03/03/2008

“The Beginning Of The End”: San Francisco & GDC 2008 Part 4

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

GDC Day 4 continued

A shot near the hotel, which was located near City Hall…

After dropping some stuff off after the fourth day of the GDC, I went back to the convention center to meet up with Jon Hayward, aka Sonictail from the forum, and yet another Aussie who wanted to say hello in the flesh. And on the way there, I ran into Joel Carroll, so we chatted for a bit. The subject of girls ruled the conversation for whatever reason, and from this point on, whenever I talk about messed up girls, I will use the term “diddled”. As in: “it’s obvious that some of the girls here were either diddled by their fathers too much, or not enough.” Goddamn, Joel is simply awesome (EDIT: for those seeking clarification, please refer to this). Afterwards I finally met up with Jon, but couldn’t hang for long because I had to be at a function being thrown by EA, “An Evening With Will Wright & Friends.”

On the way there, I came across two others attending, but they weren’t journalists like one would expect, but simply students. I would soon discover at the affair, that a wide range of folks had been brought together, not just reporters but game makers. Word was, EA was still looking to hire people for Spore. So in that sense, it felt like a shindig an evil villain of Bond’s was throwing, a recruitment party you could say, and what better way to get people excited enough to sign up than to feed them (good God was the food magnificent), liquored up, and have them hear from someone about them getting involved with something that would involve world domination (well, that is what the game is all about, right?).

Eventually the MC hit the stage, some EA PR dude who goes by the name of Neil Young, and for whatever reason, I yelled out “Old Man!” which got a “that’s mean” reaction and a poke in the back from Gaming Steve (whatever; first off, Old Man is a great song, second, like he hasn’t heard that a million times already, and third, he gets paid enough to put enough any amount of bullshit… the dude’s EA after-all). Anyway, before bringing out Wright, Young mentioned that his presentation would NOT be covering Spore, and that there would be no questions regarding it during the Q&A afterwards either. Yay. But eventually, any grumbles were immediately evaporated once Wright came out…

Gotta say, it was a real pleasure to finally see and hear him in the flesh. His presentation was on the world we live in, primarily the fictional realities that are created for the sake of entertainment, enlightenment, fulfillment, and profit, primarily how said fictional worlds have evolved and become a reflection of the times, as well as those who embrace them, and vice versa. One thing that was pretty clear is how Wright loves entertainment, primarily television, such as his astute observation that the cast of the Gilligan’s Island more or less encompasses the seven deadly sins…

… I really wish I could go over everything that was said, because it some fascinating stuff was covered. Nothing groundbreaking mind you, but again its clear that Wright pays attention and notices EVERYTHING, hence his ability to make connections that are glaringly obvious, yet most people ignore or take for granted (which I guess is a necessary trait for anyone who designs games that are based upon observation and management on a God-like scale). But for the most part, it was his charm, like how halfway through he put the topic on hold to talk about Russian space history…

… As well as his constant reminders how often real life often reflects art…

… But I still have no clue as to what Spore is really about, nor understand why I should care. Maybe I’m in the minority in this, but I could honestly give too shits about it. Actually, I do know a little, and… it just sounds so incredibly BORING. And too much work, hence my attitude. The gigantic, impenatrible fortress of hype that’s surrounded the thing is also a major turn-off, to the point that, aside from being extremely annoyed, I’m beginning to think it’s blind devotees (and there are plenty of them, trust me) have no f’n clue what its about either. All they know that it’s the ultimate video game, period. I suppose in the end I should just be happy that a verified game designing genius like Will Wright is able to do exactly what he wants with unlimited resources, even if its the empire’s dime. But again, the game sounds massively boring. Whatever. If it does indeed turn out to be the greatest game of all time, then I will happily stand in line like everyone else to buy my copy and eat crow. Though we all know what’s going to happen: it’ll come out and be good, maybe even very good. But not the mind-blowing, “everyone one, put whatever the fuck you are playing RIGHT NOW” experience that has long been promised, and the thing that will be embraced by all gamers, everywhere, regardless of their affinity for gaming, or even their experience. And all the game’s apologists will immediately state “they just don’t get it.” I wonder what they will say when the game to end all game’s first expansion pack comes out?

