July 2004

07/24/2004

GET SO WASTED!

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Last night I went to CBGB’s for the Medusa Festival, which was a showcase of female hard rockers, though I primarily went to show support for one of the event’s organizers, and friend, Joe Simko.

This was the third year for the fest, and once again, there was a very healthy turn out (primarily with the lipstick lesbian crowd). The funny thing about CBGB’s is, no matter what the night or the occasion, the crowd is often a total mix of randomness, and last night was no exception. Granted, you had your die hard scenesters that been at the club since the 70′s, as well as the current generation, but there’s also quite a few businessmen, fraternity brother and sisters, soccer moms, really old guys from yachting clubs, and 10 year old kids.

To be honest I was there primarily to chat with friends, but I also got to meet and chat with one of the member of Lady Unluck, an all girl band that opened up last year’s fest. The first time Joe saw them play, they were dressed as pirates (which sounds, and was, fucking awesome… too bad I was stuck at work or something and couldn’t go that night). When I finally did catch them play, they had some glam rock vibe going on, though while everyone else was dressed as classic 70′s Brit/80′s new wave punks or members of KISS, one girl simply wore only a potato sack, which happened to be the one I was speaking with. She was ultra friendly and extremely cute, and the band as a whole is pretty damn good, by the way. I was given a flyer for a show that’s tonight (which I unfortunately can’t attend due to prior commitments) which is actually a fundraiser for a planned roller derby show. It proudly proclaimed, “Get so wasted!”

As for the bands that were actually playing last night, I really didn’t pay much attention to any of them, except the last one, Valeze, who I was super impressed by. They had an awesome sound and I think I’ll have to make note of when they play next. But the real star of the fest were either some tall guy who rocked out the whole night while standing with a broken leg and on crutches, or some really weird old guy who simply convulsed to the music with a beer on each hand (attempts to take his picture with my camera phone were unsuccessful; there wasn’t enough light).

By the end of the whole thing, my friends and I were at various levels of drunkenness, so what does one when do in such a situation? Seek out greasy food to soak up the booze of course. I guided everyone to a 24 hour burger joint where we spoke about, among many things, world face time traveler John Titor. It was funny hearing from the British gentleman in our party that Titor’s legacy is quite known in the United Kingdom, and that his warnings have even gotten members of Parliament worried.

The train ride home was entertaining thanks to a rather old and crusty homeless guy who had a genuinely funny routine. His best joke was…

” A 13 year old boy told me, ‘Ask me why I’m crying,’ so I asked him why he was crying, and then the boy said, ‘Cuz R. Kelly just stole my girlfriend!’ “

… and then he shimmied across the train singing I Believe I Can Fly. Fucking hilarious. That man not only got fifty cents from me (in quarters; that’s laundry money!) but he earned it that night.

By the time I got home, it was 4 in the morning, and I was disappointed to find out that I had improperly set my VCR, which therefore did not record Decisive Battles, a show on the History Channel which recreates famous battle via a video game engine.

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07/23/2004

My So Called Life

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

I have a tendency to bitch a lot to my friends and coworkers, but in reality, I can’t complain. Why? Because I have the life others can only wish for (well if you’re a hard core gaming nerd, or a loser that is). A life which seems to totally revolve around video games. For example, here’s a look at earlier today, which I guess technically was yesterday…

7:30 a.m. Got up earlier than usual due to an assignment for Nickelodeon Magazine. But before heading out (and while waiting for my hair to dry), I always check out the Gaming Age Forums, usually to see if any of my posts from the night prior (usually around 3 in the moning-ish) received any responses.

9:30 a.m. I interviewed Michael Braglia, a kid who submitted an original character to Sucker Punch, the makers of Sly Cooper for the PlayStation2 as part of some contest. As the grand prize winner, his character, which is some sort of kung fu simian, will appear in the upcoming sequel, so I ask him about that and other things (and get a ton of Monty Python references in return).

11:00 a.m. Met up with my editor at Nick Mag to hand off the interview tape. I love writing for Nick, not just because it’s always fun, and there’s the chance to see & play games before anyone else, as well as meet some awesome people (Miyamoto!), but I get paid handsomely as well. In addition to the checks, there’s always shwag on the side: today, my editor passed along a pretty neat-o Mega Man shirt.

12:00 p.m. It’s lunch time, but at home; today is my first day of vacation, It’s also time to check out the latest headlines in the world of games. I go to the “big guys” first, like IGN and GameSpot, but then I always try to stop by the more niche-oriented sites like Insert Credit. Today I just noticed that my post about Game Engine 2 got mentioned on the front page!

1:00 p.m. I normally reserve all my Game Boy Advance playing for subway rides, but last night I went to a Sony cocktail party, and instead of trying out Ratchet and Clank 3 or Jak 3 (ugh), I ended up playing my companion’s GBA instead; in hers was a copy of Bugs Bunny’s Crazy Castle 2, a really old school Game Boy title for those who don’t know. So now I’m on a classic Game Boy kick, which today was appeased by rounds of Tetris (the original Game Boy version is still the best in my book, no matter what anyone says), DuckTales 2 (which was also brought on by listening to an mp3 of the theme, courtesy of the same friend from last night), and Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages (gotta remember to pick up Oracle of Time while I still can find it). I really wish I hadn’t sold my copy of Donkey Kong ’94, now that I hear Mario vs. Donkey Kong sorta sucks.

1:45 p.m. Checked the mail and found the Fall Continuing Education Bulletin for SVA (my class is listed on page 46). It’s 10 sessions instead of 8 (hooray!), but its also $100 more expensive (sorry). Also checked the SVA website and the fall class is also now available for online registration.

2:00 p.m. Took a nap. My doctors (as well as numerous friends) have been nagging me forever to get more sleep, and I guess vacation’s the time to do it.

4:00 p.m. Woke up later than I wanted. I’m rushing to get stuff done, but yet I still have time to stop by the GAF and other gaming forums.

4:30 p.m. Had a conference call regarding possible development work for PixelJump. I really wish I could say who it is, but since it’s still in the talking stage, I obviously can’t. But let’s just say, I find the possibility of working with this is person very exciting.

5:30 p.m. Went to SVA since I still had class to teach. Waiting for me in my mailbox were two games from Ziff Davis, to be reviewed for GMR. Spent the next half hour finalizing my note for the evening…

6:00 p.m. Class begins. Went over my impressions of the Game Engine 2 event, which was followed by a discussion regarding the Japanese game industry, which according to a 1Up article that’s getting a lot of attention right now, is on the brink of death. I pointed out that whenever the gaming industry goes through a generational shift, from one console to another, there are always doomsday reports, usually citing the possibility of another industry wide crash. This piece points to the Japanese public’s apparent disinterest of the console scene, and how cell phone games and online titles are instead being embraced. The author makes some good points, but neglects to make a few others as well.

While I agree that perhaps games are becoming too complicated, hence why cell phone games, as well as GBA titles (which Nintendo’s Satoru’s Iwata is more than happy to point out) do so well, one shouldn’t blame other gaming outlets for the lack of interest in console titles. It’s like when people in comics blame video games for the loss in readership; as Peter David pointed out at a panel I once shared with him at this past Icon, people will always make room for whatever is fun and enjoyable, regardless of the medium or format, and that ultimately one’s attention is never solely focused on just one type of distraction or hobby. And I just wish the author pointed out that the Japanese economy has been in a major slump for over 15 years now, hence why sales might be steadily declining. That there is another reason why perhaps mobile and online games are doing so well: they’re simply cheaper to play.

This lead into a several other discussions, mostly regarding the independent game scene, or more specifically, if there is one. I explained that yes there is (several actually), and it’s thriving, though the public just chooses not to pay any attention to it (and that the very concept of an “independent” video game scene is either completely foreign or just absurd to most). I pointed to the home-brew scene as an example, and listed the thriving underground Dreamcast scene, along with what’s being done on the Game Park 32 as a few examples.

Next were not one, but two in-class assignments. The first was to take an existing 2D game and describe how they would handle a 3D treatment. It was funny hearing one student describe how he would do a 3D Tron game and then telling him that not only does one exist, but it’s practically pixel perfect to what he has just described. Next was to design a game catered to one of the following audiences: teenage girls, people between the age of 39-65, fans of the show Trading Spaces, troubled youths, people with learning disabilities, and fans of the film Titanic. For such a “jokey” assignment, I was surprised by all the ideas that were generated; most could easily be turned into legitimate (and dare I say profitable) games.

10:30 p.m. I’m home, just had dinner, and decide to play games. The one’s I’ve been assigned to review for GMR? Of course not. Instead, I take another jab at Mega Man vs Ghosts ‘n Goblins. I still can’t get passed the jumping portions in the second level due to the shoot and jump buttons being reversed. Now I know what the GameCube Mega Man: Anniversary Collection must be like.

…. So now you see why I really don’t have enough time to do all the things I really want to be doing, such as drawing, reading comics, and watching cartoons.

Also, at the very end of the night, I went to get some cereal for a midnight snack and noticed all my cereal boxes were covered in grease. Once again, since they cook every meal with oil (and this include soy milk, I serioulsy kid you not) the air gets so filled with fats, it has no where to go except inside the cupboards to further ruin my food.

So I think I continue to bitch about my day to day existence.

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07/21/2004

Finally…

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

Starting tomorrow is ComicCon in San Diego, the place to be for not just comics, but movies, and toys, and anything else that makes nerds and fan boys drool. It’s the biggest event of its kind, hence why major announcements are always made to start a title-wave of buzz and excitement. But there’s only one that I’m looking towards, one which I’ve been waiting almost my entire lifetime for:

Yesterday, my coworker Steve showed me this, the personal website of Don Murphy, a Hollywood producer…

http://www.donmurphy.net/

Just one look at the splash, and there’s quite a few films which anybody should be familiar with. But notice the small, Optimus Prime to the upper right? Click on it and you’ll get the following message: MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT COMING – COMICCON 2004. Could it be, at long last, the official announcement of a live action Transformer film?!?!?!

This possible news fills my heart with both joy and sadness. First the joy part. I’ll start by saying about fucking time. I’m surprised it’s taken this long for a big screen, live action adaptation to finally get underway, especially since the wave of films based cartoons and tv shows has sorta passed. But 80′s nostalgia is still in effect, and this film could be it’s Citizen Kane.

Actually, I think I know why it’s taken so long: money. Considering how much special effects would have to be used, and every frame of computer animation costs thousands, It would have been financially impossible to do an even half way decent live action interpretation. So filmmakers had to wait for just the right time, when the technology would be readily available, and at just the right cost.

In comes Dreamworks. As I’ve been told, they recently created a massive motion capture workshop for the upcoming (and highly creepy looking) Polar Express. Now that the film is in the final production phase, the studio still has all this technology lying around, waiting to be used, and they’ve been shopping it around town. So it’s been theorized said technology might at last make a Transformer movie, most importantly a good one a reality at least.

Even if it’s not, I really don’t care. I already know it could never live up to my exceptions. I just want Transfomers to finally go completely mainstream. I already see way too many gaudy Autobot and Decepticon logo shirts being worn by people my age who also happen to the same types that made fun of me in grade school for always drawing them and talking about the show, so why stop there? I want to go to the Union Square movie theater and see women in their mid-thirties walk away disappointed that “the Transfomers movie” is sold out.

As for the feeling sadness part, that’s because a Transformers movie finally happening and I’m not directing it. It has always been a life long dream to direct the live action adaptation, and for years now, I even had an idea for a fake trailer, which I could easily do and distribute on the internet, in hopes of generating buzz and a possible movie contract (I think we’ve all seen those stories from Entertainment Tonight of some Hollywood exec catching some crazy vid some obsessed fan did in his basement and saying, “Wait a sec, this kid’s got talent! I think we’ve found the new director for Iron Man the movie!”)

EDIT: By the way, and I suppose this is as good a time as any to post this, here’s a site that has some Transformer porn, which I found a long time ago, but lost the link, and recently rediscovered thanks to memepool:

http://razormoon.fateback.com/consort/

I really love the author’s explanation of Transformer sex…

“My general standpoint on TF sex is that they’re all gender neutral, just with different styling & personality types that sometimes read as female or male to a human audience. Of course, that’s hardly any fun from the fanfic point of view, so yes of *course* Tracks is gay, Starscream is bi and Soundwave is straight as a board.”

Nice to see there’s no confusion regarding Sounwave’s sexuality, but I’m sorry… I had Tracks as a kid, and that guy was not gay.

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