This is it; tonight’s the night.

For those of you who have been waiting patiently for my PAX East 2013 wrap-up, you’ll have to wait a bit longer. Till after I get back from Toronto and TCAF. But before that, there’s NYC and NYU!

I’ve been at the Game Center since Wednesday, trying to get the Attract Mode prints in order. Here they are, right after they arrived in the mail…

Thankfully they’ve been getting a decent amount of press, considering how “different” they are in comparison to most examples you see from most other art shows that pay tribute to games. So big thanks to Kotaku and Joystiq for helping to spread the word!

As well Destructoid, which actually highlighted both Attract Mode shows that’s happening. And speaking of, here’s all the goodies that myself and Adam will have for sale at the Bit Bazaar, which also just arrived in the mail, courtesy of our pals at Fangamer…

FYI: everything will also be available for sale during the Comics Vs. Games 2 opening as well. Though first thing’s first: if you’re in New York this evening and can swing by the 4th No Quarter opening, please do! Aside from all the pretty artwork to admire (and also buy), there’ll also be some awesome games to play as well. 16 player chess anyone?

Oh, and there’s also a mountain of free beer, courtesy of the evening’s sponsor, Brooklyn Brewery! BTW, don’t forget to RSVP. Though before heading back downtown, one last Comics Vs. Games 2 piece. In honor of the opening of Iron Man 3, I present Corey Lewis’ Iron Man X Mega Man mash-up (one of THREE pieces he’ll have in the show)…

Hopefully I’ll get a chance to see the new movie before heading up to Canada (though it’s not looking very likely).

Hey now. Figured an update was in order. Been meaning to file a PAX East 2013 report for weeks now, but it’s the same old song (though it’s mostly because of one last bit of unfinished business that I need to take care of first; sorry Steve for the wait).

But yeah, been legit busy as f*ck; along with orchestrating the aforementioned very first NYU Game Center X Attract Mode collab, I’m also putting together Comics Vs. Games 2. Then there’s secret project #3, which is not such a secret if you’re one of the many folks I’ve asked for help with finding an iOS programmer.

Anyhow, real quick: it’s my birthday! Which kicked off in a fairly awesome manner, thanks to well wishes from the voice of Daytona USA himself…

BTW, it’s today, not yesterday. But, you know, Japan (and them being 12 hours ahead). Anyhow, thanks SO MUCH for all the birthday well wishes thus far! It’s been sincerely appreciated. And keep ‘em coming; after the past couple of weeks I’ve been having, I seriously need the ego boost.

Also a nice stiff drink. Several actually. Which is how I’m celebrating the occasion, plus dinner with friends, all that jazz. Though the celebration will be raging all throughout the weekend, thanks to Subway Cinema and…

It all goes down at the Anthology Film Archives, where Subway Cinema first got its feet wet if I recall correctly. The first thing of theirs I went to was a Korean movie festival, that would eventually become the foundation of the New York Asian Film Festival, about 13 years ago I believe?

The entire schedule can be seen here. And there’s a lot to choose from, but my inside track tells me that the one movie to catch is The Dragon Lives Again. Here’s the official PR…

WARNING: Watching This Movie Will Destroy Your Brain!!!!! Four years after Bruce Lee died, everyone was cashing in on his legend with look-a-like films, but this is the most notorious Brucesploitation movie of them all. Bruce Lee is dead, but his adventures aren’t over. He arrives in Hell where he must fight Dracula, Clint Eastwood, and the Godfather in order to come back to life. Fortunately, Popeye is there to lend a hand. Bruce Lee is played by Bruce Leung (KUNG FU HUSTLE) but even his genuine skills can’t stop the madness. Beginning with the corpse of Bruce Lee getting an erection (Don’t worry – it’s just his nunchakus!) and ending with him flying away as the cast waves “Goodbye!”, you cannot unsee this movie. You will laugh! You will cry! And you will scream as the spirit of Bruce Lee kicks his way out of your stupid skull!

You know how I keep saying that I’m working on a bunch of different things, but have been super vague and cryptic? Well, I can finally reveal one of them…

… You can read all about it here. Get ready New York City; Attract Mode is coming back!

Once again, time is flying by at a breakneck pace; the 2013 edition of PAX East is just around the corner, which means the 2013 edition of my PAX East report will surely follow. But before that, some random Instagram pics from the past few few weeks, which I need to pass along before they’re officially in the way…

Corpse on the Imjin!

So last time I spoke about the first ever IndieCade East, though one key detail I forgot to mention was how Kris had asked to crash at my place and I had to tell him no. Why? Because it was cold as hell that week, and for whatever reason, the heat in my apartment was borked.

It was so bad that I seriously fired up Ted‘s Pixel Fireplace by my bedside, in hopes of convincing myself that I was sitting next to the real thing. Guess what? It worked…

Oh, so I’ve been busy has hell, putting two… things… together, back to back (will explain more in a bit, when the time is right), plus I’ve been designing an iPhone game, PLUS I’ve got more freelance work than I know what to do with. Which is why, among other things, I’ve barely left the apartment these past couple of weeks.

So one Saturday night I forced myself out, to finally check out Kyle‘s (not so new) apartment. Where I discovered a treasure chest of game controller. Literally…

I also got to finally meet Chums…

On my way home, while waiting for the G to arrive (Kyle lives in Greenpoint), I got bored and decided to take a subway selfie…

The following weekend, on my way to Mitsuwa, the old rundown house I always pass by looked especially creepy and decrepit (so naturally I had to take some pictures)…

As for Mitswua itself, while stocking up on the essentials (i.e. curry, curry, and more curry, plus this miso flavor salad dressing that is simply the best thing ever), I decided to swing by the candy section, where their karaoke themed sweets seemed might tempting…

As was this brand new line of sake they had on sale…

While on the topic of delicacies, have I mentioned that I get all my pearls of wisdom from Chinese fortune cookies?

I’ve mentioned Ventla once already, and recommend him to basically every chance I get. When people ask where to start, I always recommend Anti-Vivant…

Like most folk, I usually get bills or junk in my mailbox. But the day in which both the latest edition of Shooting Gameside and a print out of a Gothamist post both showed up on the same day was sorta exciting (for the story behind the latter, simply click here)…

Not long after, this showed up, which I’ve been eyeballing for ages now (and which I found on eBay for a crazy low price)…

… As for how it plays, I wouldn’t know! The drive door to my Xbox 360 is busted, so I haven’t been able to play the damn thing. Along with how my Wii’s OS is somehow corrupted (it took several days, but was able to finally download the definitive version of Retro City Rampage, the WiiWare edition) and how my PS3 can’t do jack on the internet, I sure do love how this generation of gaming has turned out!

Actually, I do know how the game is; been enjoying the iOS version since it first came out. Highly recommended! BTW, I don’t think I’ve ever shown off my Transformers Masterpiece edition of Soundwave, have I? Him, alongside Zero Suit Samus from before, is my pride and joy. Now, unlike Dodonpachi Daifukkatsu cost and an arm and a leg, and was worth every damn cent…

You know, I was afraid of showing him off, since the main reason why FORT90ZINE4ANSWER is in limbo is due to not having enough cash for print solution #7012. Let’s just say that he was acquired when my finances were a bit more stable, and was also one of those spur of the moment, “dear God I’m super depressed, maybe if I buy the one toy I’ve always wanted as a child, which they finally got around to making, 28 years later, I might cheer up, and besides, it is Christmas after-all” type of deals.

… Though, the latest financial headache comes in the form of a trucker from Pennsylvania, or at least that’s who I think it is. Long story short: Simon was in town, the other week, for a pre-GDC mixer in NYC, and I took him to my favorite Sri Lankan place for lunch. Problem is, I didn’t have any cash and the place did not accept cards. It’s also located in a place in which there are seriously no banks nearby, so against my best judgement, I decided to use one of those ATMs you use in the middle of the street in NYC. Which I always avoid, cuz, they look sketchy as hell. And wouldn’t you know, my paranoia was completely warranted; a few weeks later, a decent chunk of money was stolen from my bank account, to purchase diesel gas in Pennsylvania, hence the assumption that it was a trucker. Or so the theory goes; there’s no real proof that the ATM was actually rigged, but it’s the only wild card that would attributed to my credit card info getting jacked. There’s an investigation going on, and while I’ll get all my money back eventually, it’s still been a massive pain in the ass, and yet another reason why my bank account has been dangerously close to zero.