Afterwards, I did some mingling, though I mostly hovered around the mini corndogs section of the buffet table, like a vulture in heat, when I got a call from Brandon; he was at the White Wolf party and said that I absolutely had to be there. I had initially blew off the very idea of giving it the time of day, or in this case night, as mentioned last time, but Brandon was adamant that I had to come. All it took was “Dude, there’s naked chicks EVERYWHERE.” to get my ass in gear.

Well, the party did turn out to be an extremely happening affair, the very first one that felt less business and more pleasure. Though truth be told, I’ve been to parties here in NYC with the same basic “theme” but taken to a much further, legitimate level, so to say it was wanton debauchery is rather overkill (then again, I roll with a different crowd). Like how the girls involved in the party weren’t totally naked, just very scantily clad (well one was more or less nude, with body paint to at least offer the imagination a little work out). It was like a scene was out of a cheesy, direct to DVD flick, one about “the underground”; most were in either S+M attire or “cyber-vixen” get-ups, cuz, you know, video game dorks. Some were moving and shaking in the dance floor below, with a few in cages right above, or engaging in the S+M antics upstairs. And of course, that’s when my camera decides to die on me, but this cell phone shot from the nice booth that the boys had claimed turned out quite nice…

Then again, I’m pretty sure some folks would prefer the lack of photographic evidence from that evening plastered on the internet; the S+M pit encouraged members of both sexes to step up to get chained and whipped, which a VERY cute student volunteer precisely did, who was so not 21, and even got semi-naked (she kept her bra on… unfortunately). Christ what a scene. Note to self: check Flickr to see if any other people’s pics are out there.

Actually, this one kinda/sorta came out and shows a tiny bit of the action. Sadly, that cutie I talked about is not the one you somewhat see here…

You also had women in sexy nurse outfits administering jello shots via syringes (I had like about five), as well as a roving band of midgets where power packs (think the proton packs from Ghostbusters, but) will with multi-colored booze. Either giving out tubes filled with them, or just shooting the stuff directly in people’s mouths (I got about ten or so shots in various combinations… and a picture of one does exist, taken by a GAFfer, though I have yet to receive it… and once I do, I’ll post it immediately).

Back to the aforementioned booth; Brandon, along with Bill and Mike Sweeny, also from IGDA NJ (whom I ran into super drunk one night, on his way to make a homeless guy cry… supposedly for his girlfriend), had set base in the sweetest spot in the whole club. Which made it a prime target for dumb bitches. When I stepped away real quick for some drinks and food, I returned to see some new faces, including two female ones. The first was some ABC News AM radio reporter, who also does a podcast related to Worlds of Warcraft or something, and had stolen a seat. I managed to distract her and steal it back, who then got uppity, but whatever, fuck her, plus I didn’t even have to get rid of her by getting into some huge argument, as per the original plan (by basically reminding her that terrestrial radio is dead). Though the second woman was much harder to deal with; just like the AM radio personality before her, as well as that stripper from day one, she acted like she was God’s gift to us, a bunch of nerds that had obviously never seen nor smelled a woman. Cuz, you know, we’re involved in such gay shit as video games, and not like every single one of us either has a girlfriend of is fucking married. Making things worse is how she went on and on about how she “loves nerds”, cuz you know, its not like that fucking terms hasn’t been beaten to death by this point…

Speaking of, a word of advice: if you’re a “nerd, and proud of it” then congrats, relax, sit down, and shut up. No one cares anymore, EVERYONE is a nerd these days. We’ve “won” if that’s actually important to you. Also, if consider yourself a nerd because you’re “quirky” or “strange” or “different”, well, who isn’t? So you like Star Wars or Star Trek or even Battlestar Galactica? Congrats, millions of people enjoy that same stuff, including jocks, lawyers, old people, etc. And to your brain dead bimbos out there: you wear glasses? Congrats, you have poor eye-sight like so many other tens of millions of folks on this planet.

