Hey, another week (plus a couple of days), another update. Since it’s been rather all over the place, I guess this entry should follow suit, so I’ll simply be dotting stuff down as they come to me…
Beware Of Chinese Burritos
So yeah, I’ve been kinda out of it since last week. It all started with this bad chicken burrito from last Tuesday night. I guess all that really needs to be said is the conversation afterwards with Jason:
“So I think I got food poisoning.”
“What did you have?”
“A burrito.”
“Was it a Chinese burrito?”
“Yup.”
“Well there ya go.”
For those who don’t live in NYC, most of the fast food Tex Mex places are run by the Chinese. Also the best sushi chefs are often Mexican, Albanians usually makes the pizzas, and who usually goes the most ga-ga for Chinese food around here? You got it, the Jews. Point being, its all mixed up around here. As for Katie’s guacamole salad, she said it was okay.
Anyhow, I started feeling bad almost immediately afterwards and went to bed early…. around nine that night. Had a bunch of crazy dreams, culminating in my dad as he was about to whip me with some television antennas (bunny-ears). That got me up at three in the morning, and I couldn’t go back to sleep. Was actually able to wake Katie this time around (she always gets up early for work, whereas these days I just sleep till noon since I’m normally up till four working, but that doesn’t stop her from waking me up and asking silly questions, along with other forms of comical mischief) and make pancakes (or at least try to; not too long ago I gave it my first shot and was super successful, but it’s been downhill ever since… I can’t get the right consistency to the batter, nor cook them properly). Tried returning to bed after she left, since I had an event to cover later that evening and knew rest would be needed for it, but because I was somewhat wired, didn’t manage to fall asleep till three. Had a two hour long power nap, which got me up just in time to realize that I would miss my thing, but thankfully, everyone was sorta late due to the trains running like shit. The event in question was the IGDA NY & NJ’s Demo Night, which I’ll touch upon in just a moment…
Since then, I’ve been struggling to get my sleep schedule back to normal, and was almost there till yesterday. As silly as it sounds, my first time with the Wii Fit (which yes, I finally got, and without having to beg to Nintendo for one) flat-out spent me, requiring a nap yesterday in the later afternoon. So speaking off…
Step Aerobics With Hitler
The arrival of the Wii Fit could not come at a better time, as I attempt to whip my sorry ass in shape. And thus far, I’m pretty impressed by the package. While hardly perfect, most of the activities do their job, of making one sweat, especially the yoga exercises, which I’m surprisingly decent at. The strength exercises are, not surprisingly, my weakest area; earlier today I almost felt like I was going to pass out from one of the activities, but hey, no pain no gain, right? I’m also pretty decent when it comes to the aerobics mini-games (hula hoop is lots of fun, though I do have more fun watching Katie do them… sorry honey!), whereas I flat out suck when it comes to the balance mini-games (hardly a surprise, I have shit balance, hence why I can’t ride a bike, among other things).
The immediate goal is to loose just a couple of pounds, which the program will helping me out with by monitoring my progress. My body mass index, is not surprisingly not good; I’m considered obese, though just barely according from Wii Fit’s charts and graphs. I also had my Wii Fit Age taken, and it’s 31, which is my real age, so I guess I’m not that bad of shape. I guess my only real issue is the relative lack of space in which I’m doing my work-out, plus how my TV is low to the ground, so its hard sometimes to follow along with the virtual instructor. Also, Wii Fit is by no means going to completely replace my normal regimen; I’m still jogging, though I’m giving up doing push-ups and sit-ups on my own, since all that hard stuff will be lot easier to endure with an ultra catchy Nintendo soundtrack in the background.
As for what else I’ve been “playing”… Finally went out and got Grand Theft Auto 4. Been expecting a copy from Rockstar for the longest time, but when it was quite clear that I had been forgotten about, I bit the bullet and actually bought one (I guess I’m no longer on their list of bloggers that they care about… oh well). And what else can I say? Much of what I liked from before has lost its luster, and I’m even more confused by ever by the unanimous praise that it has received. All I can say is that, for a game that places such emphasis on vehicles, the behind the wheels controls is absolutely pathetic. For reals. Though controls in general totally bites; combat is a joke, and that whole sequence where I had to climb ladders and jump rooftops to chase somebody was far from smooth and exciting as it should have been. I also love how instead of being any help, the options menu manages to confuse one even more; there’s a diagram showing what each of the 38 buttons on the controller does, but because the information gives changes every three seconds, its just another minor, stupid nuisance. Plus, hooray for games that use every single button on the controller! Jesus Christ.
