December 2005

12/20/2005

“Best Attempt To Pander to Stoners”

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

So anyway…

This last weekend was fairly laid back, at least when compared to the past couple. On Friday night was Rob & Michele’s birthday get-together, where I received a gag Xmas gift from Dave: an Avril Lavigne “sketch book”. It’s a small spiral-bound notebook containing pictures, sketches, and poetry from Avril, which is meant to be an intimate look into the soul that is Avril. Its pretty fucking hilarious, especially the little sketch of an eye that’s crying (cuz she’s so filled with teh sad-o’s), which I’m so sure she scribbled and not some uncredited production assistant.

I also forgot to mention another gag-gift that Dave passed along last weekend: yet another crappily produced Transformers story book (he always grabs one for me at a con or something… I have a couple thus far). You can find scans of it here; astute Transformer fans will instantly notice that much of it is traced directly from the back of the box… and very badly at that. Hopefully, I’ll eventually get a copy of that one I used to have where the Autobots had very human eyes (even in car mode!) and teeth. Speaking off, I would pay anything to have the original artwork to this:

As for my latest addition to my collection, the original owner’s name is written in the inside front cover (the kid had to be no older than 4, at least going by the handwriting). So Brian Myers from 310 Shed Road in Rye, New York, if you’re reading this… I have your book.

I was also told that not only is the fact I never learned how to ride a bike pretty depressing, but the fact that I had a bike but the training wheels were put on incorrectly, which meant that I could never properly learn balance and thus why I never learned how to properly ride, was the saddest thing Dave had ever heard. Which to be honest, would make an excellent title, perhaps a replacement for “Unlucky”?

On Saturday, MK & I went holiday shopping in Jersey. We stopped by the Japanese food mart and managed to stock up on supplies, including….

Here’s some freeze-dried ice cream snacks that I got mostly because of the super box:

A box of choco-filled cookies. You randomly get one of several groovy looking bear key-chains. I ended up getting the tough guy with kendo stick one, as pictured on the box:

Some chocolate biscuits which I again picked up due to the very keen box:

Here’s a pack of Tamagochi shaped jelly treats. It has that great strawberry jelly scent that only the Japanese seem to know how to produce:

Hey, remember the angry pepper from before? Well here he is again, and eating one of his own kind:

Easily the most popular item was the assortment of make your own, glow in the dark figures. There’s eight different types, and the parts are totally interchangeable. Thankfully, unlike most Japanese toy assortments, you know exact what you’re getting, hence the mad rush of folks digging through the pile to get the ones they wanted (actually, it mostly this really big Japanese kid who kept growling to himself… plus he must have been no older than 11 or 12, but he had grey hair!). I got two, a pirate and a scorpion, but haven’t had time to put them together (some assembly is required):

Next door to the food store is a place that sells toys plus teapots and cups, which is where I picked this up; Steamboy may have made a lousy movie, but the figures are hella cool:

They also had keychains from Virtual On characters, so of course I had to get one:

Plus, there were huge plush pillows with Super Mario bad guys on them, an awesome model kit of a robot that was part fighter jet and all surfer, plus assorted New Japan wrestling toys (featuring many talents whom I had only heard of but never knew what they looked liked, like Chono and Naruse). Unfortunately, neither MK & I had a camera handy, hence no pics…

And on Sunday we saw the Chronicles of Narnia, which I thought was pretty neat. Plus we had Callahan’s twice! Unfortunately, the service was pretty shitty on Saturday; this dumb bitch got all huffy because I was pissed that she was leaning on my chilidog. Also, MK’s dad did an impression of Johnny 5 being electrocuted. So, when was the last time your father did anything as cool?
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Once again, its been a pretty busy week, so I’ve had barely a chance to surf the web for much gaming news; I’ve been on the GAF for like 5 minutes this past week, which is like a record for me!. But I have caught bits and pieces…

- Well the big news is that the new PSP Katamari game (now I understand that its called Me and My Katamari) is going to have a 2D mini-game:

Also, in the January is running their pics for best games of 2005, and We Love Katamari won the “Best Attempt To Pander to Stoners” category. Electroplankton and Lumines were the runner ups. Interesting….

- Here’s a really interesting read from a concerned parent as to why video games and young children sometimes should not mix. Its finally nice to hear from a parent on the subject who isn’t all pitchforks and hang-rope.

- And here’s another dime a dozen type thing, but when they’re good, they’re pretty good: a vid of someone playing game music via the piano, this time, Sonic the Hedgehog.

- So the p.r. for the Xbox 360 in the UK is pretty awful. Take this video for example, which is basically three solid minutes dancers, tattoo artists, skateboarders, and some DJ chick who I think is a Spice Girl going on and on and on about something which I can’t follow since they’re British accents are so thick. Its pretty close to the Japanese p.r. vid in terms of lameness (though that at least features some game footage).

I don’t have the specifics, but the Xbox 360 launched in Japan last week and I hear its a colossal bomb. The price of the system has already been slashed a bit, though I don’t know to what extent. Meanwhile, new shipments are trickling into Best Buy and lines have formed for them across the city. This is the first time I’ve ever recall this happening for a system that’s already been launched…

- Something which also got lots of talk a little over a week ago, which John reminded me of recently, was Acclaim’s assets going up for auction, or at least the rights to their back catalogue. Though like most people, I’m only interested in Red Star…

- At Insert Credit, someone has proposed an interesting experiment to see if video game playing can be somehow measured and averaged. Basically, do people play the same level the same way? Does that make sense. If not, maybe this video of different plays of Gradius all shown simultaneously (via different tinted ships) might help. As already commented, it has a very Groundhogs Day feel to it…

- Want another reason why you shouldn’t feel bad for downloading music? Because K. K. Slider (you know, the guitar playing dog) in Animal Crossing DS says so.

- The prospect of playing Genesis games on Nintendo’s new system seems a tiny bit more possible. Plus I guess the big N really is making a controller shell! Eh… I already have my Cube Hori pad, so I’m not too worried.

- Not only is a new Sam & Max game on the way, but there’s a new web comic from Steve Purcell himself!

- Time for another neat game-related shirt, this time for Metal Slug. And it features German!

- I know this is relatively old, but I just learned about it not too long ago; 1UP’s super awesome look at the behind the scenes of ICO, straight from Ueda’s own presentation from the GDC a few years back.

- So I’ve been looking for it for seemingly forever, and someone has finally pulled through. Here’s a video (in two parts: number 1 and number 2) featuring two idiots trying to act a fight scene from King of Fighters.

- On a related noted, video games and Japanese wrestling goes hand in hand. And another thing I’ve been looking forever for also been finally delivered: videos featuring Hard Gay! And after you’ve read up on the guy, you can revel in his awesomeness here.

- Finally, here’s something I cam across a long whiles back and totally forgot about, but was reminded of via Simon last week. In the UK, home of the shittiest shit games imaginable is a Harry Potter clone called Barry Hatter. So for those of you who don’t know…

… you know, for shovelware, it really doesn’t look half-bad.

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12/20/2005

The Ride

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

I was only about ten minutes into my long walk to work and I was already exhausted. Now, normally, I’m a hardcore pedestrian (the ability to walk anywhere is still one of the primary reasons why I live in NYC), but things are a bit different in the winter. It wasn’t always the case; I got hit by a cab a few years back but walked it off, not realizing that it sorta broke my leg a tiny (its…. a long story, so wait for the comic book adaptation). I’ve spoken with several folks that have broken their bone and they too say that even after its long healed, it still aches during cold temperatures.

So yeah, there I was walking up 4th Ave in Brooklyn, and in pain. Normally, listening to video game music will sooth the soul, but even the soundtrack the Sonic 2 via my iPod wasn’t doing the trick. But at 14th St, I noticed this guy leaving his house, he sees me and asks a question, I pull out his headphones to hear what he has to say, and five minutes later I’m riding shotgun. His name was Adam.

A few minutes later, we’re parked at a designated carpool stop and asking folks walking up the street if they need a ride into the city. About five minutes after that, there’s four of us, packed in a small coup, making our way to the Manhattan Bridge.

Adam is a freelance sound guy who’s just wrapping up a gig on a reality tv show for the E channel. The other guy, who also happens to be the other Matt, works for the Gap in the print ad department, and who just moved here from San Francisco (today’s his second day at his new job). The lone girl is Monica, who’s a associate producer for the Geraldo Rivera show. And I guess along with myself, the car was filled was a pretty interesting mix of the media savvy.

The car ride was quite pleasant, mostly due to the conversations that arose from questioning each other’s backgrounds. Rivera’s mustache was discussed quite a bit, though my favorite comment was from Adam when he spoke about the show he’s working on, which tries to mend broken relationships. He talked about this one guy who’s a juggler, plus a comedian, which led me to ask if it was a Coney Island personality. And to that, the response was “I don’t think so… he didn’t smell like cabbage or anything.” Adam obviously knows his carny folks…

My original plan was to take the LIRR at Atlantic Ave to Jamaica in Queens, then transfer to a Penn Station bound train, but I would later find out that the stations are packed, and there are some pretty massive delays going on. So obviously, I really lucked out. All because of a guy who thought giving random strangers a lift would be “fun”. And all this proves that New Yorkers, for the most part, have their shit together in the event of the unknown (as also proven by the black out from a few years back, and of course, 9/11). Though I still have no idea as to what I’m gonna do when work is over…. Plus, I can’t wait for those “I survived the transit strike of 2005″ t-shirts!

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12/20/2005

And Here We Go…

by Matthew Edward Hawkins

So yeah…. the transit strike happened after-all. Awesome. I’ve been up since 5, watching the news and doing laundry. I was so busy trying to wrap presents last night that I totally forgot that I was out of clean socks, plus my thermals needed a wash as well; since I have no idea how I am going to work (I’ve tried hooking up with folks for a carpool via Craigslist all late last night and early this morning but with no real results), no do I know what I am after work (I might go to MK’s in Jersey, but I still have so much stuff to do at home… hence why I wanted to get all my X-mas wrapping done and over with, plus the need for clean clothes, to take with me as I hit the road).

As for my attitude towards the strike as well as the transit workers and their demands, I think I made myself pretty clear last week, and nothing has really changed (well I guess it’s gotten worse since I’ve discovered that garbage people on staff really do make about $50,000, as well as what constitutes a day’s work for them). But I guess the frustration and disgust that I myself, as well as many others, feel was pretty much summed up perfectly by a woman in the Bronx who was being interviewed on WNBC as she was waiting for a Metro North train (on her way to help deaf children, which is what she does for a living), who was near tears as she lamented how its killing her to pay for $76 for a monthly Metrocard as is, but how this morning alone, a cab was costing her $15, the Metro North was another $7, plus she knew that she would have to pay another $20 for a cab once finally in the city, and summed up her predicament by saying “How am I suppose to do this? I’m poor!”

Anyway…. my stuff is finally dried, so time to go.

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