… Making things even stranger was how she went on and on about how she liked to fuck nerds, and how nerds make her cum… all this with her boyfriend right next to her. Who seemed kinda embarrassed at first, but somewhat flattered, and then progressively more and more annoyed as the night went on. So the girl tried to get shit from us (basically, to get our asses out of the booth and make room for her other dumbfuck friends) by flaunting her tits and pussy, but also openly admitting that she’s got a man… Christ, what kind of gameplan is that? I tried my best to humor and annoy her, but it was something I said at random, not directed to her, that caused a scene: I used the world cunt, and her happy-go-lucky demeanor immediately soured. She found the word absolutely disgusting, and was livid that I would dare use such a word, especially in her presence. My response was, hey, we use it every fucking day her in NYC. But it was enough to get her to leave, so mission accomplished! Stupid fucking cunt. Later on, I actually apologized to her boyfriend for upsetting his woman, but by that point, he had enough of her shit.

Anyhow, once the place had become too packed to breathe, and after the midgets had exhausted their receiver of blue liquid, it was time to make my exit.

GDC Day 5

Had to get up super early Friday morning, since there was a Nintendo presentation on the development and future of the Wii’s user interface at 9 sharp, and given the massive turnout for the one on Wii Fit on Wednesday, I knew this one would be no different. But by this point, the 9 hours of non-stop conferencing and socializing afterwards till late for the past 4 days was starting to take its toll, and I needed a break. Not just a chance to sleep-in, but a desire to check out the city proper; all week the weather forecast had predicted doom and gloom, and aside from some rain on Tuesday night, it had been really nice. And since that morning was also shaping up to be exemplary… and how it was almost certain the next day, my last day to spend time in San Fran before flying off, was definitely going to be strong winds and showers, I really was not in the GDC mood. But hey, I had a job to do…

As expected, the line was long, but not as long as one would expect, but the one afterwards was going to be a real madhouse, so it was nice to get in early and save a seat. Anyway, the topic was again on the development and evolution of the Wii’s operation system, but the real reason why I totally had to be there was to hear about the WiiWare, which up till that point there had been absolutely nothing was known about it.

The talk was given by Takashi Aoyama, aka “the supreme leader of hardware” over at Nintendo these days. He started off by reminding everyone that the GameCube had very little to do with the internet, yet at that same timeframe, they were doing extensive research regarding what could be done in that space, but for the next console (with the assumption being that by that time, high-speed internet would be cheaper and more readily available). Eventually, the “console realization project” was in full-swing (God I love the Japanese), which led to the creation of a philosophical checklist, including “fun for the entire family”, which played heavily into the design of the Wii-mote, as well as “something new everyday” and “always on hardware.” Not too long afterwards, they came up with hardware that did just all that, but were somewhat at a loss as to how to really use any of it. It was the little things about the interface that were tough to figure out, like deciding how people were going to enter text (either the “cell phone method” or “the Animal Crossing method”), or streamlining everything to ensure a “stress free” experience, when compared to a PC, which could theoretically do all the stuff they wanted people to use the Wii for (the idea of user accounts was one of the first things to go; who the hell likes passwords, and if multiple people are using the same machine, then that’s even more trouble). Stuff like figuring out the precise length for menus and lessening load times, right down to millisecond, was always an imperative task; Aoyama was constantly sweating the small stuff. A bunch of random factoids from the development process were then disclosed, like…

- At one point, the idea of parental controls and forced shutdowns were pushed hard, yet most didn’t like the idea of restrictions, but most knew that they had to get parents on their side. The compromise was the play history system; instead of a hard limit, it allows parents to monitory their kids’ habits, since you can’t erase the history.