Anyway, back to Transformers: here’s a work in progress GPK card that Joe’s working on, featuring Sunstreaker, that I spotted when swinging by Wax Eye HQ this past Friday night…

It’s actually a commission; as a fully licensed and certified Garbage Pail Kids artist, he gets all kinds of wacky, personal requests. Like the following that he just recently wrapped up, featuring an Indiana Jones and Boba Fett mashup…

Together, along with June, we swung by the Society of Illustrators, for the Art of Harvey Kurtzman opening…

For those who aren’t familiar with Harvey Kurtzman, he’s basically one of the greatest cartoonists to have ever walked this earth and put pencil to paper. He’s up there with Will Eisner, Jack Kirby, and Art Spiegelman. In addition to highlighting Mad Magazine, which he created, the exhibit also showcases some of his Two-Fisted Tales tales output…

Along with Little Annie Fanny, which was a comic strip that ran in the pages of Playboy and that Kurtzman did alongside longtime collaborator Will Elder…

… That’s not Kurtzman btw, but Elder, along with a total hottie of a Playboy bunny. But anyhow, there’s not much to say here, other than how Kurtzman was truly one of a kind…

The retrospective is simply amazing, though also a tad bit depressing. Aside from the obvious (it’s sad that he’s not exactly a household name, even though his impact, not just on comics but entertainment in the past 50+ years across the board is more than evident), it also made me feel like a shlep for not drawing regularly these past 14 years.

Before I got involved in video games and writing, I was first and foremost a cartoonist. But that’s a discussion best saved for a later time.

“She’s attractive and is the size of an average human mother.”

Anyhow, time once again to pass along a few random game related links and images, just like the good old days! Starting with…

- Cory posted the following the other day on Twitter, of what he calls the 3DSi, and I want it pretty badly! At the very least, it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one who isn’t in love with the 3DS XL either (it’s better than the normal 3DS, but only marginally so)…

- And via Tumblr comes “a real man’s room”…

- Back to Ventla; he’s the one who passed along this…

- Yes, I totally follow a site whose URL spells out Let’s Go Lesbos (NSFW, perhaps obviously), but the most important thing is the following pic that was posted: does anyone know that game that she’s playing? It’s something for the PS2, that’s all I can tell…

- Well, I’m glad that horrible and gross looking “Pikachu” has a roof over its head…

- Corey (not Schmitz, but Lewis; note the extra “e”) says his Revengance fan art might be print soon. I hope so!

- I spotted the following on Rodney Greenblat‘s Facebook page I believe…

- Good news: Vanguard Princess has been translated, and it’s only $5! Bad news: it’s apparently censored, and it’s not getting a hold of the Japanese version, which is totally free, is all that hard.

- Even better news: Mamoru-kun might be coming to America! That’s sorta random.

- Hey, did you hear about how Darth Vader introduced Wicket the Ewok to video games? It’s totally true.

- I forget where I first saw this, or if I’ve ever passed this along before, but at any rate: check out the smallest ass Game Boy you’ve ever seen.

- This woman beating some dude in Soul Calibur, and without even looking at the screen is mighty impressive.

- Turns out, Leonard Nimoy not only has a PS4 already, but he’s had it for 30 years now.

- I totally want to play the rarest PSP game ever produced, which is all about being a Hilton hotel employee.

- This pretty much single-handedly sums up why I love the Yakuza games so much.

- In case you’ve forgotten: Sonic fans are quite insane.

- Exhibit #2…

- Am totally gonna nab this brand new Chie figure from Bandai, though I only wish I knew how big she is…

- Though even cooler is this Raidou Kuzunoha figure…

- Sorry, I forget who the artist is. But it’s a heartwarming scene, is it not?

- Though I know who did this rad Punch-Out illustration; Ed Piskor…

- I totally love these rejected Mega Man bosses by Anthony Clark that Tiny Cart posted the other day…

- I so badly need to make my own custom Radiant Silvergun arcade stick (from this site)…

- Hey look, Mortal Kombat pizza…

- Came across the follow the other night, while trying to figure out why I can’t get Kega Fusion to play any Sega CD redbook audio…

- Kris was the one who gave me the heads up on the race for the first 3D printed home. Don’t know about you, but I totally want to live in a house that looks like a Crocomire’s skull (a la Super Metroid)…

- Anyone out there familiar with 8-Bit Zombe?

- Though the real big news from the past couple of weeks is sudden and untimely passing of Kenji Eno. Before I began idolizing the works of Masaya Matsuura, Fumito Ueda, Goichi Suda, and even Keita Takahashi, I was a total fanboy of the guy who made Enemy Zero (the absolute greatest survival horror game ever made), who told Shigeru Miyamoto right to his face that he thought Mario 64 kinda sucked (Shiggy was extremely grateful for such brutally honest criticism), and who totally punk’d Sony at their own presser (instead of announcing a new game for their PlayStation, he stopped on the console and a toy based upon Jumping Flash; God I wish video of that existed).

This recently published interview that had long been unpublished, courtesy of Kotaku, is a must read. But before that, and especially if you haven’t check it out already, this epic, 10 page long interview from 1UP is absolutely required. Especially now that 1UP’s days are numbered.

Which is why you should also not just read, but download, their incredible retrospectives on Panzer Dragoon and Shenmue, plus one of the best interviews with Tetsuya Mizuguchi you’ll find anywhere.

A Couple More Things…

K, time to wrap this up. But first, a few Attract Mode posts, since last time…

- At long last, your long overdue Nintendo World Championships 1990 recap.

- Part three of Lil B and his “classic” video game collection.

- And my most recent Instagram dump, featuring a heavy dose of cats…

… And two final PAX East 2013 notes: remember how I said that I would be moderating a panel? Well, there’s now a time and a place! You can find out, plus more, via its homepage. Yes, the panel has its very own site! That’s just how we roll.

Also, for those of you who plan on going to Boston via the Chinatown bus, please note that the Fung Wah is no more. So I’d suggest getting tickets sooner than later!

Five days into March already and I still haven’t finished covering February. Anyway, after Toy Fair, you had…

IndieCade East

IndieCade, aka “the video game word’s equivalent to Sundance” is something I’ve long wanted to witness firsthand. Unfortunately, making it out to California has always been on the difficult side for me. Hell, I have yet to even attend E3.

Though you better believe it when I say that I’ll be in town for the LA Game Space opening shindig! Plus a trip to Los Angeles is now officially overdue, now that I have so many friends who live there; sup Lamar. Which is why, when I heard that IndieCade was happening in NYC, I was beyond stoked. And the final verdict? Well… I always try to be kind when it comes to anything’s first time.

More than anything else, the extremely healthy turnout for the very first IndieCade East, despite relatively little to almost zero advertising, is a testament to how thriving the world of indie video games is here in the Big Apple. And how hose who are directly involved, along with others who are simply on the other side of the fence, are both eager for the chance to learn from each other.

IndieCade East was a three day affair that took place at the Museum of Moving Image, which is without question one of the most underrated institutions in the entire city (though I’ve yet to fully forgive them for their retrospective of New York City cable access from two years ago, which was a bit an epic fail as they come). Alas, due to my schedule, I was only able to go Saturday and Sunday.

My primary goal on day one was to catch Kris‘s keynote. Though equally high on my list was to check out was the game jam, and that’s what I hit first…

Various teams were all busying putting stuff together with the PlayStation Mobile SDK; Sony was the sponsor. Among the familiar faces was Team Donut Goku, aka Emmett and Diego, the duo behind Heads Up! Hot Dogs, plus their gal pal Nina. Here’s what their game was looking like at that point, day two…

You controlled this cute little pink robot who had to plant one of two different flowers, per instructions from a computer. The flora would grow automatically and I think you had to perform actions to keep things under control, though it wasn’t clear what.