It really says something when I was completely bored in the first 30 minutes, as well as at a total loss of what to do next, requiring me to actually go online to find out what I was supposed to do to advance things. I figured I could kill time, till the next mission triggered or something, by hijacking a cab and collecting fares, like in the other GTA games, but was shocked and pissed to discover that you can’t do that here (at least not yet, or so I’ve heard). Great. Worse was the all the trouble I went through chasing down and hijacking a Mister Softee truck for, again, totally nothing. And riding around Brooklyn and Queens just gets fucking old… I want Manhattan, and I want it now. Oh, and speaking of boring, I’m already bored stiff by the “edgy” script. I just wish the game didn’t try so hard to be cool and IN MY FACE, YO! It’s the little things, the understated stuff, like the awesome radio content, or just watching TV that’s still the best (though it?s pretty sad when the best thing to do in the virtual world is to sit around and watch television). And I guess its not all totally bad; the lead character is actually extremely like-able, and not some Scarface wannabe as one might expect. Plus the drunk effects that one has to deal with after some drinks is extremely impressive (as well as accurate). I just don’t see myself playing this game for that much longer. I at least wanted to hang in there till I got to Manhattan, but at this point, each play session is just a combination of boredom and frustration. I guess I could simply use a cheat code like everyone else, but that alone already speaks volumes about how broken GTA 4 truly is. So don’t expect a review anytime soon, if ever.
Though one can expect one for another game that I hated a short while back, because the time spent with this particular title has actually been quite enjoyable! I’m talking about Burnout Paradise; EA recently passed along a copy, I guess for me to give it a second look at since someone on their end perhaps remember me causing a big stink that one time I checked it late last year. Well, after getting the chance to sit down and really dig into things, it’s not half bad… at least when I accepted the fact that it’s no Burnout 3. It tries to do something else, and while it’s kinda rough around the edges, as well as being somewhat overwhelming at first, eventually things begin to come together, making it one of the best casual arcade racers to date. At the very least, its still one of the absolutely jaw-droppingly beautiful games you’ll find anywhere (hence why I kept going back to the demo, despite not knowing what the fuck is going on and getting pissed by all the confusion). More to come!
Another game that’ll be reviewing very soon is Soul Calibur 4, which I’m more or less done with. Right off the back: I guess its nice that they made unlocking characters much easier this time around, but perhaps too much so? Hence why I haven’t played it nearly as much as the other three (okay four) in the series. Otherwise, this aficionado of virtual tits in armor does approve, especially in the looks department. I just wish there wasn’t any Star Wars to gay shit up, and interface is an unfortunate mess (even worse than three). I can’t believe its from the same company that brought us the user interface sex that is Ridge Racer. Oh, and then there’s Braid, which I fucking love to death, even if it tells me that I’m pretty dumb. Though I did take Dave Mauro’s advice to skip the challenges in world four, and am doing much better in world five. Whereas I can’t figure out how to solve puzzles in which the world goes forward when you do, and vice versa, all the stuff involving your shadow seems to just click for me.
Oh, I also recently started up my GameFly account, to play all those PS2 and Xbox 1 games that I missed the first time around. Currently messing around with Dino Crisis 3, though not for long. I knew that it sucked, but I guess I had to see for myself. After all, mutant dino stalking in space is too good to pass up, no matter what the critics says. Though in this instance, they were totally correct; the camera is total ass, enough to completely cripple the experience (for one: you hardly ever see the dinos you’re blasting, i.e. the main reason why you’re playing it in the first place).
Remembering The White Wolf Party
Let’s go back a bit, back to Wednesday night. That’s when the eighth Demo Night went down, an event in which local game creators show off and discuss their latest creations to their peers, and… I think I’ve mentioned this before, or at least hinted towards the sentiment, but I gotta say it once again and for all, nice and clear: as awesome it is that more and more stuff is happening here in NYC as it relates to game dev, a lot of it is also becoming increasingly boring. It’s the main reason why I guess I’ve kinda lost touch with the local scene (that and I’ve just been busy as hell). Demo Night 8 had pretty much everyone would has come to expect: a FPS mod featuring a WW2 setting (zzzz), a casual game that, despite having some very nice production values, is ultimately just another one of those extremely boring hidden object games (double zzzz), a serious game that teaches kids the ills of drunk driving (well, at least its not as retarded as “educating” people on how working at Kino’s is actually a shitty job).
Not surprisingly, the highlight once again was Dave Gilbert talking about his latest Blackwell game. I’m not just saying this cuz I “discovered” the guy, but he’s one of the few folks around here that truly embodies the indie game dev sprit that everyone is so found of talking about here in NYC. Dave actually sticks his neck out there and puts it all the chips on the table, doing stuff that’s genuinely independent, as well as actually fun to play, whereas many others in the scene seem too determined to try and run with the big dogs or are too preoccupied with flirting with academia. Which I guess is why, instead of writing about all of Demo Night, I’ll just be focusing on Dave for Gamasutra… I’m interviewing him tomorrow on the stuff he touched upon that night (and right after yet another Rock Band 2 appointment, I guess one last chance to test drive the game before it comes out real soon).
That’s not to say that Demo Night was a total bust; there was Discarded Online, a fusion between Streets of Rage and Pokemon that looks interesting, and another game that was aimed at folks who are severely handicapped by utilizing full body movement via motion tracking controller was pretty neat. Plus, it afforded me the chance to catch up with some familiar faces, most of whom I hadn’t seen since my trip to San Francisco; Brandon Van Slyke and I got to recount the madness that was the White Wolf party (plus you can too). And was able to catch up with Nick Fortugno and talk to him about live action RPGs (which he used to run, and that I’ve always said I’d give a shot when the opportunity came up, at least one helmed by Nick).
Though I didn’t stick around for the after-party. Instead I met up with Katie, Mooney, and Joe Salina at some obnoxious bar near St. Marks. Basically, every five minutes the bartender, followed by everyone else, would shush everybody. Basically, it used to be run by monks, but when the effect is completely undercut when you’ve got some douchebag hipster bartender in that role. Also, the main body of folks playing along, yet another gaggle of hipster pricks, also happened to be loudest, yet also the most eager to give me the evil eye for having a loud person. Oh, and one of them was some short dyke who had a huge backpack that simply got in everyone’s way. Cocktail Lounge this place most certainly was not. Neat paintings on the wall though. I recall seeing a dragon raping some poor townsfolk.
Whatever Happened To…. Spready Bear?
I guess this is as good as time as any to mention…. Not too long ago, someone asked me “Hey, so what’s the deal with Spready Bear?” Good question. I have no idea. The last time I did anything game design related was my short-lived gig at Black Hammer (lulz), and I can’t remember how long before that I last touched Spready Bear. I guess if I have a reason to NOT like Dave Gilbert is that he stole my main artist behind the game away from me (John Green)! Though the truth of the matter is, the main programmer had to take a sabbatical and I never heard from him ever again….
Since that time, I’ve been offered the chance to collaborate with Jason once again on something different, plus I’m might have a consultation gig very soon (more on that when it happens, if it happens), but Spready Bear is simply not in the cards at this point. Which is a shame I guess, but perhaps its time might eventually come.
But hey, look what I just stumbled across!
… That there is just two bits of concept art that accompanied my concept document for a game based on Shaolin Soccer, the Stephen Chow movie that came out a few years back. I was hired by Miramax to explore the possibility of a game, but alas, they decided to pass. It would have been cool though; assorted soccer teams across the globe, with each one employing a fighting style native to its nation of origin (karate for the Japanese team, Taekwondo for the Korean team, Muay Thai for the Thai team, Capoeira for the Brazilian team, and so on). Basically, your average sports sim, mixed with elements of fighting, and vague RPG elements, along with plenty of comedy to keep everything nice and light.
And before anyone asks, no I haven’t found my Charles In Charge RPG design document yet. Sorry.
The Truth Behind Mystery Science Theater 3000
The next day Rob Catlin stopped swung by my neck of the woods since he had some teacher’s workshops in Harlem. Talked about lots of different things, including…. Mystery Science Theater 3000. Him and his wife Michele went to the San Diego Comic Con a few weeks back and decided to attend the MST3K reunion panel, which turned out to be quite the event. For the time ever, the entire original crew were on stage together… these days, there’s two camps, former head writer and second host Mike Nelson’s Riff Trax crew, which is mostly just him and dude who did the voice of Tom Servo, and MST3K’s brainchild Joel Hodgson and his just established Cinematic Titanic, which includes more or less everyone else from the original show (including the voice of Crow/Dr. Forester, Frank, plus more).
For those who don’t know, Riff Trax are downloadable mp3s that you play along with movies, which allows Nelson to basically add commentary to any movie under the sun, without dealing with legal headaches. And along with classic, B movies, numerous contemporary flicks are made fun of. Though Rob also agrees that part of the MST3K charm is that the movies are supposed to be so bad you’ve never heard of them. Meanwhile Cinematic Titanic is just like the original show, except instead of being from outer space, they’re all on some seafaring ship, and instead of silhouettes at the bottom (like sitting behind a row at a movie theater), they’re to the sides, as if they’re standing on platforms on the ship’s masts. Their target seems to be, as before, completely wretched and obscure movies, and sounds like fun (in fact, as I type this, I’m downloading the initial offering from their website, so I’ll pass along my two cents next time).
Anyhow, Rob noted that, while everyone shared the same stage, and both camps answered the same sets of questions, you could tell that each side was not all that fond of the other. Joel never addressed nor even looked at Mike, or Jim Mallon, the co-creator of the show. In fact, the tension between the two was the most evident, and rather monumental revelation was disclosed: the real reason Joel left the show. The official explanation was that Joel wanted to move onto other projects, but the truth is, him and Jim had a huge falling out, to the point that one of them simply had to go, and for whatever reason, Joel decided to pack his bags. In the process he handpicked Mike as his replacement, which might make the animosity a bit puzzling, but then again, perhaps Joel was simply not happy with the direction of the show under him. And as a former diehard MST3K fan, I was never a fan of Mike at the helm, and all that followed (which may or may not be his fault, like all the nonsense that went down with Sci Fi… then again, Mike could be responsible in the sense that he let shit happen). Hence why Joel was not at all happy about leaving and missed spoofing movies dearly (though I’m not certain if he regretted leaving), which eventually led to Cinematic Titanic.
Oh, and I also showed Karate Ruler to Rob, whom I had thought had seen it already (everyone else in the Dave Roman crew has at this point, at least I believe). I’ve seen that movie at least 200 times by now (no exaggeration), but its always a fun watch, especially when it’s with someone’s first time.
The World’s First And Only Pro Christian, Junkie Turned Killer Turkey Flick
Sticking with shitty movies, the following evening was Horror Night 2.5 at Joe Simko’s. In attendance were Jay and Richie from the Beer Drinking Fools. The theme of the night was head trauma films (meaning trauma caused by heads) and first up was Head of the Family. Now when you see something like this…
… You can’t lose, right? Wrong. Instead of him being some diabolical killer head confined to a wheelchair and killing people in mass, presumably to build himself a body, you get a lame, campy-horror comedy. The plot goes something like this: there’s a redneck town in which the owner of some diner is having an affair with the girlfriend of the resident tough guy/extortionist. There’s also a gaggle of freaks (including a strong man, skinny dude, and a porn star looking chick) that diner dude witnesses do some dirty work (he sees them carrying away a dead body), so eventually he breaks into their compound and comes face to face with the head of the family, literally speaking, who controls the rest, like phantom limbs. Indeed he is kidnapping hapless townsfolk to conduct conduct experiments on, to eventually build a new body, and is about to add the diner guy to the body-pile, till he says that we saw some bad things and demands them to do his bidding (getting rid of his girl’s guy) or he’ll call the cops. So what ensues is some ultra boring extortionist plot, devoid of buckets of blood and gore. Instead of being unintentionally funny, it actually goes for laughs. Whatever. To be honest, I forget what happens because we were so bored that the four of us ended up talking throughout most of it, mostly about girls, since the evening also doubled as “dude’s night.” With the highlight having to be Richie’s views on feminism, as well as lipstick lesbians (including the time we was simply trying to enjoy a dish of spagetti that he ordered at A BAR and two girls started making out in front of him, and because he didn’t give two shits, they became annoyed), Suicide Girls (“Why would I find a girl hot that wants to kill herself?!”) and girls that cover themselves with tattoos (he finds them ultra lame, and I’m TOTALLY on that train of thought).
The second flick on our double bill was Blood Freak, which is about a stoner whose head turns into a turkey and gobbles up the blood of other junkies and dealers. Again, sounds like a total winner, right? Not really… the premise is obviously sound, and the execution is bad, extremely bad, the kind of bad we love, meaning horrible acting, indecipherable plot, crappy special effects, horrible camerawork, among other things, but you know what they say about too much of a good (in this case bad…. or vice versa) thing? Making this film extra special is how it was funding by a bunch of Bible thumpers, who instead of wanting to make an anti-drug film like everyone else in the 60s decided to go for the gory route. You have the somewhat Walt Disney-esque narrator, the mad scientists played by actual doctors (who can’t act), the horrendous looking blue turkey head get-up with blood red eyes, the overlaid gobble-gobbles, blood squirting from the victim’s arteries and the turkey-man cupping the blood up to his beak, as well as him asking his lady friend to pray for his soul. Though the highlight would have to be him chasing some dude down, then cutting of his leg with a saw, because the effect was so damn good, thanks to the fact that the actor was actually missing a leg! Now that I think of it, that movie was kinda awesome.
It was also during Horror Night that I had my first root beer in, God, at least ten years. And man was it heaven. Anyway, Horror Night 3 will be taking place during September, where I’ll be showing Chopping Mall, where a bunch of kids having a sex party at the mattress place in the mall are taken down by the malfunctioning security robots (Katie turned me onto this one, and man is it ever amazing) and retard Blair Witch Project. Can’t wait!
6.2 YOKOHAMA, JAPAN
Joe also had a gift for me this past weekend: the official Magma 2007 DVD was recently release in Japan and I got a copy. It basically chronicles the entire second show of the Magma Fest that took place in Yokohama (for those that need a refresher, simply click here), including all the performers on the main and second stage. Naturally, all the Japanese acts (which, aside from being far more interesting overall, were all totally cool and not at all the jackasses the the majority of the American acts turned out to be) only had a song each, while the bulk of DVD was dedicated towards to headliners from USA.
It was awesome seeing Red Bacteria Vacuum (that totally hot Japanese punk rock girl duo, along with the Abe Lincoln looking drummer) and the Stackers (the dudes that helped to put the show together and were seriously the nicest guys in all of Japan, which is saying a lot, as well perhaps my fave act of the entire line-up) in action once again, and was just as annoyed and pissed off by Bouncing Souls, H20, and Sick Of It All (who, once again, all acted like total prima-donna, spoiled, rich-boy brats) like the first time around. As previously noted, the only American bands that weren’t total assholes and were actually pleasant were Murphy’s Law and Harley’s War (though truth be told, I mostly mention Harley because I don’t my ass kicked by the guy… then again, I am the dude that helped to fix his video camera in Okinawa, so I hope I’m still okay in his book).
Cat Update
I guess now might be a good time to provide an update on the cat. Obviously, I’m still alive. In fact, I’m more or less suffering from zero ill effects from the cat! Guess it was true what I was told: a proper diet does reduce the allergens that affect those with allergies. That and I’ve been super religious about cleaning after her. Anyhow, the one-month trial period is almost over, and Katie is about to submit the paperwork and the check to finalize the adoption. Which means we’re definitely keeping Josie!
And she’s an awesome kitty… though, Jesus Christ is she ever stupid. I mean, cats aren’t exactly rocket scientists, nor are they even bright as dogs, but its so wacky (yet cute) how she’ll cuddle up with us for a good while, and then all of sudden forgets who we are and become totally petrified of us. Though her best attribute has to be the dumb/blank stare that she always has, coupled with the black patch of the bottom part of her mouth, which totally make her look like a dufus. She is kind of life a dog in one respect: Josie sometimes chases her tail. The only real concern is her diet; initially Josie was a fat cat, because her original constantly kept her bowl filled with dry food. The adoption agency managed to slim her down by feeding her a can of food of day, but when we first got her, she was ultra shy, so to make her feel relaxed, we allowed her to have about two cans a day. Bad mistake, cuz from that point on, it appeared that she had gained some weight and also began the nasty habit of begging for more food, constantly. Since then we’ve gone back to one can a day, but man, is she ever one hungry kitty.
Truth be told, the most fun Katie and I have had thus far has been lightly torturing her. Not to say that we grab her by the tail and throw her around (though I have been fighting the urge to grab her by the hind legs and lift her up, like Mr Lopez in my old place of residence used to let me), but Katie & I like to chase her around, make her dance, and place stuff on her. That kind of stuff.
Odds & Ends
AKA the “what stupid crap is on my radar update”; just found out that the second wave of the Shooting Game Historica is finally out…
… Which can all be picked up over at National Console Support. Though before getting any of those, I should perhaps round out my collection of Mecha Musumes first.
And earlier this weekend, I came across this… a pretty God damn decent blog penned by some dude that apparently lives near me! Also, the dude has some fantastic taste in video games (any fan of U.N. Squadron is a friend of mine, plus I also agree that Psychonauts is more than a little overrated) and YouTube videos (that’s where I first caught this fantastic homage to John Carpenter’s The Thing done with G.I. Joes).
Also this past Friday was one of my best friends from back home, Suzanne’s wedding day (plus this past Sunday was also her birthday). Suzy has always been like a sister to me, so it really pained me that I had to miss the blessed occasion. But at least I’ll be seeing her later this year, at her brother’s wedding in October. At least I hope to…. Aside from the fact that it conflicts with my first, and perhaps only chance ever to see one of my most favorite bands, Killing Joke, in the flesh (they’re on a world tour where, at each city, there’ll be two shows; the first will cover mostly early stuff and the second will have them doing all of Pandemonium, which I must have listened in high school about three hundred times over, front to back, and who knows how many more times since, along with some other cuts), I may not being able to make it due to an already packed schedule. Not helping is how I will have already done some heavy traveling the weekend prior, which is SPX weekend, but I’m sorta scheduled to wrap up a major project that I’ve been toiling away on for the past couple of weeks, and for the next couple down the road. Oh, and because of SPX, I believe Katie’s vacation time will be all spent by then, or at least not before dipping into the block reserved for the trip to Japan for Magma 2009. Time will tell…
Hey, speaking of SPX, even though Spready Bear is somewhat dead in the water, I’ve got brand new installments of UNLUCKY in the oven and set to make their debut at the show! At least, that’s the plan. Right now I have a bunch of uber talented pals, such as Travis Nichols and Allan Norico and Dave Savage, plus maybe even Zack G. and Hilary. I’m hoping for not just one brand new preview mini, but two! Maybe even three if Todd Webb manages to actually get his story done! BTW, if you’re out there Todd, let me what’s up, k?
Oh, and like I’m always saying I will, I hope to have a few extra neat things on hand, mostly other comics, though Joel recently planted a seed in my head which might lead to something else at the show. According to the guy, he totally thinks I should try to produce a video game zine. I guess something like Life Meter, but with words. And I had toyed around in the past with the idea of printing up my favorite blog entries, but doing something entirely original could be cool… plus as Joel pointed out, I do know a ton of folks who could contribute. Something to think about I guess.
Anyhow, I’ll be sharing a table with Katie, of course, where among other things, you’ll find the latest installment of her space nurse odyssey/fantasy, Nurse Nurse, which she’s been toiling away on. Here’s a sneak peak at issue #3…
Finally, astute readers might have noticed… I’ve got no i am 8-bit pics. For a while it appeared as if Slonie was going to make the trip on my behalf and snap some shots, but he simply couldn’t fit it into his schedule. And unfortunately my call for photographers didn’t net anyone, at least for this particular event; one guy I became acquainted with at ICON did mention that while he couldn’t do Hollywood, he’ll be going to various furry conventions in the near future and will be able to produce some pictures of what he encounters. And everyone knows how much I just LOVE furries! Anyway, for those that might be interested, my buddy Mike over at Kotaku managed to take some pics of the i am 8-bit 08 opening, which can be found here. There’s plenty of pretty yet (yet completely tired at this point) tributes to Mario and friends to be found, but there appears to be some new territory being blazed, with the kinda NSFW Bionic Commando piece being my current fave.