- In order to really making the concept of making it fun for the whole family work, they envisioned a scenario in which parents would be asking their kids to turn on a video game console in the morning, which of course was madness. Hence why stuff like the news and weather were incorporated.

- The team also wanted the Wii to be a companion to television, which led the menu options to become “channels” (which also helped to alleviate clutter for an ever increasingly busy interface). On a related note, there’s a TV guide channel in Japan, with an American version coming in the near future.

- Miis was not part of the original plan. Long story short, Miyamoto had created a portrait creation tool for the N64 (which some folks out there might remember… I believe it was part of the 64DD Bulky Drive) that no one knew what to do with. But it was added to the Wii when they realized that it could be used as yet another means to get everyone interested in the system and its games (hey, who doesn’t like creating a virtual self?), plus the whole thing did a whole lot without taking up hardly any bits and bytes, nor did it consume any resources.

- You know that blue light that the system emits when its “off”, but to let you know there’s a message waiting for you? It’s rhythm matches the call of the Japanese bush warbler, or the uguisu…

… But overall, nothing particularly exciting. By the time Aoyama addressed all the stuff that version 3 of the Wii menu would support, such as channels based soley on a game (as explained previously for Wii FIt) and setting a personal picture as the icon for the photo channel, I was bored stiff and began wondering if we’d ever hear about WiiWare. And then all of a sudden, Aoyama switched gears and finally began talking about it.

First it was mentioned that in today’s economy, its harder to take risks, due to the high cost of manufacturing and the like, so having games sold on a virtual marketplace solved all those headaches and allows for a larger degree of flexibility in terms of pricing and greater chances to be taken when it comes to content. And because selling old games for the Virtual Console has worked out great thus far, Nintendo figured it was about time they tried selling something new. Sounding good thus far… But then Aoyama began talking about the new Nintendo Channel, which is already up and running in Japan (of course) that allows for people to download demos for DS games, as well as rate them, and there’ll also be loads of media for other upcoming titles like screenshots and movies. Okay, sure. But they’re also working on providing additional content for existing games, for a price of course. Oh, just splendid. The same shit that has plagued the other consoles and their “marketplaces”. While the idea of folks creating additional stuff for a game after its out to extent its life is great and all, like communism, it just never works out that way.

Back to WiiWare…. games will be purchased via Wii points, like VC games. Cool. Then a short clip of an upcoming title called Lost Winds from an outfit called Frontier, which looked nice I guess, was shown (sorry for the lack of pictures, but again, Nintendo wanted no pictureshas to have at least one traditionally published game under their belt. Jesus Christ. When Nintendo does good, they do awesome, but when they drop the ball, they motherfucking DROP THE BALL. BTW, one of the main reasons why I’m so pissed is, and I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned here before, but I’ve had an idea for a game that would be PERFECT for the Wii. Oh well… But again, what a goddamn letdown.

At least I had a seat reserved for the next session, the one on Super Smash Bros Brawl. And as anticipated, it was a TOTAL madhouse. The place became packed something fierce in no time flat, and it was the first time in which I saw people shed their professional demeanor and become foaming fanboys. Hey, it was the end of the week, and it was fucking Smash Bros. When Masahiro Sakurai hit the stage, his podium because immediately swarmed by those wanting pictures and autographs. The one thing that I noticed the first time I saw him in person, at the Grasshopper music talk, was how fucking young he was. I knew the guy created Kirby, but had no idea he was 19 at the time, till JC informed me.

Right off the back, Sakurai broke out in song, which is always a swell way to kick off any hour-long talk. And then he got right into it, by explaining a bit about his background; the dude’s a freelance designer, whose firm is called Sora (Japanese for Sky), and its just him and his two assistants, who I believe handles all the clerical stuff. Besides himself, a bunch of artists from Game Arts (you know, the folks behind Lunar, Silpheed, Gun Griffon, and other classic Sega CD/Saturn games), as well as a number of folks through Nintendo proper (mostly temp staff) all worked on the new Smash Bros, about 100 people in all. Hal Laboratories, with whom Sakurai was associated with, and which was also a major part of the past two games, were not involved this time around.

Various aspects to Brawl’s creation was touched upon, such as character selection; planning began around 2005 (Snake was actually someone they had in mind at almost day one… Sonic was the last to be included, in 2007). Choosing fighters was a pretty tough task; one couldn’t just pick and choose, willy nilly. Each character had to bring something unique to the table and stand out on its own terms, yet also had to add to the balance and not disrupt it. It was also mention, though not really explained, that due to legal reasons, they couldn’t even utilize every Nintendo character that they would have liked to. Next was graphics; with every character coming from different games, each with its own dedicated art style, getting them to look unify was a delicate task. The biggest issue was dealing with body proportions; some characters have exaggerated body parts, and when standing next to someone who’s more realistically shaped, it can be visually jarring. In the end, unifying the color scheme was what worked the best, plus adding little details, to let people know that they were all in the same universe (as well as to accentuate their individual personalities… like adding wear and tear to Mario’s overalls, or making Olimar’s outfit more spaceman like, since the dude is an astronaut after-all). Every change had to be approved by each character’s respective creator.

In terms of updating characters, Pit was the most difficult since he hadn’t appeared in anything since Kid Icarus back in 1986, and had no benefit of constant updates over the years to study from. So Sakurai and his team tried to imagine what Pit would look like now if he had appeared in a new game every few years or so, just Link. In the end, they took the basic feel of Twilight Princess Link and added “a bit of anime… but he still looks earnest!” Call me stupid, but it took Sakurai showing off the character model in great deal, via Brawl’s character viewer of course, it make me realize that the two rings on his arm were halos!

As for the animation, none of it was motion capture; all of the animation was done by hand. When it came to conveying the ideas that Sakurai had in his mind for moves, he took a Japanese toy called a micro-man, which is basically a small action figure that is super pose-able, put it in whatever pose, then took a picture. One of the pictures shown had the toy doing a fireball motion, and Sakurai was quick to point out “Sorry, but there are no Street Fighter characters in this game!” Or is there? Hmmm… Anyway, a separate figure was used for the female characters, but as Sakurai noted, the toy has oddly huge breasts.

Sakurai also pointed towards another design challenge when it came to translating certain character’s trademark moves from their games to Brawl, such as Snake’s crawling move, which was made less realistic (like it is in MGS) in order to emphasize the aesthetic of crawling, if that makes any sense. Sakurai also noted that shared moves had to be adjusted for the sake of uniformity, like how Mario and Samus both jumps in their games. And from this, Sakurai was able to extract intent from the designs of those games; as for why Samus jumps the way she does, its so the player can still aim and shoot in mid-air, whereas there’s no such concern with Mario. Long story short, to create the perfect balance, various elements such as a character’s speed and strength were translated into numbers, and those figures were constantly shifted and adjusted; if just one move from one character was changed, everyone else’s entire array of moves had to be re-considered. But it was also important to not get lost in the numbers, because the character’s essence was always of paramount importance.

And it was around then when Sakurai said a most curious thing about the design process; he’s a devote advocate of thinking before doing. He hates the attitude of “We’ll never know until we try. Which to be is pretty counter-productive, and hinders, among many other things, creativity. Someone you really don’t know till you try, and some of the best things are produced by accidents. I guess it’s a Japanese thing? But anyway…

The hour ended with Sakurai playing with four different characters, one at a time, showing off their differences, yet how they compliment each other. The most interesting character to hear about and see in motion was Sonic; because he’s a Sega guy, his move set is largely Virtua Fighter inspired, like P,P,P,K combos. Neat! Though also neat was seeing Snake using the sticky bomb not on just enemies, which are then detonated remotely, but on himself to prevent him from falling down below.

Next it was finally time for “Pouring Gas On The Flames” aka the GDC Game Designers Rant. It’s a chance for creative types to finally cut loose and say whatever is on their mind. Historically speaking, you have a bunch of folks on stage, screaming “FUCK!!!” into the microphone repeatedly, and every year one person says something particularly shocking that either gets them a lot of kudos or lots of flames, sometimes both. It may seem strange, but I had none of the apprehension going in as I did with the indie roundtable, because self-indulgent bullshit is pretty much what is advertised.

The thing was hosted by Eric Zimmerman from GameLab (naturally), who noted that 2007 was a great year, but there were still plenty of things wrong with the industry. And even though 2008 might just be the year of game design, which is good and all, its still not easy being a designer, and are still way down on the totem poll, somewhere between associate producer and lead texture artist when a game’s credits roll for example. So bunch of folks were brought together to explain how things could be better, and of them, three stood out. First was was Jane McGonigal from Advent Games, who claimed that game designers “own more emotional bandwidth than anyone else… we’ve won.” But she also asked, if we can rule the world, the virtual world, and because our games work better than the real world, why aren’t we “fixing” it? The bottom-line is that the real world sucks, and many people have precious little to get excited about, hence why games are often one of the few things that makes them happy and actually improves their quality of life (gotta say, the comment about entertainment being one of the things that makes some people happy is depressingly accurate). Which is why we must all make the real world work like a game, because after-all, “Games are the ultimate happiness engine.” She then rattled off some wacky concepts for real life games, such as taking the tech that combines Nike shoes and an iPod and putting it on her dog’s collar, so instead of just walking the dog, which hates doing, she can accumulate points for a RPG. Or something.

Then you had Clint Hawking from Ubi Soft who started off by going, with anger in his eyes and foam in his mouth: “We are pound for pound the most creative fucking industry in the world… so why don’t we make games that challenge people? We make all sorts of movies and books and paintings and songs that challenge people, why can’t we make a game that fucking means something?” and so on, and so forth. Which, you know, is cute and all, but coming from a dude from Ubi Soft, I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. NOTE: apologizes for not knowing who Hawking is… the dude worked on Far Cry, right? I’m sure he means well, and maybe he has some indie games under his belt that I have no clue about, but my point it, its like being told that Hollywood should be ashamed of itself for shitting out one brainless, big explosions but no soul summer blockbuster after another by the director of Transformers. Hence why his entire “rant” felt so forced and insincere.

When he stated “It sucks ass that we don?t do more that two dudes in a basement… we have code, we can do anything,? I almost started laughing. And yes, I know its poor form to say ill will about a former employer, but after talking with a bunch of ex-Ubi people at the conference, I have to ask: are there any former employees from Ubi Soft that’s NOT filled with piss and vinegar about their time there?

The third “rant” that stood out, and which was easily the best of the entire bunch, was Jonathan Mak’s. He only said three words: “Hit the music.” And with that, he literally ran off stage, some feel-good music started playing and a bunch of balloons were thrown in the air, which everyone bounced around…

… All the balloons had wacky sayings like WEIGHTED COMPANION BALLOON.?Oh, and there was a guy on-stage in Mak’s place, who pretended to address the audience, as if he was making some grand speech, but with nothing coming out of his mouth. Once the music was over, that guy left the stage, then Mak reappeared, but dragging Portal’s Kim Swift with him, who he then deposited in front of the audience, and then once again disappeared. At a loss at what she was supposed to do, Swift kinda just stood there going “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say…” and eventually decided to state that her ballon said FLAWLESS VICTORY and how she was maybe supposed to rant, but couldn’t, because she had nothing to rant about due to having such an awesome year herself. And that was pretty much it… simple and sweet. With far more heart and sincerity than that Hawking’s dude’s posturing.

Immediately after the hour, I spotted someone in the audience that I had long wanted to introduce myself to. Actually, I shit you not, when I first saw him and thought about approaching the dude, I almost got nervous! It was Scott Sharkey, whom most people know from Ziff Davis’ 1UP, but I remember the dude from his Solid Sharkey days, and truth be told, Scott was my primary inspiration when I started blogging about games, and his was the very first blog I ever read back during the halcyon days of the web, circa 1999. So it was nice to finally talk to the dude face to face, and he was more than a little impressed when I told him that I still have the Wily Kit/Wily Kat shirt that he made so many years ago. So yeah!

Afterwards was lunch and one last stroll though the expo, which is when I had a rather odd encounter with one particular Nokia rep (which can be read about here). Then I went off to check out a panel on how to make a compelling boss fight, which was immediately before on creating intuitive and immersive minigames, but there were just too many other people interested, and it was clear that I was not getting in. There was a roundtable called “What Would a Black, Latin, or Caribbean Game Really Look Like?” but it was later in the day, and around this point, which was 3-ish, I was totally spent and done with video games for the week. Though I did pop into the last few minutes of a roundtable on video game journalism. It was the same old, same old that I’ve heard plenty of times, which was why I didn’t take any notes, but I will say that Steve Totilo was funny as ever.

And with that, GDC 2008 was over…

… Which meant time to finally soak in San Fran, uninterrupted. But the sun was already starting to set, and since I knew the next day would be mostly rain, I had no time to waste.

Raina had said that I could always call her if I was on a random street corner and no clue where to go next, and that’s what I did. Actually, I sorta knew where I wanted to go… based upon her extensive email of stuff to check out from earlier in the week. But when I asked her the best way to walk towards “the REAL Chinatowns” in Richmond and Sunset, her response was “Ummm… you can’t walk there; there’s a mountain in the way.” Oh well. Instead, I went over to the gay district instead, and took a bunch of pics along the way, with the better ones being…

… Again, I’m pretty sure touristy pics of Shinjuku > touristy pics of San Francisco, but if anyone wants to see more, I’ll have them on Flickr someday. Anyway, Raina mentioned that good diner food could be found there, but what I was really in the mood for was a burrito from the Mission District, so there’s where I went next. Another thing I had heard was there the area can get sketchy late at night, which doesn’t mean much to a hardened New Yorker like myself. Still, it was foreign territory, so when I struck up a conversation with a random dude on the street, when I needed some help orienting myself, I went, by the way, I hear it can get kinda dangerous at night: confirm/deny? This response? “Watch your ass.” Yikes. But still… I had yet to have a killer story about some crazy encounter with a homeless person yet, so I went forth, bravely.

I eventually came across a small design and zine shop called Needles & Pens

… The girls working there were quite cool, and it was fun to flex my “hey, I’m from New York City” coolness for everything its worth. Though I think what impressed them the most was my selection of goods that I bought, specifically the last copy of Titty City.

It took a while, but I eventually found Raina’s fave La Taqueria, which was well worth the trek. Anyway, some random pics, from Mission Street, on the way home, including, LOCAL ART!

MONKEYS!

and KUNG FU CLASS!

I got back to my hotel, on foot, due entirely to the fact that I just could not figure out the mass transit system, albeit via a casual glance (as much as I bitch about the subway system in NYC, at least everything is nice and clear), just in time to watch pro-wrestling, but alas, my hotel did not get the CW, which is the only real negative I think. I had some pending invites to go out drinking or partying, but I was just too tired, and instead stayed in bed and watched Cartoon Network. I actually did find some classic wrasslin’, on ESPN2, but I ended up dozing off around 10. Hey, it was a long week.

Wonder Con & a HAPPY NEW YEAR!

It was my last day in San Fran, and I wanted to see all the sights that I had missed, which I knew were quite a few. But the weather was finally turning crappy as everyone had predicted, plus… Wonder Con was underway, right at the same convention center that the GDC took place, which meant it was just around the corner. So because everyone said I should check it out, I decided “what they hell” and did just that.

It was you basic, large-scale mainstream comic con, with plenty of comic books and regular books, like this collection of Phil Noto…

… But instead, I got a collection of comics featuring naked jungle chicks, gorillas, and Nazis.