Team Donut Goku were still trying to figure stuff out, like all the other teams, but it was beyond super cute and I had high hopes that they’d win the grand prize! At any rate, I wasn’t the one who was impressed…

Elsewhere you had a showcase of games from past IndieCades. Including Dyad, Hokra, and Splice…

You also had Bloop, which I never got the chance to try out, though everyone else seemed to enjoy it…

Was delighted to finally experience Thirty Flights of Loving. Though, I believe the PC that was running it was overheating, or perhaps I encountered a bug, because my character at one point picked up an orange that he wasn’t supposed to. Didn’t know that, so I spent all this time offering it to various characters with zero effect…

One of the star attractions of the weekend was the Oculus Rift, which I had already test driven at CES (actually, I wanted another go, but the line was always too damn long). So instead, I checked out the Ouya. Long story short: it seriously sports the most comfortable controller ever. Even beating out the GameCube’s!

Eventually it was finally time for the aforementioned keynote. It was basically Kris detailing CAPY’s “hidden history”, the days before Critter Crunch, Might and Magic: Clash of Heroes, and Sword & Sworcery, which was a long and winding road to put it mildly…

Before those aforementioned games, which everyone knows and loves, put the studio on the map, there were countless others that have long been forgotten. The presentation was a fascinating and detailed look back at CAPY’s early, awkward steps towards future greatness…

Most intriguing of all were the games that CAPY has willingly chosen to forget about themselves…

Equally fascinating was hearing about the epiphany that Kris had, which came at a time in which CAPY was barely about to stay afloat. And as a consequence, was struggling to find itself…

Fun-fact: GDC 2008 was where I first met CAPY. I was one of the judges for IGF Mobile, its very first year, which has since been dissolved and incorporated into the rest of the IGF. I remember playing Critter Crunch on a BREW (or was it J2ME?) handset and how it was my top pick of mobile game of the year. Then later meeting Nathan on the show floor; I wouldn’t become pals with Kris till some time after…

Unfortunately, at this point was when Kris was told to wrap it up, even though he had a LOT left to go through. Given how much work he had put into his presentation, it was both heartbreaking and downright annoying. These last couple were flashed super fast like…

The reason why I haven’t gone crazy with the details (and I did take some fairly extensive notes) is because I’m mostly hoping Kris will re-tell his story, over at Attract Mode! Because I’m dying to know how it all ends.

But yeah, the keynote flub was definitely a huge disappointment. Unfortunately, the evening was far from over; afterwards was Night Games, which again was again designed to showcase past IndieCade offerings, with the key distinction here being that they were mostly party games.

First you had Roaming Gnomes, which required 30 players, all working together in teams. It just seemed so complicated and way too involved, which scared everyone away; people at that point just wanted to scope things out, and not become immediately tied down to the first thing they had stumbled across. Was told that not a single session actually took place all evening…

Searchlight definitely seemed cool. Unfortunately, it never got up and running due to some kind of malfunction…

Next you had Yamove, which again, was unplayable due to technical difficulties. I was fortunate enough to be given a complimentary press pass, and to be totally honest, if I had instead paid to attend Night Games (which required its own entrance fee, separate from the rest of the show), I probably would have been hella pissed since half the games were not working.

There was actually one game that was running just smoothly, or so I heard: Renga, which was in one of the theaters. But because so many other games were not functional… and because they only allowed a single session… was never able to give it a shot. Frustrating to say the least.

So to kill time, I went upstairs, where a separate video game exhibition was taking place. One that spanned a wide variety of software and hardware. On the plus side was the messed up Star Wars Arcadde game, which as noted previously, looked a lot like Rez! Still, would have been nice to have the real thing showcased, instead of of its limp-dicked sequel…

Thankfully, the IndieCade showcase was still up and running. Those who were unable to get a piece of Roaming Gnomes, Searchlight, Yamove, or Renga had at least BaraBariBall to keep them occupied…

Actually, there were two Night Games that one could actually partake in, and with no fuss or muss. First, Rakete, which again required a large groupe of people, to control a single space ship (but its theater was somewhat easy to miss, hence why it was never at capacity)…

And Hit Me!, which is all about trying to slap the button on the other person’s helmet, while also maintaining eye contact. Basically required two friends who secretly have beefs with each other that they can draw upon…

So yeah, Night Games, kind of a bust. Though, as bad I felt for those who had paid to get in, I felt ten times worse for those who games were on hand and which were not played, regardless of the reasons.

The highlight of the next day, the last day to be exact, was all the game jam game makers showing off their blood, sweat, and tears (plus lack of sleep) from the previous 48 hours. And there some really good stuff! Like Don’t Wake the Bear by Team Backpedal Games; it’s a party game in which you try to apply silly crap on a sleeping bear, in hopes of not waking him up. Imagine hot potato, but using a PlayStation Vita…

BTW, that’s not some weird filter I’m using; there was even technical difficulties during the jam showcase. Sometimes the projected image would be all pink, or there would be no sound. You couldn’t help but feel horrible for the teams who had busted their asses to produce the best game possible in such a short time frame, only to have the big reveal be totally ruined, and in such a lame manner.

Moving on: another favorite was Team Donut Goku’s final product from the jam, which had become decidedly more sophisticated since I last saw it, like the addition of variable weather and new goals …

Quite a few games were made that weekend, some better than others, though overall, the quality was excellent for any game jam (which can be super hit or miss). Not only was time a huge hurdle for everyone, but so was the PSMobile SDK itself, which apparently was a real pain in the ass to use. In the end, four games were chosen as semi-finalists; the grand prize would not only be published by Sony, but the team would have a Vita license for an entire year!

Hence why I wanted Team Donut Goku to win; not just because I felt they deserved to, but so I could then try to convince them to do a port of JizzMoppa. Alas, they did not make the final four, nor was I thrilled with many of the choices. At least Team Backpedal Games nabbed a slot, which counts for something.

Anyways, that was IndieCade East 2013. By no means a perfect weekend, though as already noted, the most important thing is how people came out to show support for such a thing, and who thankfully were forgiving enough to not mind the rough edges. But next time might be a different story; hopefully the event organizers will take the necessary steps to iron them out for IndieCade East 2014, which I’m already willing to wager will indeed be bigger and better.

PlayStation 4

I was indeed present for the big PlayStation 4 “unveil”. And there’s honestly not a whole lot to say that hasn’t been said already. But still…

- The level of excitement amongst game journalists leading up to the event is hard describe. Once it had sunk in that Sony was actually going to introduce to the world the PlayStation 4 in February and in New York City (hey, I believed it too), everyone went bonkers. Equally hard to properly articulate was the precise moment after the show was over; the sense of deflation in the Hammerstein Ballroom was deafening. I remember this one reporter, who sat right next to me going: “That’s it? That’s seriously it?! They’re not even going to show the damn system?!?!” Was kind of hilarious.

- Going back, starting from the top actually: it was a real thrill seeing Mark Cerny and David Perry in the flesh and on stage, two men whose work I greatly admire. The former not only made Marble Madness when he was just 18, but we would go on to helm Sonic 2 and basically had a hand in every major first/second party platformer for Sony; Crash, Jak & Daxter, Spyro, Ratchet & Clank. And the later made some of my fave Genesis games, like Cool Spot, Aladdin, plus Earthworm Jim. Too bad they were basically trotted out on Sony’s behalf to apologize to developers, for making the PS3 so god damn hard to make games for.

- Like many folks, I’m less than thrilled with Sony’s insistence that people’s online identities become more transparent. Does everything have to be connected to Facebook? That being said, I can’t figure out who is who on my PS3/Vita buddy list (for whatever reasons, people who are usually consistent with their online personas all went with some wacky other name on PSN). Though I mostly found it hilarious how, later on in the evening, we got two separate game demos (Infamous: Second Son and Watch Dogs) that are all about the evils of Big Brother.

- The idea of steaming your PS3 library, in leu of hardware driven backwards compatibility, is intriguing. As is the idea of also having PSone & PS2 games available in the same manner. But most figure that Sony will not be able to effectively determine which old games you already own, and henceforth simply charge for everything all over again (just like Nintendo). Though considering how Sony is unable to give me a steady enough connection to watch old episodes of Next Gen, or how a modest 15 meg update takes seriously an hour to download, I have zero confidence, and therefore interest, in their next-gen online initiative.

