04/14/2006

Hard To Believe

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Despite the fact that I’m totally swamped with so many things and am super stressed these days as a result, plus how I have to do my taxes later today, I’ve been feeling pretty good all these week. Why? Because the weather has finally been nice for more than just a few hours at a time, and that has meant just one thing: BBQ! I’ve been firing the grill for dinner every evening this pas week, and its been pretty sweet; the act of char-broiling meat is one of the few “manly” things I engage in, really.

Last night, Raph and Deeanna, who are both in town from San Francisco, along with a bunch other folks came over for dinner. It really felt like the Muppets Christmas special, because one of the steps on the deck was broken, so Steph & I had to constantly warn people about it, but whenever anyone new showed up, we were always too late, so almost everyone at one point or another almost slipped and broke their neck. That was until it finally broke, which goes just fine with the broken railing in the front stairwell, which a neighbor of ours also tried fixing last night, despite it being past 11 at night (the guy’s a handyman, plus his wife has been out of town all week, so he’s like super bored). I unfortunately couldn’t hang out for too long since sorting out my receipts from the past year beckoned, plus Steph set up the projector in the backyard to screen Walk The Line, which I had already seen (decent flick, but I’m not exactly compelled to see it again). I was sorta miffed that she had also gotten Ben Hur, and I suggested we all watch the chariot race scene, but no one was into the idea, though the real problem was that everyone thought I was wanted to watch the whole movie, and that’s just crazy.

So like I said, I simply went back to my room to work on my taxes, with the Red Dwarf season 5 DVD playing in the background, which I only got for $10 the day prior! The Suncoast in the Manhattan Mall was closing down, so everything was massively on sale. Most of it has been heavily picked over, but I still found quite a few buried treasures, but since I’ve been dirt poor all week (I got paid today, thank God), I only got a few things, such as Cromartie High School Vol. 1 for $9, Gregory Horror Show for $7, and the Red Green Xmas special for just $4 (yeah, I’m into that show… its a Washington thing, I guess).

Later that Wednesday evening, I had dinner with MK, who had just arrived from San Fran. She told me all about APE, including how one of the aforementioned Brooklyn indie comic chicks read the nipple boy story from Unlucky #2 and became seriously distressed and ill, which is absolutely insane, yet pretty funny, and even a tiny bit flattering. MK also told me how everyone has asked her “Where’s Matt?” and it was nice to hear that I was somewhat missed. I also really loved her response, which was “He’s poor.” She also mentioned how during a conversation with Dave, it was agreed upon that I really need to start making shirts again, and I think they might right. MoCCA is right around the corner…

Then it was off to movie night. The feature was Ravenous, which stars Guy Pearce and Robert Carlyle. Its starts off about cannibalism during the era of the Spanish-American war, but turns into a vampire flick, with philosophical overtones. Never has there been a movie with a more intrusive, yet totally captivating soundtrack. Anyway, it was pretty awesome, and I was actually interested in seeing the movie when it first came out, but I guess it got totally lost in the shuffle that year, which was 1999, when about a million other amazing movies came out (Being John Malkovich, Run Lola Run, Fight Club, Iron Giant, Toy Story 2, Three Kings, Magnolia, and others I’m probably forgetting), but primarily because in the trailer there’s a shot of a campfire, and I recalled seeing what appeared to be a Game Boy in the fire (which I didn’t catch this time around… maybe I’m thinking of another film’s trailer?).

Jeff had also saved the previous week’s episode of South Park, so I was able to catch up on what I had missed and get up to speed for that night’s second parter. All I have to say is the Family Guy parodies were so spot on that they could have seriously been the real thing. Its just too bad that Comedy Central had to pull the rug from underneath the show at the end like that, but then again, its all par for the course, seeing how all networks these days are scared shitless of the religious right and lawmakers that are using their vendetta against movies, TV shows, and video games as a smokescreen for all the other unbelievable bullshit that’s going down, primarily in the Middle East, and how they’re toying with our freedoms, even well-being, all for the sake of making an obscene profit, but I’ll save that rant for another time (or maybe not, since I basically said all that there needs to be).