There was also plenty of video games, like this one set-up that tightly packed in all sorts of games, new and old…

… In addition to Radiant Silvergun, Judgement Silversword, and Panzer Dragoon Saga, there was a sealed copy of Final Fight Revenge for $150, and if I had known it was going to be that sought after, I would have totally gotten one at the time of its release. Anyhow, I ended up getting the Twin Bee collection for the PSP; I have it on stick but just wanted a physical copy.

One game that was being pushed really hard was Professor Layton, which I actually got in Washington but have yet, even till now, to give it a spin. Aside from trucks going all over the city, they had this interactive floor that drove all the kids nuts…

Castle Crashers, by the same folks who did Alien Hominid, had a nice little booth…

… And here’s the lead artist for the game, Dan Paladin…

There were a few cosplayers floating around. For whatever reason, G.I. Joe had a strong presence…

This dude pulled off M.Bison/Vega quite well, despite the fact that facially he looks like that guy who played the child rapist in Happiness…

I guess Brain Age dude was a real hit, as evidenced by all the lipstick marks…

Easily my favorite from the whole show was the No More Heroes cosplay….

And two dudes who couldn’t wear their Kobun outfits due to the packed hallways…

A smoking Stalin bust, from Rotofugi

And some random sumo wrestler standee…

What comic con is complete with B/C level celebrities! Like Fat Momma from Who Wants To Be A Super Hero?

The self-appointed Queen Of Trash was on-hand, peddling comic books starring herself, and I simply had to take this picture since it features a naked chick covered in slime…

… If the girl in the comic was younger/more innocent looking (i.e. more “Hermione Granger-esque”), I totally would have bought ten copies. Her outfit also had DVDs available, including soft core dinosaur porn…

What comic show would be complete without Lou Ferrigno? One of the better things you could pay to have his John Hancock on…

Though the highlight of the show was running into, and having my picture taken with, the Red Power Ranger! I know I passed the pic along already in the forum, but once again…

… Once again, right when the Red Ranger was a topic of conversation, regarding him supposedly doing gay porn… yeah, different Red Ranger, but still!

And the rest of the trip is coming up, real soon!

  • phooky

    Paxton Gate is insane. It’s like Evolution on ‘roids.

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    I’ll be totally honest with you phooky; I have NO idea what you’re talking about.

  • Joel

    Funny…we have opposite reactions to Hocking and Mak during the rant.

    Hahaha….and yeah, Clint….change the industry! What did you work on last?
    I love what he said, but he needs to pull a Koster and actually go out and do what he’s ranting about.

    I saw the entire balloon thing as some sort of retarded inside joke gimmick.
    I was actually embarrassed for games.

  • https://www.fort90.com Matt

    Even though I don’t agree, I can still totally see where you are coming from, regarding the balloon thing. And truth be told, if the same exact stunt was pulled at MoCCA or SPX, I would also have a similar reaction, perhaps stronger.

    I guess in this instance… and I hate to pull out such a card, but maybe… I’m just still at that wide-eyed, idealistic stage, easily impressed stage? Not to say that you’re some grizzled, cynic that’s “seen all the bullshit this industry has come to embody.”

    Which is why Hawking, sorry, Hocking rubbed me off such the wrong way. Again, yeah, it’s easy to get demoralized and become bitter when the thing you love is treated like such crap, or being done poorly, yet rewarded handsomely, but at the end of the days, its still video games. Hence why I give angry, bitter game journalists the McDonald’s analogy.

    I probably would have been more turned off by Mak’s “rant” and written him off as some hipster douchebag if not for the fact that he did not come off as one at the state of indie roudtable a couple days prior. I would also like to think that it was designed to be a counter-point for the aforementioned douchebag before him, who did the typical “what an angry game designer is SUPPOSED to act like” shtick from three years ago.

  • http://www.dmauro.com dmauro

    That looks like it’s probably a Shotokan karate class rather than a Kung Fu class.

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