- Of all the people to hit the stage, I was most excited to see Jonathan Blow, even more so than Cerny and Perry. Hey, I can’t stand almost anything that comes out of his mouth, but the guy knows how to make a good game. The Witness got me the most excited that evening. Swear to God, I’ve watched the trailer on YouTube about 50 times now, easily (and am now a fan of the Mediæval Bæbes, who did the song).

- Conversely, no one pissed me off more than David Cage. Christ that guy is such a douche; I’m so sick of his embarrassment with the medium of games. The dude desperately wants to makes movies, and since he clearly could never cut it in Hollywood, we’re stuck with him as a result. Splendid.

- I wasn’t there at E3 when Nintendo gave everyone in the attendance douchechills with their Wii Music demo, but I imagine it being awfully close to the sensation everyone felt with the Media Molecule/PlayStation Move demo.

- I seriously can’t believe that there was no Gran Turismo 6. But even more shocking was the total lack of the KOJIMA!

- Thoughts on the PS4′s controller? I’m cool with it. Nice to see that Sony didn’t do away with the venerable Dual Shock design, much like when they tried with the PS3. The boomerang, anyone?

- Thoughts on the PS4 console being a total no show? lulz. And what do I think it’ll look like? I’m with Cory:
“it will probably be a black rectangle.”

… But seriously, what were people expecting? Did they honestly believe that Sony would give ALL the goods? Of course not; the holidays are still far away, plus they need to hold back at least something for E3. Still, many of the reporters I spoke with were pissed, mostly the ones from out of town, who had to go through the hassles of securing a ticket, then booking a flight, hotel, and so on. Many stated that they wished that they had just stayed at home and watched the livestream.

Afterwards was the cocktail hour, filled with frazzled journalists trying their best to make a story out of nothing (there was zero developers in sight; they were all at a separate shindig, which is somewhat telling of Sony). Hence why everyone interviewed each other; I think I’m in like three different wrap-ups. Though without question the biggest highlight of the entire evening was when some girl from Portugal who was dressed up as Lara Croft. She had a camera guy with her, and when wanted to know if she could ask me a question.

I figured it would again be what I thought of the PS4′s future. Instead she asked who I thought was the hottest video game girl. And my answer? Chie Satonaka of course. And because I was so piss drunk at the time, I went extra in depth, to the point that I believe Lara was taken aback. Either that or perhaps I was supposed to say Lara and didn’t follow the script. Anyhow, perhaps one day it’ll show up on YouTube? I hope to God not.

For those who missed part one, here ya go. Now, where was I? Oh yeah, the Kid Robot booth…

The highlight in my book was their second series of Street Fighter Mini Series…

Naturally, Sakura was my favorite…

From small to big; here we have Daft Punk, super colossal Bearbrick form…

Because the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers are celebrating its 25th anniversary, they could be found all over the place. And in some cases, lending a hand; here’s one helping a Toy Fair attend who had just dropped his bag…

In addition to toys, one could find all manner of games. And based on pretty much anything you can think of, including meat…

Not surprisingly, Angry Birds was all over the place, and in some cases, worked into board games. Though some interpretations made a little more sense than others…

Here’s a dude building a crazy tall stack of cards…

And just 30 seconds later…

… K, not really; that last pic was done at the very end of the show, as everyone was packing their bags. Alas, I missed the destruction of the house of cards, which would have been totally Vine-worthy (been struggling to find something good for it).

Laser was the one board game that caught my eye the most. It’s like chess, combined with that one scene in Raiders of the Lost Ark. You know which one I’m talking about…

Skylanders had another massive booth this year. I actually got the chance to check out the new game, plus their modular pieces that are part of the package. Their character designs, as reflected in these giant statues, are pretty spiffy…

Unfortunately, the dancing cat that you plug your portable music device into was not on-hand, due to some kind of shipping issue. So I only have this pic from its booth…

So, I was dating this girl for a little while not, which has since fizzled out, because of her I am now educated in the ways of Doctor Who, so I now care about (and am knowledgable about) related merch…

Speaking as a hardcore 007 nerd, one who totally loves Moonraker (which other Bond fanboys look down upon), I’m way into this replica of its space rifle…

What Toy Fair report is complete without at least one Gundam pic?

Here we have the Chogokin King Robo Mickey & Friends that got a lot of people on the internet when it was first announced…

Not sure what the deal is with these Disney (plus Muppets) characters as cupcake heads, but I found them fairly endearing…

And not too far away you had these dolls that combine Presidential figures and classic movie monsters…

If you’re gut reaction is “who the hell buys such things?”, you’re not alone. But the answer, as it turns out, is Tim Burton…

Each passing year you see more and more My Neighbor Totoro tie-ins. Which is not a complaint btw!

Though we could definitely use more Porco Rosso tchotchkes…

I can’t wait to get my hands on this Miyazaki-bot statue…

Astro Boys…

Who else has been enjoying 2013′s early contender for game of the year, aka Metal Gear Rising? Anyhow, here’s Raiden!

For those who haven’t heard, threeA now has the Marvel license. I just hope their takes on Spider-Man and Iron Man are somewhat along the lines of these guys…

Meanwhile, at the Square-Enix booth, which had such poor lighting that I gave up after struggling to take just one pic, of this rather gaudy looking Batman in some ultra wacky (and super Japanesesque) looking armor…

The Dark Horse booth had some really decent Mass Effect statues…

Along with everyone’s favorite little guy from Game of Thrones…

Not sure if these posters were promoting the stuff pony featured in each pic, or the clothing that the Korean kid is wearing, or the Korean kid himself. All I recall is that the booth was manned by a fan white dude who appeared somewhat drunk…

When I asked about Boo, the proclaimed “world’s cutest dog”, the guy man its booth gave a whole tongue in cheek explanation imaginable, and he too I believe was inebriated (which means I still don’t really know the whole story)…

Attention Joe and June: there’s now an iOS app that’s based upon the guessing the outcomes of America’s Funniest Home Videos!

And finally, the one thing that impressed me the most at Toy Fair 2013: Romo by Romotive…

But instead of me explaining why he’s so cool, just watch the following video, which does a far better job that I ever could…

Romo seriously blew me away, especially how it does allow small kids to do rudimentary programming. And given how many parents these days are giving their kids their old iPhones and iPod Touches, I’m hoping Romotive finds great success (I sure as hell am getting one)!

And I guess that’s it? Next up: my IndieCade East and PlayStation 4 unveil recaps.

Jesus, it’s March already?

So Toy Fair 2013. It was a lot like Toy Fair 2012, as in, the show is not nearly as exciting as it was once was. But aside from the fact that it’s mostly the same old same old, the really good stuff was all held behind closed doors.

It used to be the place where you not only found out what would be on Toy R Us shelves later that year, but what you’d also be seeing at the movies, since actions figures and associated goods need to be made (and distributed) in advance. And while it’s still an industry only affair, and they just don’t let anyone with a blog inside, the internet has drastically changed how business is conducted, hence the amping up of secrecy.

Seriously, the most noteworthy thing was getting sucker-punched by Sonic plushie vendor. But I still managed to get a few neat pics of stuff. Including the very first thing that greeted me when I first set foot…

Giant mecha Batman was part of the Funko booth, which is where internet celebrities are immortalized in the form of vinyl toys and bobble heads, even if their fifteen minutes are officially up…

Sometimes you see things that people have long stopped giving a rat’s ass about (like KISS) glom onto others things that are still popular (like Hello Kitty), in a desperate and transparent attempt to remain semi-relevant…

Back to Batman, across the way was the NECA booth, where they had this insanely detailed Adam West as Batman figure…

Next to him was Michael Keaton, aka the BEST Batman ever, even better than Christian Bale, sorry kids…

NECA excels in re-creating famous faces from famous scenes, in pint-sized, collectable format…

ED-209 here is just as accurate as the rest of the gang, except he’s but not nearly as creepy…

I guess there’s some Gremlins 2 fans out there, aside from myself. Hopefully they’ll be interested in getting these two, cuz I sure as hell am not…

NECA also makes assorted toys based on games, which I’ve highlighted in the past. By far their best offering on that end this year was this replica of Bioshock Infinite‘s Motorized Patriot…

Not sure if it’s a mistake or something, but their take on Iron Man’s mark 7 suit (note the color of the bottom half of his jaw) is a VAST improvement on the original design…

Meanwhile, over at the Kotobukiya booth, they had their Iron Man mark 8 figure on display, and the abundance of gold doesn’t look half bad up close (where it looks gawky as hell elsewhere)…

When it comes to Femsheps, do you prefer redheads or brunettes?

Sucks to hear that Dead Space 3 is such a stinker since I loved the first two, plus survival horror on Hoth always seemed like a good idea. At least bundled up Isaac still looks kinda cool…

Another Toy Fair, another Tekken Tag Tournament 2 figure…

So Han and Leia had a daughter and she turned out both hot and anime…

Nothing says summertime more than a ice box filled with beers that have been chilled by gigantic, Star Wars shaped ice cubes…

Across the way at another booth was something I had long wished for: a pizza cutter that’s themed like R2-D2 and even makes noises like him when making slices…

I found this Twitter mug fairly cute, especially the hashtag handle…

So the one booth that I went absolutely gaga for was the Magnote booth, which was filled to brim with all sorts awesome papercrafts from Japan…

Some of them incorporate pieces of wood, like the rapper here, plus the guy with the ray gun and surrounded by cats…

At one point I ran into Steve Flack and his crew. Here he is, trying to learn the ins and out of competitive cup stacking.

… Steve ended up doing fairly well! Though he has a ways to go before he reaches her level.

And here’s everyone checking out kinetic sand, which is basically regular sand, but treated with some kind of futuristic process that makes all the grains stick together, so kids can make sand castles indoors without also making a mess. Weird is perhaps the most apt description…

And here we are, watching some guy riding a super teeny-tiny surf board that’s supposed to work on hard surfaces. He like wiped out twice during the demo…

Another nice little corner of the show floor was The Loyal Subjects booth, who had these rather neat Transformers vinyl figures (sorry for the piss poor lighting, but it’s always a pain in the ass at Toy Fair, which makes no sense, since half the people are there to take pictures)…

Even better was their line of shirts. Such things are fairly common, but these are something I’d actually wear!

They even do Canzo Empyrean figures…

Lego Titanic. Lego dead/frozen poor people not included…

And that’s maybe enough pics for one post. To be continued tomorrow!

It’s been another crazy week; Toy Fair recently wrapped up, and the very first IndieCade East just kicked off. I’ll pass along reports for both when I have the time, but real quick, some clarification on something that happened at the former that you might have heard about.

So here’s the deal: I was going down the aisles of the Jacob Javits when a sign caught my eye. It was for a Sonic The Hedgehog plushie that allows you to roll him up as a ball. Which I thought was pretty neat! After all, half the time in his games, he’s all curled up. So I decided to investigate.

The booth was manned by one guy, who was in the middle of a conversation. I looked around for a sign that said no photographs but didn’t see one. And there it was, the toy in question. So I took the following picture…

… And immediately got punched in the back. At first I had no idea what hit me. I turned around and saw the guy (who was now by himself) ask, “Excuse me?” It’s not often I get sucker punched, so I was literally dumbstruck.

At first I thought it was an accident and his words to me were along the lines of “Oops, I didn’t see you there!” I looked around for some kind of object, like a pole, that would have caused the jabbing sensation. But it became immediately clear that what he was trying to say was “What the fuck are you doing?”

The dude demanded to know who had given me permission to take a picture. Again, I was totally stunned by what was happening, so I blurted out “Umm, no one, I suppose” or something to that effect. He then immediately began screaming “What the fuck is your problem?!?!” and the such.

I told him to call down and that there was no need to lay a hand on me. But when attempting to explain that I was simply a journalist, that’s when he got right in my face and I honestly thought that he was going to deck me.

“Listen asshole, I hear that bullshit all the time, from people trying to pull a fast one on me!” From the corner of my eye I could seem people in the booth next door, looking on, wondering what the hell was happening.

Again, I explained what I was doing, and that there was absolutely no reason for assault. I think the “a” word is what caused something to click inside his brain, and he apologizes. But it was clearly a half-hearted “I’m in big trouble here, gotta try to cover my ass”.

He stated that he was having a bad day or that he allowed his emotions get the better of him. Whatever. Still not much of an excuse. His name Tom Deluca, and he works for Fabrique Innovations Inc (at least he gave me his card when I asked for who he was). I think he’s the president of the company? What a douche.

BTW, my favorite reaction to the incident…

Again, will have my full rundown of Toy Fair 2013 sometime next week. In the meanwhile, and as mentioned last time, the episode of the Fangamer Podocast in which I talk about the time I tried making a dating sim for a New Jersey mobster and filled it with tons and tons of hot dog references is now available for download!

Time for part two of what’s been going on. And again, there’s been a lot of ground to cover…

GOTEVEN

Once Vegas was finally history, I was eager to get back to work on a couple of major projects that had just gotten underway, once the new year began, and which I had to put on hold for the aforementioned trip.

But I also mentally spent and needed to blow off some serious steam. And since I also hadn’t seen certain friends in ages, I decided to finally play some D&D with the Demin Club posse, aka Joe (Salina), Dave, Peter (Kassel), and Peter (Berkman)…

Actually it was Castle Ravenloft, a board game variant of D&D. And the following night was the Golden Globes at Wax Eye HQ, where plenty of Joe (Simko)’s patented deviled eggs were served, along with the usual assortment of candy flavored booze…

The thing is, I’ve been getting together with Joke and June ever year since forever to watch (and drunkenly heckle) the Oscars. But this year. they’ll be in Virginia, where the Wax Eye warehouse is located (it’s June’s dad’s birthday or something). Plus Joe is boycotting the show anyway, due to his intense dislike of Seth McFarlane, which I completely sympathize with.

So to “fill the void”, we’ve been catching whatever else award ceremony that happens to be on. The Golden Globes were okay, but no Oscars, that’s for damn sure. At least it was better than the Screen Actor’s Guild. Though the best thus far as been the K-Pop music awards. Here’s some dude whose attire makes him look like M. Bison if someone selected him with his alternate pink duds. Hence “K Bison” as Henry dubbed him…

In addition to enjoying the company of dear friends, it’s almost been a time to remember those who are no longer with us. As noted in my 2012 recap, one of the biggest reasons why last year sucked so much is that I had four people I know pass away. And alas, 2013 kicked off with the death of Daniel Craft.

Perhaps you’ve heard of the guy; he’s that Star Trek superfan whose dying wish was to see the new J.J. Abrams movie. The wish was granted, and just two days later, he passed away. You can read more about it here. Anyhow, his memorial service not only celebrated Daniel’s life, but his love of Trek…

I met Daniel via the New York Asian Film Festival; he was one of their key organizers behind the scenes. Such an awesome guy; there was a ton of overlap, as far as our views on movies went. If he was still around, he’d be at the top of my list of people I’d show GETEVEN, which finally arrived after many long weeks (not surprisingly, it takes almost forever for anything to arrive from Australia)…

I am happy to report that it is as mind-blowingly _______ as I had hoped it would be! And speaking of stuff in the mail, I’m in the process of re-organizing stuff and I came across the following that I should have shared ages ago, cuz it was sent some time ago, by someone who’s a big fan of the blog. Thanks Jonathan!

The Vegas trip was the conclusion was a fairly hectic past couple of weeks, which included the holidays, and even though I still have a ton on my plate, it’s been a chance for life to get back to normal. In addition to some much needed housecleaning, I also finally got the chance to do some Japanese food shopping at Mitsuwa.

And right next door is the magazine shop; as I love the Japanese cuisine, it’s their world of print that I adore even more so…

And as awesome as their magazines on cars and fashion might be, it’s the ones on pets that rule supreme…

I decided to take my 3DS on the trip with me, and these are the kids of Miis you’ll encounter in Jersey…

Everyone always asks what I’ve been playing, and the answer as usual is “lots”. Including Tokyo Crash Mobs, which can be best described as the perfect mix of Magnetica/Zuma and Mulholland Drive…

I’ve also been super addicted to DoDonPachi Maximum. It’s filled to the brim with “HOLY SHI-” moments for all the Cave fanboys out there (especially the ending)…

So another major highlight from the past few weeks has been all the Concrete TV I’ve been indulging in. For those who aren’t familiar, it’s basically one of the finest things you’ll find on New York cable access. The two latest episodes were world premiered at a gathering in Williamsburg, and of course I was there…

There I finally got the chance to meet the creator, Ron Rocheleau, and also acquire the entire series on DVD! Ron was also kind enough to throw in a t-shirt for free…

I’ve actually since hung out with Ron. Here we have where the magic happens, the set-up used to create his show, which is entirely pieced together with two Super VHS decks and that’s it. No computers, no fancy editing software…

BTW, KKK here is not what you think might be. It’s actually for Kustom Kar Kamandos, which is a film by Kenneth Anger. It’s basically the name given for his master tape for car crashes…

Behold Ron’s pile of tapes in which he has yet to pull footage from…

Along with his pile of stuff that has been gone through already (note the Olsen Twins tapes, which formed the bulk of one of his latest episodes)…

Finally, an episode being pieced together!

Moving on, meet mai new waifu. Whom I aqired from the nicest eBay seller on earth, aka my new best friend in Japan, as previously noted…

Elsewhere on my toy and figurine shelf; my Miyazaki robot, whose legs are crazy sensitive, yet has been erect 1 week now! Sorry, am so happy with this that I had to share…

And check out what else showed up in the mail! And yes, I am going to be at TCAF 2013. More details on that to come!

As of this writing, it’s Saturday night and I’m home. Would have loved to have gone out, but in addition to taking care of stuff that pertains to the aforementioned major projects (there’s three major ones in total), I’m also sick. Due to Nemo, which is also the reason why I totally forgot about the Girl Scouts Cookie Truck that was rolling around town yesterday (though the blizzard cuts things short anyway). And I was really hoping to get a box of Samoas for Mathew…

Last night was another evening at Wax Eye HQ, to work on yet to be unannounced project #3, plus to enjoy some freshly based cookies, berry flavored beer, and GETEVEN. Which was when the snow really came down. The following was taken on my way home; 2AM is basically the absolute best time to enjoy a storm in NYC…

… Though the trip back, mostly the long ass wait for the train, is why I have a cold. Oh well. At the very least, it’s affording me the chance to play catch up a tiny bit…

“‘WE’ ARE THE TRULE LOVERS OF THE GAMING WORLD!!”

Another question that comes up fairly often (and which is flattering to say the least, since it means people actually cared about such) is why I haven’t done a video game link/image dump in ages. All I can say is that I’ve been super busy! As a result, the TextEdit doc where I deposit all the links that I come across and save for later is basically 30 pages long! Unfortunately, I’m still on the busy side, so till then, here’s a few of the more pressing ones…

- So the $500 Metal Gear Rex from 3A is finally out! And… I’m kinda glad I didn’t bother. Because, at least going by the pics these assortment of pics, I am not a fan of the paint job.

At least you can make your own out of Legos! Too bad the following actually costs $900 to put together.

Thankfully, Slonie tells me that he’s going to pass along his spare Metal Gear Rex papercraft from the MGS3 E3 announcement packet! You can find pics from this German blog.

- I love how Steve, when letting me know about the Sega Daughters DLC for Samurai & Dragons went “I know you have to be aware of this already, but if there is anything more Matt Hawkins than this, I don’t know what it is.” BTW, I find Sega Saturn-tan to be cutest.

I also can’t wait for the requisite fan art, with Mega Drive 1 making out with Mega CD 2. May as well ad Super 32X and make it a threesome! BTW, various Sega games are also going to be added to the mix, like Burning Rangers, Roommania #23, and Fighting Vipers! Wait, no Cosmic Smash?

- Didn’t anyone else notice, from the Bayonetta 2 portion of the latest Nintendo Direct, the hella baller glasses that the female Platinum Games employee was wearing?

It’s the same frames that her chief rival Jeanne wears, for those who haven’t played the first game yet, FYI.

- Check out this cute little 4koma that Super Mario Broth recently posted.

And on a related note, something that GamOvr posted (which I can most certainly relate with at times).

Also, courtesy of Zack’s Tumblr, which am pretty sure I posted this ages ago, but whatever right? BTW, if you’re just like this girl, email me at matt at fort90 dot com plz.

… Sorry, but better put the wacky random links and pics to a rest, otherwise I’d be here all night! So how about we move onto recent Attract Mode posts that you may have missed? Like…

- I’m wondering if it’s worth the hassle of upgrading to Photoshop CS6 or is I should just stick to the Famicom version.

- Perhaps you’ve heard of the Press Paws art show? Which is happening right now in LA!

- Did you know that Masaya Matsuurahas a Soundcloud?

- In case you haven’t heard, Zac Gorman’s entire run of Magical Game Time comics is now available for sale! Dude needs the money to help fix is Mac, so help a brotha out.

- As much as I love messed upon 8bit pixels, screwed up 32bit polygons are far cooler.

- Blip Festival is officially no more.

- And my most recent Instagram dump for Attract Mode.

FYI, I have a new round coming up, first thing Monday morning.

- Oh, so there’s one AM blog post that I want to do but simply am not able to; a recent expose on the life and death of the American arcade that The Verge recently did reminded me of this awesome SNL sketch from the early 80s.

It was a mocumentary about video game addiction that I wish I could post, but YouTube won’t let me upload the damn thing, due to NBC Universal’s copyright claim. Which wouldn’t piss me off if I could instead link to it from Hulu, but it’s nowhere to be found.

Instead, was going to pass along the following clip starring Lilly Tomlin, but because I’m afraid that it might be a too old and obscure for the Attract Mode audience, here is here…

… Anyhow, even more odds and ends; stuff that I’m working on, alongside the three secret things I hope to reveal very soon…

- So I recently reviewed Noobz for Kotaku. Long story short: not nearly enough Zelda Williams. Also: it’s officially my last movie review from them. So does that mean I’m no longer writing for Kotaku? Nope. I’m actually getting my own monthly column! My first piece should be going live in the coming weeks.

- Next month is PAX East 2013, and I’ll be there of course. Though in addition to being a roving reporter and official Attract Mode rep at the Fangamer booth, I’ll have a third official function: moderator for one of the panels. Once the schedule is finalized and goes public, be sure to keep any eye out for Blending Games and Life: Showing Your Passion

- Speaking of the FG, I’ll be making another appearance on the official podcast. I’m recording my segment once the sneezing is under control, and the episode as a whole should be live by sometime next week, maybe sooner. And what will I be talking about? Why, the time I made a dating sim, that’s what.

- BTW, in addition to this long as blog post, how else have I been spending my evening? Why, watching episodes of the old Saturday morning ALF cartoons (both of them). How come? Because that’s what the next episode of the Saturday Supercast is all about, and which I’ll be a guest on!

Review: Parallel Processing

Parallel Processing is from Dan Behrens, otherwise known as Danimal Cannon, and Chris Penner, otherwise known as Zef. I’m only familiar with the first gentleman, and approaching his latest release, it’s good to know at least his story leading up.

When addressing Dan, I like to refer to him as a journeyman video game musician. Since he’s literally been all over the place; the first real blip on the radar was as a member of ArmCannon, an ensemble that specializes in video game remixes, mostly from the 8bit era. It’s worth noting that their first album was called LegVacuum. And their third album was called ArmCannon 3: LegVacuum 2, FYI.

Not long after, Dan was involved in WeaponeX, described as a “fusion influenced progressive metal project” by Dan on his homepage. I’d like to believe that it was about Mega Man X re-arrangements, but you never know. His next collaboration is the one that most people might know him from, as a member of Metroid Metal. As the name implies, they perform metal covers of classic Metroid standards, and have been wildly successful, to the point that they’re a staple at both MAGFest and PAX for years now.

As the story goes, it was from performing at both venues so often, alongside chiptuners, that Dan began to take an interest in creating his own Game Boy driven melodies. Late 2011 saw the release of his first full-on chiptune release: Roots. Aside from being one of my two favorite chip releases that year (the other being Bias by Minusbaby), it finally put him on the map for those who aren’t into the video game remixing scene. Including myself; I basically lost track/interest around 2002, once the OCRemix scene imploded due to drama.

Well, two years later… a span of time that happened to include a very memorable showing at the final flagship Blip Fest in NYC, plus an equally unforgettable performance at the VERSUS opening… we have his most recent effort, which might honestly be his strongest to date. Parallel Processing, at least to myself, feels like a culmination of the many roads travelled.

Hence the Danimal Cannon history lesson; knowing the long journey to this point will definitely help in the understanding and appreciation of Parallel Processing, as well as help form a narrative. Of a guy whose musical career starting off as just a dude doing happy go-lucky covers of popular games, who eventually found himself as a someone taking control, to explore the medium that inspired said covers and associated emotions. And finally, being in the midst of a deadly serious contest, a face off against some dude name Zef, whom I honestly know little about (though learning more the guy is definitely high on my list of things to do).

With all that in mind, the end result is something that honestly represents the purest form of chiptune. Or should I say, one of it’s most logical conclusions. Which is also why Parallel Processing might not be the most accessible 8bit album you’ll come across. It’s a dense mystery, one that will laugh in your face if you think you can just put on the headphones and be lazy. It demands your attention, and your respect. As with anything that’s aggressive and passionate, you simply have to step up the challenge and keep up.

Though, more than anything else, Parallel Processing is a great example of an album by two parties that honestly feels like it. Especially in the world of chiptunes; for many, much of it sounds the same, and to be honest, much of it DOES sound the same. So to have two very different personalities going at it, via the same medium, and having each person’s effort being unmistakable is quite the achievement (sure it helps that I pretty much know what Danimal Cannon sound is like, but still).

But what if you could care less about Danimal’s backstory, let along the world of chip as a whole? Should you give Parallel Processing a listen? Yes. Because we live in uncertain times, one that is filled with strife and struggle. As a result, we all need music to help us dive headfirst into adversity. Though we’d all like some say in what produces such sounds. And finally, there’s finally a worth soundtrack for such an occasion, done in 8bit. I cannot recommend the album nearly enough.

For those interested in a sample, simply head on over to its Bandcamp page and test drive the first two tracks; you will be sold. And, once you’re ready to put down some cash, might I suggest the Dannimal Cannon Combo, courtesy of Fangamer? You can get it and Roots, plus a snazzy shirt based upon the Parallel Processing, designed by Jon Kay!

One More Thing…

So, FORT90ZINE4ANSWER, what’s the deal? Well… as noted last time, Vegas is an expensive town. And, as a result, my excursion ended up costing me quite the chunk of change. Which means I am currently dirt poor and basically don’t have any money for printing!

I do have money coming on the way, and hope to have it finally printed up by… and I realize how foolish I look, constantly stating deadlines that I never end up meeting, but here goes… by March, in time for PAX East. And, like every delay, I’m using the extra time to add even more content! Basically, additional art.

As always, I sincerely appreciate everyone’s patience. Seriously, everyone’s been so kind and understanding! And anyone who thinks I’m not being serious, simply ask Dannel; he knows first hand what a basket case I am whenever talking about the monkey on my back.

Man, it’s been exactly a month since last checking in. Just goes to show how busy 2013 has been thus far!

And because it’s still a new year, I’m going to try and stick to the resolution I make each and every time, and that’s to have somewhat manageable sized update. Which is why, instead of covering everything that’s happened over the past month or so, I’m just concentrate on…

Las Vegas. So, how was it? Well, more than anything, I was blown away by how stunningly accurate the various depictions of the place, from movies and TV shows, all honestly were. It was equal parts bizarrely fascinating and morbidly depressing. Actually, it wasn’t always equal. Far from it.

After spending an entire week at the place, was expecting to come back home with a ton of wacky Vegas. But alas, was mostly busy with the reason why I was there in the first place: the 2013 Consumer Electronic Show. Actually, not so much busy, but overwhelmed. Will get to that in a bit (and I do have at least one anecdote).

But first; almost immediately after touching ground, and realizing that there are slot machines everywhere, and how everything costs a goddamn fortune, I quickly checked into my hotel and took a cab to where the rest of the TechRadar crew was, to get down to business. Work, on day one, took place here…

Day one was actually day zero, aka the day before CES officially kicked off, which meant covering pressers. Nothing terribly exciting to report here. Once those were finally done and over with, had some down time to play around with, before a shindig in the evening, so I decided to explore.

As I would quickly learn, there are opportunities to gamble everywhere. This is the casino that was just around the corner from the press area…

Here’s a fun fact I also discovered early on: people don’t like it when you take pictures of them gambling. On my first day, almost got kicked out of a casino because of this picture…

Thankfully, the elderly are the exception to that rule; though most were too busy throwing away their pensions to even notice me. Also, in this case, the Michael Jackson game was pretty engrossing…

Speaking of old, most casinos were a jarring mishmash of classic gambling staples ….

And their modern equivalents (which a lot like Beatmania)…

The one thing that never failed to impress me was the architecture of most hotels/casinos…

While some were quite magnificent, others were quite cheesy…

Even funnier was how things were randomly clumped together…

Sorry, but it’s every visiting New Yorker’s job to point and laugh at this sight…

Say hello everybody to “Killer”…

A partial view of the Las Vega strip, way at the southern end, looking north…

You know what I dig a lot, but which you never see around here in NYC, and which therefore got me super excited? Palm tress. Why? I’m pretty sure it’s Sega AM2′s doing…

So my first night in Vegas was spent at this pre-CES party that had all these vendors who, for whatever reason, didn’t have a booth at the show proper. And, funny enough, that’s where I came across the coolest piece of tech from the entire week: the Oculus Rift…

It’s that Kickstarter funded VR headset that you may have heard about. All I can say is that it is quite simply the God’s honest future of video games. Without question, end of story. It’s basically the Star Trek: The Next Generation‘s Holodeck, version 0.001. Even now I can’t get over how amazing the experience was. And this coming from a dude who could care less about virtual reality, or did.

Most amazing part is how I didn’t instantly vomit all over the place in the very first instant! Granted, it is supremely perplexing and disorienting at first. It’s almost like you’re learning to walk for the very first time. But eventually I was able to get the hang of things, and was simply amazed by how I was walking around this virtual environment, and able to look around, with a total free range of motion.

Unfortunately, the Asian part of me eventually kicked in. Still, I hung in there for a good ten minutes, which was much more than I had expected (it usually takes far less time for me to start feeling dizzy with most FPSs). The funny thing is how it has a different effect on different people; some people, like those who never suffer from motion sickness, can’t handle more than ten seconds (like Mike, apparently).

Another highlight of the party was the abundance of tiny hamburgers, tiny hot dogs, and tiny pizzas. Hey, I love finger foods! Also tater tots. Lots and lots of tater tots…

The next day was CES proper and, I have to say… speaking as who considers himself a vet of conventions… I was completely taken aback (and at times, flat out flummoxed) by how massive the entire thing was. It’s like San Diego Comic Con, yet somehow bigger.

So, was there any cool stuff? Well, I mostly stuck to the things my editor ordered me to report on, and thustly had precious little opportunity to really explore on my own. And when the chance did arrive, there was so much sensory overload that my brain basically shut down. Anyone familiar with all my other show reports should know already that this was highly unusual for me!

I did come across a lot of stuff that could be considered cool by some. Like the 4K TVs that made their debut at the show. But, sorry, I honestly couldn’t tell the difference between them and your “average” HD display…

Also, those familiar with my TechRadar output is well aware of how cell phones are my jam. Was really looking forward to groping some sexy new Android handsets, especially since (like so many around these parts) I’m suffering from iPhone/iOS fatigue.

Yet there honestly wasn’t anything: no Galaxy S4 as hoped. Hell, even BlackBerry and their new devices were total no-shows. The best thing going was the latest from Sony. Can say I’m the biggest fan of their Xperia line…

Again, there was so much stuff to process that I almost couldn’t handle it. Making matters much worse (and which was easily the worst part of the entire show) is how I had to cover all these Windows 8 laptops that were impossible to make heads or tails of.

The lowest point was at the Intel booth, where I got pissed at a rep who got pissed at me for pointing out how silly it was that he couldn’t figure out how to use Windows 8 (which, sorry, is kinda insane). At least they had this cool looking tree in which all the foliage was made out of Windows laptops, and that was pretty cool…

The end of day one was the TechRadar after party. It took place at a swanky hotel, which is a bit silly to say, since every hotel in Vegas is swanky. Actually, it took place at a club within a hotel; here’s the ceiling that everyone starred at while waiting to get inside (though since I was staff, I didn’t have to actually wait)…

The club itself was some cheesy Asian fusion type of deal, a weird hodgepodge of Japanese, Chinese, and Korean. One could easily describe the entire city as just one big, goofy jumble of “things” as well…

Due to it being such a hot ticket, the doors were closed fairly early on, and Mike plus other pals weren’t able to make it in. So I ended up getting drinks at the bar (which was open, at least for myself), and taking them outside. Best part is how no one cared. Granted, we weren’t technically out in the streets, but even then, it would not have been an issue. Pretty much everyone drinks and smokes, all over the place. No one give’s a rat’s ass. It truly is Disneyland for adults.

Speaking of, and for those wondering: no I did not go to any strip clubs, despite having plenty of opportunities to do so. Like after the party; I declined on joining a bunch of folk who wanted to keep the night going. Afterwards, a colleague who was part of the action told me how he ended up accidentally blowing almost two grand at one such place. Holy sh*t indeed. Not that I would ever dare part ways with that much money… which would have been a big issue.

I hate to knock Vegas, but my biggest irk was how aggressive everyone was. Walking down the street, people are literally yelling at you to go to whatever strip club that they shill for. Like the one dude’s attempt at courting me, whose line kicked off this entry. At least that guy was somewhat funny; others, including some working the show… I’m talking about security guards, bartenders, even the people that were supposed to give information… were just flat out dicks.

It makes sense I guess; the entire city is built around being an alpha male, so that mindset naturally permeates everywhere. Though that wasn’t the only reason why I was skittish about exploring the city, well into the night, as I had planned on. Another issue was how my hotel was relatively far away from the strip (arrangements were made pretty late in the game, and it was the best I could get). Which meant, unless I wanted to blow an additional $40 a day on cabs (and I didn’t), I couldn’t drop my stuff off at the end of the day, i.e. my laptop, before going back out for adventures.

Not that I was afraid that I was going to get into any trouble, but my entire life is on it. Plus a MacBook Pro does get kinda heavy after about 15 hours. Ultimately, having my laptop on my at all times was somewhat essential, since I plenty of work to do in the evenings as well, which also allowed me to explore the fantastic architecture that was one definite highlight of the trip…

One after show soiree took place at Caesar’s Palace, which legitimately blew me away the most. This sounds so cheesy, but walking towards the entrance, alongside many others, really felt as if I was in Rome circa 100 BC!

Got to watch two Korean Starcraft players going at it, check out a 1TB flash drive that costs like a thousand dollars or something like that, and admire this super teeny-tiny PC. Much like the 4K TV pic from above, I wish I had something to give a sense of scale…

Also, the finger foods they served were insanely delicious. Anyhow, was so swept up by the spirit of Vegas at that point (was also mighty drunk at the time), that I decided to actually give throwing my money away a shot as well. I chose the following slot machine…

Why? Take a closer look…

Was totally confused. Even if I wasn’t inebriated, I would have had no idea as to what did what. But hey, at least I made some money (by lining up all squirrels, I think)…

Back to one other not so pleasant thing about Vegas: Carrot Top pretty much owns the place…

Yet another thing from the trip that I was upset over? I really wanted to see Wayne Newton live, and wouldn’t you know, the one time I’m in his neck of the woods, the guy’s not there and instead performing in Atlantic City! Also wanted to see Penn & Teller, and despite the fact that they were performing in my hotel, I couldn’t go. Again, due to my schedule. Which is why, when I heard of Tablet Man, I had to check this guy out…

And I did…

Other highlights from the show floor includes this tiny robot on a tiny bike…

And this rather large wooden drawing model on a not as tiny bike…

Back to robots; one of my favorite finds was this little robotic Android that is programmed and controlled on the fly by any Android device, of course. As well as with iOS…

CES isn’t just about hardware, but software as well. Get this: Vocaloids are finally coming to the US!

So there was this guy, who I wanted to take a picture of, but i also didn’t want to indulge him either, so I chose instead to take a pic from behind, as he was chatting with Elvis (would later find out that the dude in question is someone who goes around calling himself Sir Gaga, real named Gary Fisher)…

Perhaps my biggest disappointment of the entire trip was how I was not able to check out the one arcade everyone told me about, Insert Coin(s). Unfortunately it was too far away, and otherwise, there were no arcades elsewhere, period. So I simply walked up and down the strip, hoping to run into “something”…

… I really wish I had gotten the chance to see Cook. E. Jar. As well as this guy (okay, maybe not)…

The Bellagio Fountains was certainly a sight to behold. If you think this is a beautiful, imagine the water dancing to the tune of “Proud To Be An American” I had a hard time taking picture, due to the water that was pouring from my eyes…

Once CES 2013 wrapped up, it was time for the big dinner with coworkers before heading home. Which was at Planet Hollywood; got there a bit early, hoping to check out some movie memorabilia. Cuz you’d think such a place would have such stuff, right? Nope. At least I was able to run into the throngs of Miss Teen USA participants who were in town (as soon as one event ends, like CES, something else takes its place; alongside the beauty pageant, you also had the porn convention, lol) and waiting in line for some stage show that was happening, one starring Ice T’s wife, Coco (again, lol).

I wanted to ask how they kept their little crowns in place, but A) I’m sure every douche, dork, and Harry asks them that, every single day, and B) each had a handler, to deal with said miscreants. At the very least, was again reminded of how I have very particular tastes in women, and how it does not line up with middle America. I certainly have a type, and they all live in New York City (certain parts at least), Los Angeles (again, not across the board), and Portland (maybe Austin too). And for anyone thinking I’m a creep for eyeballing teenage girls, A) with all that make up, they all looked mid 30s, and B) I still have a thing for Hermione.

While waiting at the hotel bar for everyone else to arrive, it dawned on me … and this is my last complaint, I swear to God… how horrible the go-go dancing is in Vegas. Not that I’m some connoisseur, but I’ve soon way better (I know a really good place, in Park Slope of all places, but that’s neither here nor there). Anyhow, dinner was served and it was awesome. As well as hella expensive; thankfully, the company took care of the bill. Was tempted to make my final night in Vegas an all nighter, but because I had an early flight back home in the morning, opted to head back to the hotel at a reasonable hour…

Yet I was restless, so I decided to check out the casino that was downstairs, mostly for some more stuff to Instagram. Since taking pics of people at the craps table got me in hot water once before, I decided to explore the far end of the casino, which was pretty much deserted (it was 3:30AM after-all). It was there that I noticed a pair of eyes fixated on me…

And because I had a dollar just burning a hole in my pocket, I decided to gamble once again. I also had plenty of options; hardly anyone was playing any of the slot machines that was surrounding me. The one I decided upon was awesome because it was tailor made for cheap-ass, mister no pennies like myself; one could break down the dollar into ten cent bets, insuring much crank pulling.

So I’m sitting there, watching the barrels roll till they stopped, and making them roll again, like a total idiot, when a woman came up to me. Not just any woman, but a prostitute. She asked: “Want some company tonight?”

And I simply replied with: “Thanks, but no thanks.”

Was expecting her to just move along with no fuss or muss, like when you decline a stripper’s offer for a lap dance at a strip club. But no, she just stood there, staring at me, with a mixture of confusion and disgust. After about ten seconds… ten very long and awkward seconds… she eventually moved on. And, because I apparently had at least the look of confusion on my face as well, a hotel employee (or at least a guy dressed as one) came up to me and quietly screamed…

“Hey kid, what are you doing here? You want to play the slots? Well play the slots OVER THERE, with everyone else. Because, if you’re sitting here, by your lonesome self, you know what that tells me, and others? THAT YOUR’RE LOOKING FOR SOME PUSSY. And if that ain’t what you’re here for, THEN GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE.”

And with that, I put all my remaining money on one last spin, which was sixty cents, and I was indeed outta there…

So yeah, guess that for me was Vegas for me in a nut shell? Guess that’s it for now; next time I’ll go over what’s been happening since, as well as some stuff to look forward to, as well as… an album review! Till tomorrow (maybe, hopefully).