Before I go any further, I just have to say (once more), I LOVE YOUTUBE Its positively the greatest thing ever, next to ketchup and air conditioning. The site just has EVERYTHING. Case in point, I was hanging out with Rob and Michele this past weekend (to watch the Stan Winston/Lance Hendrickson 80′s horror classic, Pumpkinhead) and I was causally talking about how I had once heard Lisa Loeb mention on the Howard Stern show that she once appeared on her reality show in just a thong, which I had always been curious on checking out, but I couldn’t since I didn’t have cable (plus I did see a bit of the show when I was back in Washington, but I seriously wanted to blow my brains out after 30 seconds, Lisa Loeb or not… sorry, but I just fucking hate ALL reality shows, they’re all annoying and one of the main reasons why television is such shit these days… though I will admit that I really enjoyed the Littlest Groom… you know, the one about the dwarf guy who had to choose between dwarf women and regular sized women… which really did prove that God doesn’t exist, because I’m pretty sure He wouldn’t simply said “fuck it” and blew up the world the start over). Anyway, when Michele heard this, she went onto YouTube, and within 15 seconds, came up with this. Thanks again Michele!

Anyway, I recently uploaded all the game related videos which I was previously hosting (primarily to save some money, since the traffice they generated somewhat contributing to my monthly bandwidth charges). So if you haven’t checked them out already…

- early work-in-progress version of Rez, back when it was still going by K-Project video #1

- early work-in-progress version of Rez, back when it was still going by K-Project video #2

- early work-in-progress version of Rez, back when it was still going by K-Project video #3

- even more footage from the cancelled Sonic Xtreme

And I was going to upload the following, till I found that they were already up there…

- Mario on ice and Mr. Belvedere as Bowser (the best part is perhaps Jason Bateman trying to explain to Alyssa Milano how to play Super Mario Bros)

- one of the greatest feats ever performed in a fighting game (and the best part of this vid is when watching it with Joe, and hearing him scream “NERDS!!!!” immediately afterwards)

The next step is to start uploading all the weird wacky game related vids I have just lying around my computer. There’s one in particular that simply has to be believed, but I just can’t seem to find it anywhere, so instead, here’s a clip of really creepy Street Fighter cosplayer. And I believe its actually a dude.

One last YouTube clip, here’s a look at the Silent Hill 2 dog ending. Its plenty kooky.

As for gaming news, there’s nothing really exciting to report, other than that Guitaroo Man is heading to the PSP, as well as Silent Hill 1, which will not only receive a graphical upgrade, but new elements to reflect the movie. So we’ll soon be getting a game based on a movie that’s based on a game (yes, just like Street Fighter: the Movie: the Game).

Oh, and here comes yet another piss-poor and ultra transparent to (sorta NSFW btw) “empower female gamers by eliminating the negative online stereotypes towards them”. Yeah… whatever.

  • http://drunkensamurai1.livejournal.com/ TDS

    damn man,for some reason it wont let me me see the lisa loeb thong this without signing up,care to send me pics?

  • Jason

    TDS — use BugMeNot for Firefox to bypass the sign-in, now and forever.

    I love the Bateman-Milano vid, especially the yuppie couple standing behind the computer monitor reacting to everything on the screen facing away from them.

  • mk

    Wouldn’t that Girls of CS thing be more empowering if the girl’s shirt was buttoned? Or is it to empower hookers? Because I rarely find myself posing in poofy shirts without having buttoned them, also I wear bras, and this is like a comfort thing, especially when shooting anything. You don’t want your boobs floppin all over the place, and if you’re doing like the least bit of running, it’s totally time for a sportsbra. Also, I want to know what anatomy classes whoever did that silloutte logo took, because I don’t know anyone whose boobs stick out that far when they’re arched backwards.

    What exactly are these stereotypes? That girl gamers look like Sloth from Goonies? Because otherwise I don’t understand.

Previous post:

Next post: