Swimmy

    Well, it should have gotten to you. It defies all logic. “So… you’re angry at me because I got in the way of your committing a crime? How fucking horrible for you, dude. Want me to buy you a beer to soothe your tender wound?”

    You know, it’s not even that guy. There’s always going to be a few rotten people. What’s sickening is that nobody else did anything to help you until he got in *their* way. Maybe they’re just afraid of crazies, but that’s pretty messed up.

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    Well New Yorkers certainly do have a knack for tuning things out. I guess you have to (especially with so many crazies walking the street), but it often goes too far.

    I was appalled when I asked a bunch of people, mostly friends and acquaintances, and all “New Yorkers”, what they would do if they heard a woman screaming from the other end of a dark alley, and they basically said that they would not get involved. Some did say that they would call for the cops, but no one really said it with much vigor.

  • http://slonie.com Slonie

    The craigslist thing is par for the course, but man, that credit card story is insane.

    I once found a cellphone in a gutter (it was a nice one, too!) and managed to reunite it by the owner by calling “HOME” to their kid. The kid was a little confused, but in the end the owner was able to get the message! She never did email me the photo I took with the cameraphone though, as she promised to :p

    (yes, a phone is a LOT easier to “do the right thing” with than an iPod…)

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    Mind I ask what the picture was?

  • j

    crazy.
    didnt i tell you before that I TOO found an ipod once?

    10 gig. on the sidewalk. in front of the gramercy hotel. two year anniversary of 9/11. (did i feel extra guilty? yes.)

    there was a name on the ipod. and a playlist… and i considered doing exactly what you did on craigslist.

    why didn’t i?

    because i knew EXACTLY what happened to you would have happened to me. a thousand people claiming it… or trying to buy it on the cheap.

    that and i didnt do it because i wanted an ipod.

  • http://www.jennydevildoll.com Jenny

    Gah, people suck.

    Still it’s cool of you to try and locate the iPod owner and insist on getting the name for the bank card. That guy pretty much proved himself a thief IMHO, if I’d lost a card I’d be happy to state my name to get it back.

  • Westacular

    1) I would just completely ignore any emails trying to buy it. If a person emails you without good faith, it’s not worth the time to respond.

    2) There is something strangely compelling, at least in my imagination, about a woman in a thick Jamaican saying, “You trying to be a thief?”

    I heard some crazy stories over the summer about people doing The Right Thing in returning forgotten cell phones. Like, leaving it in a taxi. IN PARIS. And the cab driver calling you up and going out of his way to ship it overnight.

    I also remember one time, at a co-op job, a coworker receiving a call out of the blue from a stranger that was basically:

    “Did you lose your wallet this morning …”
    “Umm, I don’t think so–”
    “…because I found it!”

    Apparently it had fallen out of his coat pocket in front of a grocery store on his way in that morning, and someone had picked it up, and (based on whatever was in it) called his house. His wife told the good samaritan the office phone number.

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    I’ve got a good lost wallet story: This girl I knew who was staying with me and my roommate over the summer lost her wallet on the way to work. There were credit cards and exactly fifty in cash. So she did the whole calling and canceling credit cards spiel? About three weeks later she gets a letter from the MTA stating that they found her wallet and that it was ready for pick it up. Once she got it, she found all the credit cards intact, as well as sixty dollars. Yup, there was ten extra dollars! Plus there were tons of business cards and the such. Apparently, the person who had initally found the wallet was using it as their own… they must have spent the original cash (which were fresh from the ATM) and over the course of time replaced it with their own. Strange huh?

    And hey j, didn’t you buy an iPod a short while later, and you ended up accidentally breaking it, and Apple wouldn’t fix it? You know what they say about Karma…

  • j

    nope. wrong guy. i’d never buy an ipod.
    but when i find one on the ground… it’s mine.

    what’s that? kharma? i can’t hear you… i’m listening to my ipod.

    but seriously.

    sure i could have at LEAST tried to craigslist it like you did. but like i said…
    i knew how that would turn out and you’re dealing with it right now.

    if the person was smart enough to put their name and contact info on the ipod where it belongs… then it’d have been a different story.

  • Faithless

    I applaud your courage. Keep it up.

    I have a similar story from this week, in a way. I live in LA, where as everyone knows, there are 3 cars per human being. This is especially evident in my neighborhood, where parking is almost impossible after 3pm.

    What’s worse is the lack of courtesy that park-ers show when arriving home. It is generally acceptible to park 10 feet from the nearest car, which means that the block has about seven or so less spaces at the end of the day.

    I have tried to put an end to this. I will pull up to the car infront of me or to the curb behind me, consciously allowing for as much neighborhood space as possible.

    Until this week. When I pulled up to a car and a guy ran out of his house, wearing FM Radio earphones, screaming at me that I had parked him in. Now, there was more than enough room for me to walk between our cars, and enough space behind me for another car to park, but he wouldn’t have it. He yelled at me so much that other people started coming out of their buildings to listen. Although a few people defended me, eventually I had to move my car back (as he was threatening me with violence, and I’m just a small girl worried about running into him in the evening).

    This, like the iPod, is simply about human principles. You should always do the right thing, because you are the one who conceives of rightness, and to go against it would be to deny yourself.

    Oh, and I hate crazies.

  • http://slonie.com Slonie

    Faithless, in your case it’s the fact that the average person can’t drive for shit (parking within reasonable dimensions is part of this!), combined with general assholery.

    Threatening you with violence, wow. In your situation, I’d like to have said “learn how to park, jackass!” but that would probably result in either physical harm, or a nice solid love tap from the opposing vehicle.

Previous post:

Next post: